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Well, I'm fucked.

I'm sure a lot of you will probably remember that delightful little breakdown I had a few months back where I couldn't sleep for about a month straight and turned into a full blown crazy person? Well, lucky me! It's back again. I've sort of been up and down for the past couple of weeks, but tonight it's gone back to what it was like before where I'm up at 5:30 in the morning trying everything I can think of to go to sleep and failing miserably. No fun :'(

Does anybody else have any experience with insomnia, or have any advice or ideas on ways to get to sleep? I really don't want to be a crazy person again. >.<

i've been on some meds that have given me insomnia and then sometimes i get it cuz of stress. doc gave me flexeril some years back for chronic back pain and i'll take a small dose to help me sleep when i got insomnia. the only shit that's helped me is meds but if you dont wanna go that route i'm sure there are other things you can try. i heard exercise helps some people but for others it just makes them wired. maybe try melatonin or something so you dont risk getting addicted to something or bad side effects.

Really sorry to hear that, that sucks. Hope you've been feeling better since then.

Anyway, if by meds you mean sleeping tablets, I was taking them for a little while but I find that, while they would knock me out for a few hours, they didn't actually make me any less tired. I guess 'cos it was more of a dreamless sleep, so when I wake up, I don't actually feel rested.

I guess exercise might help, but of course the insomnia makes me really tired and when I'm tired I don't want to do exercise (also, I'm just a lazy bitch in general.) Still, I guess it's definitely worth a try if it doesn't get any better. Thank you. ^_^

good luck with your insomnia. i hope it calms down for you soon.

i sleep better in a cool room too. lots of websites say that sleeping in a cool, dark room is ideal.

Yeah, I find that sometimes putting o relaxing music or ASMR videos in the background will eventually help me go to sleep, but sometimes it doesn't.

Thanks Miz.

I actually don't drink caffeine at all, so can't do much about that... But yeah, quitting screens and maybe reading a book for a litttle while before bed would probably help. I think the fact that, when I can't sleep, I instantly turn to the internet is probably not helping at all.

Strangely enough, after I made this post about having insomnia again, I actually managed to get a bit of sleep afterwards... So I guess that sharing my problems and getting stuff off my chest helped me feel less stressed, so yeah, it's nice to have you guys to talk to. ^_^

(I should really join the discord again, but I know that when I'm on there I don't get any writing done.) >.<

I'm sorry, that sounds bad. At the levels you're describing, I know I'd personally seek out medical help, but then again that's just me and I don't like telling people what to do. Best I can do is whish you the best and hope you can get over this eventually.

Well, the first time it was for like a month straight and it was constant. This time, it's only been for a few weeks and definitely not every day. I think there's only been like three days in the past couple of weeks where I couldn't sleep. Still, will definitely seek out medical help if it gets any worse.

There's an odd trick that sometimes works for me. Blink really fast 100 times. Count it out in your head. The counting focuses the mind away from stray thoughts, and by about 45-50 blinks the eyelids have just gotten pretty tired of moving.

Haven't heard of that one before! Will definitely try it out if I can't get to sleep again. Thanks. ^_^

Could try meditating - count to 100 but focus only on the numbers and nothing else sorta stuff.

Yeah, that's a good idea. I guess that focussing on something else helps to clear the mind of all the stuff you're stressed about, which would make your brain ready for sleep. ^_^

Ahahaha, all week, i've been in trouble. I should be asleep right now. I havent been sleeping for more that 3 hours at a time (uncomfortably at that) and getting very little work done due to tiredness. I've got so many illustrations to get done! But I can't find the spirit to do them...

  Mine is a symptom of my OUT OF CONTROL ADHD which ive only just identified, so i dont know what to do about it. I'm in a pickle, or maybe in a whole barrel of pickles.... Last time this happened, I passed out at school and snoozed a whole 17 hours. I didn't wake up particularly energetic or nothin'. I hate it cos' i start talking wacky and holing up in my room unnaturally.

It seems I don't have much advice. I've tried working out a but beforehand and it helps out somewhat, but please dont push yourself to the edge. It makes your brain explode, which is bad for brains. A doctor if you need to.

Oh fuck! That sounds really bad. Yeah, I definitely start talking wacky when I haven't slept. Sounds very similar to what I had before. Have you seen a doctor about it at all?

Mmm, I can't remember the last time I went to a doctor. Sometime....at some point? In all honesty, I think it's like, an ADHD thing thats never been brought up before. I was doing some reading and not to be a self diagnosing bastard, but this is like, glaringly obvious. It explains a lot of "quirks" from my childhood too.

