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Hello all you CYStians!

For some of you, it's still Wednesday, but for me it's a Thursday. Please enjoy our regular issue, filled with interviews, cool art, advertisements for CYS-related activities and more!

Thanks and acknowledgements to all our staff members who went above and beyond the call of duty to produce so much stuff that we had push quite a bit to the next issue!

The pictures here are clickable! If you want the slideshow of this article, here's a link.

We got alot of incredibly cool artists contributing their art work to this one. I'd like to thank MHD, Suranna, and in their gazette artist debut, Liminal and Avo!

All of these artists did such a great job, and really breathed life into the issue.

Truly the best issue yet! While I may be biased due to being on the front page, there really was a lot of amazing content here. We set out to prove the Gazette works better when everyone acts as a team. Great job, everyone!

Below is my answer for RK's math puzzle. Stop reading if you want to work it out yourself.



RK should skip his turn as that will force me to try and use my shot on Liminal. If I succeed, Liminal is dead. If I fail, Liminal will use his turn to kill me. Since RK is first in the turn order, he would attempt to kill whoever survives. It's not perfect but I can't see any way to get better odds, though I could definitely be missing something obvious.

Another fantastic article :D The artwork in this one was fantastic!

My drawing looks worse on the page :(

I thought it didn't look good before but especially compared to the other stuff made...

also, reading this through, I have a friend with autism and he's fine. He's amazing, actually. I look away from a teacher, I'm zoning out. He never really makes eye contact or looks at people unless you ask him to, but he can repeat what you said to him word by word for 10 freaking minutes.

Avo you did amazing! It was an incredibly cool drawing. Seriously, before publishing, we would read through the gazette to see how everything looks, and I was incredibly impressed with the variety of styles, and the sheer creativity of our CYStians. Seriously, you guys are one talented and amazing bunch, and your art was awesome! I mean, I think you have a tendency towards self critique, which, honestly, we all do, but you really did a great job, and your art added character and life to my article. So Kudos!

RK likes everything. I mock everything. I also enjoyed your work. Thank you for helping us out during a tight deadline!

Thanks for another great article! I always look forward to these. 

they're great, but they're a bit long.

Huh, somehow we've never actually gotten this critique before. I mean, we've been accused of not being able to read a prompt(ok true), of being the GAY-zette(perhaps?), but too long???

This is thoroughly unprecedented! But I like it! We're in uncharted territory, folks!

Sorry :(

Damn, my art looks so bad next to all of these talented artists!!! Thanks for commissioning me anyway, RK.

This was a great issue, and now I think I know what happened with Fresh… I could, of course, be wrong. Sigh. Can’t trust even kind people on the internet, can you? Well, this is a valuable lesson for us all.

Dude, your art was awesome, don't say that! You did a great job! The popcorn drawing and the combat drawing really brought the issue to life, and made the riddle so much more fun to read!

Oh, I guess Chris was wrong telling everyone "wait on the Gazette".

We'll have to leave the real dirt on what happened to Fresh up to independent reporters it seems.

I’d rather just let you know who speak their mind on the subject on their own if they want to. I leave it in their hands for how they want to handle it.

And yet this rag devoted extensive interview space to a delusional brony and a retarded Indian who was to all indication FAKE NEWS fabricated by the Gazette staff to begin with. Wow! Sounds like the public may need to go elsewhere for the real news and hard hitting facts. 🤔

G A Y

The gazette needs to be accountable for the actions of their staff smh. Cancelled

I'm never giving them another dime!

Don't worry guys, we still have a bunch of super cool special interest topics! Like, there's a fascinating article about fungi in horror movies written by yours truly, and we also support local artists. CYS is truly the newspaper of the people!

Unfortunately for me, I don't care about either of those things. I care about the fungal horror under Fresh's bed

Well, don't you think it's an important distinction whether the fungal horror under fresh's bed has hyphae networks that stretch for miles, spreading nerve signals back and forth like a tremendous nerve net? Or whether it's parasitic, burrowing its way into someone's brain even as they speak. Or whether it's actually hallucinogenic and causing everyone in the house to believe they are denizens of a lost city, sent by God to restore the glory of their city by conquering Earth?

Like, who knows what bed fungi can be truly capable of, especially in the hands of a talented enough horror writer. That would be cool, right?

Don't you dare publish this fucking article without mentioning Alpha Centauri or you'll never work in this town again.

Just going to use this as a way to try and point out that I posted some body/parasite/slight fungus horror infodump a llittle bit ago:

pushing down the link so that it doesn't break the front page

The post in question

     Links break the page too?! Alongside italics?! Why does that even happen at all, has someone mentioned maybe fixing this in bugs and problems yet? I feel like everyone knows this is an issue. And this is in no way me insulting the mod's ability to make the site function, just a comment.

Yep. It's the small, annoying things that make the site slightly more difficult to navigate, but are small enough on their own that the coders don't want to fix them when they could be doing better things with their lives. Everyone eventually learns to do certain things to stop them from happening.

