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Will Ebon return?

3 years ago
@EbonVasilis, as some very few of you may recall, had a meteoric rise to relevancy, even greatness, back in the misty past of 2018, in the Time Before the Great Masking. James Bonding his way into the confidences of detestable weeb children, he proved indispensable in bringing about a crushing victory for the forces of tyranny in the storied Bantastic Thread. Sitting at the table in fellowship with the legendary heroes of the kingdom now, he wrote two featured stories, Magno and The Lost Realm, and for a time he seemed unstoppable. Sadly, it was then he began to flounder somewhat, plagued by flashbacks of all the helpless children he'd slaughtered in the Weeaboo War, constantly haunted by the thought that he deserved more medals and accolades for this, and that he should've killed more. This led him into a pointless yet undeniably homoerotic feud with @WouldntItBeNice, aka Wibn, aka Three-Toothed Billy of the Hills, scribe of the Eastern Lands. Smitten as he was, many felt he had let himself get sidetracked into an unproductive distraction. And the difficulties for Ebon just kept piling up. He was dealt a crushing defeat by a monster called a Paryt Tyme Jobbe, a terrible beast that tests the mettle of the young and drains the souls of the weak. He underwent a lengthy convalescence, and when he recovered, it was only to announce that he was totally over Wibn now, and had instead received the calling of his God to go off into the uncharted lands and live among naked oiled up tribesmen. Most believe his story ends there. But for those of us who have read the prophecy he left behind...
Hello there random user! You are reading the profile of EbonVasilis. Look down below for my storygames. All are original, but The Lost Realm is currently my crowning story. I am currently out of country/state, and will be unavailable until the approximate time of summer 2021. If you are reading this and it is the fall of 2021, then I am likely dead or otherwise incapacitated. If so, then I relinquish all my points to TharaApples. (for what they’re worth) If by 2022 I have not logged in, then feel free to ban/decapitate this corpse of an account. If I am back on time, then all statements above should be rendered defunct. If there arise any questions, then don’t pm me. Instead I would like you to open the forums up, create a thread in the lounge, and tag EndMaster three times in the same post. After that you should await further instruction within that thread. Enjoy the stories otherwise!
That's right. Summer 2021 is just around the corner. So. Is he coming back? Did he forget us? Will the rest of the promised Lost Realm series ever be written? Will the smouldering sexual tension between him and Wibn ever be resolved, or will he take an African's spear up the derriere? Does he still look good in a suit? Get in line to bet your points on the outcome now!* *in light of the note on his inheritance, Thara may not ban him to make sure he doesn't return.

Will Ebon return?

3 years ago

No heterosexual man on Earth reacts with that level of extreme fury to mild sexual ribbing in an IRC chat. I hope Ebon is out there living his best life with some Mormon twink 

Will Ebon return?

3 years ago
Let's not forget accepting a Valentine's rose from a gay kid at school and then later burning it.

Will Ebon return?

3 years ago

I have stolen enough points from dead users recently to have some gambling dosh to throw around. A thousand pointless points on Ebon's triumphant return!

Will Ebon return?

3 years ago

I'll take that bet 

Will Ebon return?

3 years ago

Well apparently points are coming my way. 

Depending on the worst/best(?) case scenario. In regards to my CYS retirement fund at least. 

Will Ebon return?

3 years ago

You forgot to mention how a gay dude gave him a rose once, he took it and burned it or something because he was so disgusted by the thought of being a big HOMO.

EDIT: Nevermind, I see it was mentioned later.

Well, it's important enough to mention again anyway.

Will Ebon return?

3 years ago
Even years later, sometimes I just randomly think back on that story and giggle. If Ebon comes back we should have a contest where everyone writes their own take on this event. Hell, it would even make for a good storygame. The companion piece to Gay and Depressed: Gay and in Denial.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
The time is getting closer...

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
Ebony logged in briefly yesterday. I SEE ALL.

....but this still doesn't count as a return until we get an official communication, all bets are still on.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
Agreed. But technically, he says, " If you are reading this and it is the fall of 2021, "

Fall does not officially begin until Wednesday, September 22...

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
Correct. There is still plenty of time to go and find him.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

@EbonVasilis please, I could lose so many pointless points for believing in you.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
Nearly September already. Things aren't looking so good for Ebon.

I know, I know what you're all thinking. "Who's Ebon?"

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

Well it appears that Ebon did not return.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

Meh, he was dead as soon as he said he was leaving the site to perform the missionary position in Africa.

Something like that anyway.

Anyway he's been dead a long time.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

Still 21 days, as Ogre pointed out.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
Just one week to go...

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

It looks like I'll be ninety-three points richer soon. 

This isn't going to be healthy for the tentative CYS points economy.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
Remember, it's cheating to gift him 5000 points right before you collect.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

That's an interesting suggestion, but I'm a professional so I would never do that. 

My fingers are still crossed for a last minute return.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
I just want the update on the suit compatibility.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

Still good if I do say so myself. 

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
Pics or it isn't true.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
yes

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
I knew it

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
Ebon sure is just a couple days away from letting the detestable Wibn (who does nothing on this site and yet still comes creeping around like Gollum to softly paw at the noobs with moist hands while they sleep) officially become of higher status than him.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

I can hardly imagine a more detestable state of being than "lower status than wibn". Confound him!

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
Seems like an interesting guy, I’m rooting for a surprise appearance last minute.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
Commended by mizal on 9/20/2021 5:19:15 AM

@EbonVasilis

I CALL UPON THE POWERS OF CHAKKR AND THE FIELDS OF ETERNITY
WITH THE BLOOD OF AN ELDER GOBLIN I CALL THEE BACK FROM THE VOID



BY THIS SUMMONING CIRCLE, YOU MUST RETURN!