Having such a terrible sleep schedule sure puts me in downer mood, I think. But I still have a lot of things to get done!

Yeah, I've heard that people with ADHD can have trouble with insomnia. Maybe you should talk to your doctor about it if it's gotten really bad. :(

I get insomnia every other day. Now that Fall is really beginning to feel like Fall, this shouldn't be as much of a problem. Sorry to hear about your situation.

Wow, that sounds really bad. Does your brain get really over-active?

Only if I have something on my mind. But summertime heat is overwhelming. I live in South Texas.

Ah! Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. It gets really hard to sleep when it's super hot. >.<

I really do feel for you. I don't have insomnia, but I can't sleep straight for 4 hours. So I'll wake up in the night randomly to have to wait another hour to fall back asleep. 

I was on my vacation when you couldn't sleep, so I don't know how it affects you, but I really do feel for you.

Thanks Dave. That's really nice of you to say. ^_^

No problem, praying for you.

Thank you <3

Have you tried sleeping pills? When I have trouble falling asleep, 2 pills are enough to make me fall asleep within at most an hour.

Yeah, but like I said, they only knock me out for about 4 hours and don't actually make me feel any less tired. :(

That's an interesting one. I haven't heard that before. Suppose next time I could try a Trailer Park Boys marathon. :p

Well, happy to say that I actually slept really well last night, so it's definitely not as bad as it was the first time. I think I just need to try and keep my mind focussed on one thing at a time, otherwise it gets really overactive and I can't sleep.

Hurray! Glad you're sleeping better.

Really Glad your sleeping better!!! 

Thankz AzBaz. Annoyingly, the insomnia's gone and gotten really bad again and I didn't sleep at all last night, but I did end up going to the doctor and getting some sleeping pills in the end. I really don't like taking them, but they'r better than nothing.

Probably best not to take them right before you go to bed. Then you'd just be dead tired in the morning. I know from personal experience.

Oh... When do you take them then? o.o

Haven't done that in a while. Several hours before going to sleep. Probably better just to consult the doctor about when best to take the pills. I don't want to give you any bad advice.

That's fair enough... Or I could always just look it up on the internet... 'Cos the internet is always right! :p

Always try to avoid drinking any caffeine several hourse before going to bed. And probably not a good idea to do any heavy reading right before bedtime. That'll generate too many Beta brainwaves.

Really? I always thought it was supposed to be good to read before bed.

I have heard that valerian root is a natural supplement that helps. I also struggle a bit with this, but for me it’s always because I am distracted. If I have something to do (tv, book, computer, Endmaster story-game) I’ll choose that over sleeping. If I lay in bed and turn everything off, eventually I just get bored or realize how tired I am and sleep. I think a lot of people get good at distracting themselves. I’m not saying that is you, particularly if you have a medical issue, but that is my problem. For me I have learned if I force myself to laystill for an hour sleep eventually comes...but I hardly ever do that until 2:00 or 3:00 am lol!

Nah, unfortunately that's not working for me at all. Last night I lay in bed for three and a half hours. Couldn't get to sleep. So I read for about half an hour and then tried again. Still didn't work. What happens when I have insomnia is that I end up just laying in bed for hours trying to get to sleep and it just doesn't work. >.<

I know if you have a big meal a few hours before you go to bed, that could keep you up. You don't eat a lot before you go to sleep, do you?

Nah. I mean, I eat my dinner at about 6, so that's awhile before I go to bed. ^_^

I’m sorry to hear that, I hope you are able to find what works for you! Everyone is different so it might be worthwhile to experiment with different supplements and techniques. 

Yeah. Well I'm hoping that now I've gotten sleeping tablets and antidepressants, I'll be able to go back to normal. The antidepressants seemed to work straight away last time, so hopefully I can put this little relapse behind me and get back to normal. Will keep you posted tomorrow.

Either way, I think talking about it has helped a lot, so thanks all you guys for listening and giving me advice on what to do. <3

Best of luck to you. The older I get, the more I suffer Insomnia. 

That sounds like a really fun idea. Thanks Ogre! ^_^

Well, I'm afraid it's only getting worse. I took two of the sleeping pills that the doctor perscribed me last night, and I still didn't get any sleep. Had to call him up again today to get him to perscribe me stronger sleeping pills. Hpefully they'll at least knock me out for a few hours.

