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HA! PATHETIC LOSERS! I HAVE A BOYFRIEND!

So I guess this is a thread about bragging, such as how crushing your mother's dick is, or how many people have threatened to cut your ears off with a rusty fork, or how large your coin collection is.

Congratulations, friend.

I myself recently took in all the groceries in one trip.

Damn ok. I always try to do that and just barely fail. Good job.

Buy less groceries, fatty.

I'm a hungry boi

What's wrong with you? You sound insane. You're talking like a crazy person. (Stop being horny, yeesh.)

I FINALLY HAVE VACATION

But can your boyfriend beat up Green's boyfriend?

Let's be real. Barring the use of British knifery tactics, we both could.

My coin collection is pretty cool ngl

I have like 26 of the state quarters, several different kinds of euro, some german coins, a 50 cent piece, a bunch of brass coins with stars on them that look like mario coins, several hundred *other* brass coins that must've been from an arcade or something because they have "not actually a currency" or something stamped on them, some kind of yellow ohio memorial coin, and several things that I'm 90% sure were brass badges and buttons that got the grippy bits sanded off. I haven't seen it in a while but it's buried somewhere safe and nobody's getting the map from me ever.

Coin collections are based

But certainly not based on the gold standard anymore.

Oh yeah? Well I have TWO boyfriends! Take that!

Your two hands don't count!

Actually, it's my uncle and my left foot. Looks like you've been foiled once again.

So is Wizzy just trying his hardest to insult himself before everyone else can now?

If you cant beat 'em, join 'em!

Although to be fair, joining in on his own insult parade, sounds weirdly "on brand," of him anyways. I'd even go as far as to compare him to a exponentially discounted, alternative version of Emperor Palpatine whereas instead of winning regardless of who ACTUALLY wins. He loses in both directions instead :D

But hey! He's got two more "boyfriends" then I do so maybe he knows a little something about taking it from both directions!

If these are the same methods he uses to reassure his parents he's not gay, no wonder it's not working.

Shit.

The tomatoes and green beans in my garden are growing nicely.

That is very nice. Do you have any pictures?

As expected, Sherb has the most wholesome thing to say in any given conversation.

I can legally drink alcohol as of a few days ago.

This post makes me feel really really really old.

I have one too! Maybe we could have a boyfriend play date, as long as yours is up to date on all his shots. :~)

...

I can confirm that he is! I think he'd like that :)

Do vaccinations give boyfriends autism?

I think that was already foregone with some of the boyfriends around here.

Can confirm. No shots and all of the autism here.

But I'm pretty sure you're also not a boyfriend

More of a control group autist

I got a 125% on a test. This means I have at least 125 brain cells! Get FUCKEd nerds.

More like 125 chromosomes.