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

He's getting wrecked by R.M. life. You're summoning is just going to delay his return.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
Everyone really should watch this, it's Sent's most impressive work yet, and also irrefutable proof that he sold his soul to the Devil for photoshopping powers. (Should've just summoned 1000 points, bitch.)

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

Alright I'm sick of people even talking about Ebon. Have been for awhile.

He's dead and I already transferred what remains of his soul from his rotting corpse to Thara. Even if he comes back, he took too fucking long and has to start all over again.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

F.

Rest in Prego, Ebons. 

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
Can confirm: went through the Salt Lake airport today and did not see him even once.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
Deadline date 1: missed

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

I'm holding out until november.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
It is I. Blessings upon the faithful.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
Good lord

It’s that person.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
Hold the fuck up.

i've been tricked

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
This Ebon looks sounds like a disease of the girl parts, you might want to see a doctor.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

FUCK

I went just a line too high when I reached into the celestial phonebook. Back to the void with you, you curr! Bring back the guy who wins me money!

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

I guess I'm a little too late, huh? 

Appreciate the thread @mizal

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

You're just in time for me to collect my money. It was literally the last possible day.

Too bad it didn't save yours.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

A shame. You are quite welcome though, and consider it a happy coincidence of fate that today I realized this thread existed. 

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
I checked and double checked for trickery and this does indeed seem to be the real Ebon, congrats on the success of that spell and saving your pointless points Sent! (You already weighed the same as a duck so I don't think the methods you had to use will change things for you much.)

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
I was hoping that you would check. This seems quite suspicious.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

Didn't you bet that he would return by the start of fall? It's been fall for 5 days already.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
Oh what the heck, how is this possible. Welcome back!

I guess once you were declared dead the necromantic energies running wild in CYStia were able to raise you. Although we might need a new suit pic to prove you aren't a balrog after Sent used such unorthodox means of retrieval.

Are you going to be around again or is this just a quick visit?

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

Basically, I felt I had some unfinished business here. I just want to write one last story game haha. Will probably take me forever to accomplish, but that's why I am here. 

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

Well Steve's dead and Wibbons has become a Gollum like creature that just lurks only occasionally popping up to mention his precious anime. All your enemies are all gone.

Unless you mean unfinished business where you FAILED to turn in a story for one of the contests I ran when you were last here.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

Mostly referring the the latter. I'd prefer to not have shame following me around til the end of time. 

Steve was always the type to die early, but I am surprised Wibbons didn't just take advantage of the lack of competition there was and try and really put himself on top. Oh well for them there. 

Edit: Is there a spark notes version to the last two years or so of the site?

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

All important CYStian history has been recorded in the pinned threads at the top of the Lounge.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
The most important thing is that Endmaster has published a new storygame, which has been featured in the Endmaster section.

And as you can see, the site has had a minor facelift from Killa and Nightwatch (you wouldn't know Nightwatch, he just appeared one day), which incorporates a redo of all the art by MHD.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

I don't even think Ebon read Rogues, think he left either just before or after it was published.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

Yeah, I did end up reading it. I think I was missing a few endings, but I got through most of it. The new one you have is the Pure, the Bile and the Deadly, right?

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
No, but he did right The Pure, the Vile, and the Deadly. You should read that one right away. I'm on the second main branch right now. 8/8

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

Oops. I hate auto correct. Meant to say Vile. 

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

Well, I became a sorceror, apparently.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
Welcome back, guy I don't know!

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

Steve logged in yesterday. 

Wibn has debased himself to the point where he has lost what little esteem he had 

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
Wow. Ok, I'll go with the idea that this is really you.

Welcome back! I bet you're feeling quite different after a trip like that. I hope you're well!

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
Hi! I see you're really back this time.

Hope to see you around :)

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
Oh hey, so how was the sojourn?

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

In short, really really good. It served as a great time to grow up a bit and think about more than myself. 

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

Very late. Now you're pointless, without points. '

However, thanks to what one can deem as unworthy nepotism, I currently have the power to make you not so pointless and broke. Well, you're lucky that with me being an on and off admin, I haven’t currently removed my powers at the time of this post due to my on-and-off feeling of inadequacy. 

But being unhappy would be an insult to EndMaster, which would imply he made a mistake and lapse of judgement. Which is impossible.

But enough about me, I can go on about myself for hours. Here's something to get you back on your feet. You have nice stories, so I think you at least deserve a nice title like Wordsmith or something.

Now you don't have to do back-alley rim-jobs favors for points. 

Great return. 

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
A world on the cusp of disaster. Two sides on the verge of destroying each other, but there is hope. In the form of a hero. Now this will hero..., will they be able to rise into the mantle of hero?

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

Many thanks Thara! I knew I made the right choice in leaving you what remained of my soul. Anyhow, I'll make use of this stipend and get to work on a storygame to redeem my name further. And instead of producing a half-baked one like the last time you loaned me some points, this one will be good. 

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
Wizzy has suggested that we request a shirtless pic from you to prove you are not just a bunch of kobolds in a suit. He also asks that your bare feet be visible in the photograph.
Pretty sure the suit pic would be enough to confirm it's you, but I suppose it cannot hurt to take every precaution when so much is on the line.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

Well this sounds like it has an ulterior motive. 

My answer is no. I would rather not. 

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
I am sure Wizzy meant nothing more by it.

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

Wizzy can't speak for themself? 

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
There's no simple answer to that question

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago
@EbonVasilis, what do you think of a well-lit pair of ears?

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

I think a well-lit pair of ears are a great addition to anyone's face. The well-part is key. Otherwise someone might end up looking like Sveld filth. 

Will Ebon return?

2 years ago

Welcome back Ebon! I am definitely not the Wizzy that Cricket was talking about and you definitely don't remember me. Enjoy writing/reading/whatever and good day!