I think the whole thing stems for anxiety, despite the fact that I don't really have anything serious to worry about. I'm just worrying about little things that don't really matter. It's frustrating because in my head, I know that I don't need to be up all night worrying about incosequential things. I have a great life, I'm in love with a wonderful man, I have everything I need, so I don't really have anything I need to worry about. Still, for whatever reason, I keep on worrying anyway. It's like I have no control of my own brain. And then I can't sleep, and then I get ten times worse because I haven't had any sleep. So basically, the longer I don't sleep, the harder it is to sleep. >.<

Yeah, very much so. I just want to get better so bad, but I feel like there's nothing I can do... I really do not function well without sleep. :(

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rY5k0ZG6XcA click on this link. It's Alpha Wave music from Doctor Jeffrey Thompson. Maybe listen to this before you go to bed, preferably with headphones on.

Awh! That's pretty! ^_^

I'm so sorry to hear that. Be careful how many sleeping pills you take; that can get dangerous. I couldn't sleep last night, either, for some reason. Although I did see the Joker movie-- that was pretty good. I'm sorry about your anxieties. I have OCD so I know how that can be. When in doubt, just close your eyes. That will cause your brain to start producing Alpha brainwaves, which are associated with daydreaming and meditation. That might at least help calm you. Also make sure the temperature's not too cold, as cold temperature will make your body struggle to warm itself. And too hot goes without saying.

Ah damn, I'm sorry to hear that. Hope you can sleep better tonight.

I'd say the temperature is just about right, so no need to worry abut that. And I'll try the closing my eyes to calm myself down thing. I think it's working now. Either that or it just helps that I'm getting stuff off my chest.

Progressive relaxation is similar. You take every muscle group one by one (starting at feet or face) and individually tighten the muscles for about five seconds, then release. If you still feel tension, tighten the muscle group again for five seconds. Then move on to the next group. The idea is that flexing the muscles tires them, so they end up relaxing by default without one having to will them to relax. I've done this a few times and it does seem to work, especially if the mind is over-active.

Thanks Ogre. Those are all some really great ideas. I think I'll give those  try tonight. Either way, the sleeping tablet should knock me out for a few hours at least,

Just wanted to keep you all updated. I took one of the sleeping pills at about 10 last night and fell asleep straight away, but woke up again at 2.30 and couldn't get back to sleep.

I always feel really weird using those sleeping pills because it doesn't actually feel like you've slept. Like, you'll close your eyes and then when you wake up you'll feel like "Damn! I still can't sleep!" Then you'll look at the clock and be like, "Wait... I've been asleep for 4 hours? WTF?" Then you have to go through the agony of spending the rest of the night laying in bed, trying to get to sleep and not being able to.

That said, I guess 4 hours is still better than nothing, and I've been feeling a lot better today than I was yesterday. Really hope it gets better soon, because I'm so tired. >.<

Also, sorry about constantly repeating myself every day, but I think it just helps me to write things down and get it off my chest.

Repeat yourself all you like.  I like hearing the update, but I'm sad you only got four hours.  Sleeping is hard.

But it shouldn't be hard though. I love sleeping! I can usually sleep for hours and hours.

In cartoons, a large wooden mallet always seems to do the trick, but then you have to deal with the birds flying around your head in a circle.

In the future, you could also try different brands of sleeping pills. My mother uses sleeping pills everyday, but the only brand that works for her is a Chinese brand.

I don't know. I'm told that sleeping pills can be addictive and I don't want to get addicted to them. :(

That they are, unfortunately.

Even if you can't sleep you should still close your eyes and try to relax. That's still a form of rest.

Yeah, it's just so hard to relax because of the anxiety.

I tried listening to those brain wave sound app thingies once and I fell asleep within 5 minutes. (I was hyped up on caffeine, too.) Maybe try one of those?

I don't like asmr much, I try to focus on the words too much. But I like this guy:

https://www.youtube.com/user/EphemeralRift

I think I kind of want to focus on words though, because then my brain is thinking about the story instead of other things that make me anxious.

Well about the only thing I can suggest at this point is you're fortunate enough to have a significant other, so there's a potential physicaly activity you two could do until you exhaust yourself to a point of getting sleepy. Should help with the anxiety/stress as well.

He's right,  this physical activity with your significant other is the equivalent of running 6 miles. I don't know how bad your situation is, but 6 miles should be enough to knock anyone out, right?

Lightweight.

Well, it's a suggestion at least. :p

The only trouble with that is that being sleepy/exhausted doesn't actually have any effect on my ability to sleep. I'm already exhausted. :'(

... Yeah, it's not getting better. I think it must be at least 10 days since I slept. Maybe more, I can't really remember anything. It feels like it's been going on forever.

My doctor put me on Diazepam, and that seems to help a lot with the anxiety and calms me down a lot... But still, I just can't sleep at all. Nothing seems to work... Not sure why I'm saying this because I think that everything's already been suggested but... