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Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago
Commended by Sherbet on 6/23/2023 5:17:58 PM

@Darius_Conwright

Well things didn't work out, but since you're a productive CYStian member with commended stories under your belt, here's some last Discord lols as your severance package.

- EndMaster

Of course for the non-blessed lesser born out there without access to the Halls of the Gods, we'll back up a bit with a little history:

Basically for several months Darius and several other CYStian members had a "clash of personalities." Sometimes just being a "productive" or "useful" member isn't enough to patch up the differences. This isn't a new thing and will definitely happen again in the future if the past is any indication.

However, Darius managed to not just annoy, but actually drive to anger which is saying something given that most are immune to even Ford levels of fucktardery around here.

Also impressive that Darius managed to not only do this, but to multiple people AND be so much like mud that attacks upon his worm like person did very little damage as he'd just agree that he was a pathetic faggot/retard/kumquat/Dutch/etc and keep it moving.

However, when enough heat and flame is applied, even mud will dry out and crack, and ultimately nothing could stop the power of the SUN like fury of the Werecappy.

Too many of those exchanges to post here, the mortals will just have to imagine the epicness of such things, so we will cut to the end of the tale after the last Cappy Crusade and these were the last moments of Darius "Dutch Faggot" Conwright

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/764417773983367169/1121629975150342184/Screen_Shot_2023-06-22_at_10.33.57_PM.png

It was here in the cage known as GAY HELL where the damned are temporarily sentenced that Darius decided that he could no longer continue.

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/764417773983367169/1121629993190039672/Screen_Shot_2023-06-22_at_10.34.21_PM.png

As we can see by Dark's last kick of Darius' corpse, death wouldn't be the end just yet.

Amusingly Cel who was the only one Darius directly apologized to decided to not just beat Darius' dead carcass, but go full NECRORAPE on it. Cel was so keen on munging the corpse that he even sent himself into GAY HELL to do it.

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/764417773983367169/1121630370698379264/Screen_Shot_2023-06-22_at_10.38.16_PM.png

Of course this was then followed by Cel enthusiastically sending himself to GAY HELL with instructions to free him later.

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/764417773983367169/1121630781903749120/Screen_Shot_2023-06-22_at_10.36.43_PM.png

(He's still down there)

In any case, now that Cel was in GAY HELL and Darius' dead body was as helpless as a roofied high school girl, Cel made his move!

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/764417773983367169/1121630751570534550/Screen_Shot_2023-06-22_at_10.39.35_PM.png

Well I hope the trip to GAY HELL was worth it you mad Nazi bastard.

In any case, while this tale ends with Darius' Discord Demise, as he said, he'll still be around on the site proper (Or at least that's what he said anyway)

I'm sure his next story about homosexuals will be just as well written as his last one. After all even the gayest CYStian is still better than the straightest CoGite. (Just kidding, there are no straight CoGites)

And what of Darius' arch nemesis? Well Malk appropriately had only a simple statement to say:

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/764417773983367169/1121630017928044574/Screen_Shot_2023-06-22_at_10.34.49_PM.png

Fin.

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago

Hey that's me! Well, I'm glad you got at least one punching bag around. Plus honored to have Endmaster write an eulogy for me.

P.S. keep that Serb in quarantine since he's autistic enough to think that I'm able to read what's on discord lol. I almost regret having remorse for that degen.

P.S.S. Malk, hmm, how should I word it properly, hope you'll be even happier when my gay story turns out to be better than yours :)

P.S.S.S. I'll leave all my inheritance to Thara, Cricket, and Sherb. It includes one promise to Thara that I'll draw her Lesbian wrestler story cover. For Cricket, a sack of the finest Dutch Cuisine and for Sherb a piece of wet cardboard. As of Enter, he'll get that half rotten Kapsalon I've left in the fridge.

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago

I would say I'm sad to see you leave the discord, but I don't use the discord, so I'm not. Welcome back to the boring world of the forums where you can go a good couple of days without anyone posting a fucking thing. ^_^

Also, very important... It's P.P.S. not P.S.S.

P.S. stands for post script. You're saying "post script script."

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago
I don't need a kapsalon. What's your sisters @

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago
RIP Darius. I never quite crossed the line into genuine hatred. I only wish spiders to burrow under your skin in a friendly rival kinda way

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago
Thanks. It's lovely. It looks just like what my cat leaves me.

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago

I haven't read any of your games because they look like they're for pedophiles but that's probably wrong 

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago

I liked Darius until he admitted that he wasn’t even gay..?

I was just chalking up his personality as him being gay.

But he's not even gay? What the fuck.

If he was gay, he'd be more likable, imo.

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago
Dutch and Chinese when combined are indistinguishable from gay.

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago

I'm glad the day of Darius's downfall has finally come, though it's a shame it didn't come fast enough for me to witness it.

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago

Yeah, was a true blast, wasn't even present on the best part. Heard they had fireworks and puppies.

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago

I thought everyone hated me when I first joined the discord server. However true that was, it was definitely a warmer welcome than the prolapsed asshole earned by Darius after he dropped the soap over and over--each time a supposed accident--in Serbian prison. His crime: giving women relationship advice like a virgin.

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago
RIP to the third gayest person in the Discord.

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago
I forgot Cel was down there.

How long will his oxygen supply last, anyone know?

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago

Anaerobic bacteria don't need oxygen.

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago

Apparently he's dead.

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago
This is weird. Any idea when it happened? I thought maybe I missed something since I spent yesterday passing out in a series of involuntary naps after the long shift. But doesn't look like anybody said anything.

I guess the official reason will have to be that Ford's poll really REALLY pissed him off.

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago

Heh, so words did hurt him after all, now that's he's hogging the spotlight during my own funeral. 

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago

Well in an update, it looks like Cel followed Darius in death. It had indeed been awhile since we'd heard anything since his raping of Darius' corpse. It had been suspected that he'd probably tell someone to lift him back out at which point someone (Probably me) would have done so, and life would have continued as normal.

Oddly it would have been Petros who officially noticed the silence (and smell) prompting me to check.

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/764417773983367169/1122252551014846564/Screen_Shot_2023-06-24_at_3.49.12_PM.png

After confiming that Cel was indeed dead, Petros decided to pay the last respects in a manner that Cel probably wouldn't have approved of given Petros' dark skin complexion, but perhaps it was fitting. Petros went to GAY HELL.

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/764417773983367169/1122252575497003098/Screen_Shot_2023-06-24_at_3.48.39_PM.png

RIP

(Don't worry folks, Petros is no longer in GAY HELL)

The reasons for Cel following Darius in death are probably too long to list here, but the result is the same.

Well I can only guess that after all this Wizzy can expect to get the brunt of Malk's mad cappy rage again, though he's used to it. Ford is now the only one left of the gay trio and Petros is the last black man standing of ALL the newer members that got blessed with entry of the Hall of the Gods.

But the cycle will continue as it always does...

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago
And then there was one- with the gayest member of them all being the only survivor of the three.

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago
I'm guessing he may have just contracted something from coming into such close contact with Darius's moist gelatinous flesh and unsalted green orbs.

At any rate, I'll miss some of the bants, but I can't argue with your facts, the server is 2/3rds less gay now. In fact, if you consider that Darius was the gayest man alive, TCat was the edgiest most anti-gay little Turkish girl we've ever seen, and Cel was all of those things at the same time, some kind of equilibrium has definitely been restored.

Ford is a permanent fixture who can never be dislodged, but he's probably forgotten the others by now anyway.

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago

"TCat was the edgiest most anti-gay little Turkish girl we've ever seen"

This conjures a hilarious image of a little kitten dressed in traditional Muslim clothing throwing alphabet people off a roof.

While I'm sure she knows, she still has daughter status of course. That hasn't changed.

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago
>Turkish

Smh, just give out her SSN, legal name, and address while you're at it, why don't you?

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago
kek

(TC, you're still my favorite Turk though)

Darius' Discord Demise

11 months ago
who?

Darius' Discord Demise

8 months ago
I actually did not mean to insult Darius. I like the gay a lot more than the average member. That was supposed to be a warm send-off.