That's what I figured out so far, at least. If anyone wants to correct me, feel free to do so.

The issue with the front page has already been explained. Someone would pretty much have to rewire the site from the ground up to allow post previews without the occasional glitch when the preview cuts off a closing tag.

And it's a glitch that fixes itself as soon as a couple more posts are made. Which with you around will never take more than a few minutes.

Oh. And yea, maybe I comment a bit too much but after you pointed out how many posts I have I've become a bit proud of it.

Okay but seriously, you know who just like the rest of us had been under the impression this was going to come out in the Gazette.

There will certainly be another thread made soon, but it could've happened already if we hadn't been giving you guys the chance the break the story as part of your elaborate journalism RP.

Or as Petros would say, G A Y.

We apologize. I'm not sure if we gave any impression that we would, but we should've notified you know who at the very least that we were gonna leave it up to them to tell the story.

Ultimately, thought, at least you know who is able to tell the story their way. Probably better that way since they were the ones dealing with this firsthand. I am NOT looking forward to seeing those pictures after what I've heard, though.

Yes you are, you dirty little fuck. I can tell from here how much you're fiending for those pics you oily little goblin

I can't really read this on my phone, but as far as the Tylenol thing goes, it was pointed out by Sabley when that "news" broke that their parent company is Kenvue, who are known for running an anti-bribery and anti-corruption campaign in the US.

That may be all the explanation needed as to why they got singled out this way.

You're all fags.

Thank you :)

Also, just wanted to thank @Bill_Ingersoll and @Gryphon for sharing their expertise and some words of wisdom with all of us!

I really enjoyed both of these interviews, and I enjoyed talking to Bill as well. We had a few questions that were cut from the main issue due to lack of space, so please scan the QR code to see this amazing interview in its entirety.

I won't be doing that

I'm reading from a rotary phone, I'm not doing that.

Are you joking? Rotary phones don't have screens or letters.

Are you calling me a liar?

Not exactly but how could you access CYS with a rotary phone? If you had one though that would be awesome, they're hardly around anymore.

Neither is your dad

Shut up, he's around quite a lot of the time

Does he still beat you when he drinks?

?! He doesn't drink or beat me. You're assuming I have an awful dad. 

It's what men do

I think my dad would hurt himself trying to beat me. You have no idea how old he is. He's older than my grandma on my mom's side, it's a bit crazy sometimes. And occasionally funny.

Ahhh, so he's past his beating and raping days. You're lucky

WHAT?!?!

This is what men do

No! Too many people do it, but not everyone. I don't know a single one of my friends's parent's who are abusive. Well, one but that's besides the point.

You must be white

Why does that make a difference?

My father had three wives. He only killed the black one. Do the math

It's not math. If you're going for a metaphor it's better to use put 2 and 2 together. And you must have a crazy dad (no offense meant). And this reminds me, what makes something racist? I am often called racist by peers for what I thought were harmless comments.

You being white makes it racist

But it's not fair that I can't say it and others can :(

You called someone a nigger, didn't you?

No! Why do you think I'd say something like that?!?!

You're white... you get called racist... you want to say something you can't

I just said that the avatar in a game my friend next to me was playing was black. And it was! And they called me racist. I siad it wasn't even related to black people, who aren't even black they're brown, and we're not white we're tan, and they all gasped like I spewed profanity.

EDIT: They were messing with me, weren't they? Now I feel stupid.

Are your friends niggers, or are they also white?

A variety. Pretty half and half, why?

EDIT: and I wouldn't use that word.

It changes whether they were messing with you or not. I suppose they probably were. I will switch to the word coon rather than nigger to avoid offense

Thanks.

Well now she can just chase them off her porch with a broom!

My phone does a lot of things; it used to be a big family scandal that my great-grandfather dated Nikola Tesla for awhile, if you must know. But it still didn't scan QR codes.

Cool!

Wow these look better and better every month.

Well, yeah. The more you do something the better you get at it so it's logical that it would get better over time.

Are you autistic by any chance?

What? Not that I know of but I've never had a diagnosis or anything to prove against it. Why?

Just some strong autist vibes is all.

Why is it giving off autist vibes?

You give them off quite earnestly.

There's no shame in that, Avo. I do too!

What does being serious have to do with autism (unless I missunderstand what earnest means)?

This is between you, your parents, and the future doctor that will diagnose you in the foreseeable future. 

Oops! I just realized I used diagnosed wrong, when you get diagnosed it isn't the doctor checking for, for example, autism it's when they say you DO have autism (or ADHD, dyselxia, whatever).

That's sounds like what they're going to do for you.

Are you excited?

Uh... it's not bad or good. Also I thought I fit ADHD more than I did autism, but I didn't really look into either very much, only enough for my science project.

Both can work.

True. God, it's been a year since that project! I should still have the slideshow, I'm gonna pull it up and look at symptoms.

Have fun.

I think I get where you're coming from now...

Grinning face with sweat emoji.

What, do you think I'm going to bite you or something? I kept this slideshow because it's my first Choose Your Story, I want to keep it. And it's handy sometimes. I made it a choose your story so classmates wouldn't get bored and zone out during my presentation.

EDIT: I regretted it a lot, attention is scary

Your teeth aren't sharp enough to break skin.

What's that supposed to mean? literally, yes.

It means I find you retarded and useless like Blister.

Hey!

>:(

=P

Blegh.

whatever.

This might be the highest post count Gazette issue ever.

It's a back and forth, when these start they go on for a while. And it got me to 900 posts! :D

I like the way you find a positive result out of being called racist and autistic (I don't think you're either btw) :D It's good you don't let stuff get you down :)

Thanks :)

Thank you Aldreda! I'm so happy you liked this one!

fine work! Nicely done

Great work on a very special edition, everyone.

It's special? This is the first gazette I've seen, it's special? I thought it's just a bunch of news and that they all were just a bunch of news.

EDIT: Well, it's more than that and has meaning to it but you get what I mean (I hope).

Transcription for Avo who probably can't watch it due to being a literal child: "Shut the fuck up. Goddamn, nigga."

Avo really wants to say that word.

??? I can't even see what malk posted, what word? Nigga? Is that even a swear?

Okay this one isn't actually a kid this is a bit 

a bit? This one? By this one, do you mean this person or?...

You broke the homepage.

Is that what we're calling your moms back 

I mean, she'd be pretty old, you need to be more careful.

She is pretty old, and currently travelling in Italy, so at least she should have good medical care should that happen.

A bit? By bit do you mean with teeth or..?

I can't see that either. Also sorry for suddenly leaving, my break was over.

You're sounding like a bot today.

bot as in stupid or bot as in machanical and like I could have been AI generated?

Yeah, this is a good critical thinking exercise to break down this one sentence critique.

"Okay this one isn't actually a kid this is a bit" - There is no punctuation so it might be a little confusing, but that is not unsurmountable.

Okay - This first word is probably intended to be isolated and is often used as an initial response to hearing or seeing something that was unexpected or surprising in some way. It does not seem to have a connection to anything else in the sentence and can probably be ignored.

This one - This phrase in this context almost always refers to the most recent topic or speaker. The post this one was a reply to was yours, so they are probably talking about you or your response with this phrase, but it isn't completely clear at this point.

isn't actually - this phrase means that it's subject is the opposite of what would normally be inferred. As it follows "this one", we can assume that it means "this one" is somehow different than typically expected.

a kid - finally some real clarification. Now we know that this one is almost certain referring to a person, and it can be logically inferred that that person is you. So we can string together that the statement "this one isn't actually a kid" means that Malk does not think that you are a child.

this - As we have already found the meaning of the prior phrase, it can be assumed that there was probably a missing period right before this word. So we can assume that "this is a bit" is meant to be a third sentence in the post.

This is a bit - So we see a repeat of this, but it's missing the "one" that went with it last time. Also, since we know that "this one" was talking about you, a person, it is likely that if this was also meant to refer to you specifically it would have been "they" or even "she". Because Malk didn't do that, we can assume that this "this" probably means either your post or perhaps your general demeanor. A bit can refer to a joke or set of related comedic scenes. As the prior phrase indicated that Malk does not think you are a child, and has been making comments in response to the child-like nature of the previous questions you have posted, then it is logical to assume that Malk is trying to communicate that since you aren't a kid, but have been posting in a child-like manner, that Malk is assuming that you are actually an adult who is acting like a child, likely in a joking or playful manner.

Does that help clarify?

It is special as it is the first issue with our new, reworked staff roster. It also has a focus (as did the recent actual "special" issue) on increasing awareness of doxxing and trolling. In the long-ago before times, when a show did an episode with a particular focus on raising awareness about a topic they often labelled it as a "very special episode".

I just discovered this site a few days ago. Even though I am new to this corner of the internet, I just wanted to say that I enjoyed reading this and am looking forward to future editions. I was initially just going to have a brief glance out of curiosity in between sessions of playing BerkaZerka's Dead Man Walking, but Benholman44's front page article got me immediately invested. I enjoyed it all, good work to everyone involved.

Hey Diogenes!

I’m one of the people who worked on the issue. Dude thank you so much for responding and welcome to the site!

Ben did a wonderful job on his article, and he brought up some really important and salient points about misconceptions with Tylenol and causing autism, and he breaks each of them down with well researched and cogent arguments

Also I love your username, Diogenes was quite an interesting guy who had a pretty unorthodox way of living.

We have issues coming out every month, and we’re already hard at work on the next issue!

Thanks and you're welcome! Haha yeah Diogenes was an oddball and an underappreciated legend. He goes a bit far off the deep end at times, but I like a lot of his ideas at least at the surface level.

I particularly liked your fungus article, I have always had an affinity for fungi, especially in horror and fantasy media. The fungi-themed media recommendations list was appreciated.

I'll keep an eye out for the next issue, keep up the good work :)

"An affinity for fungi" This guy smokes shrooms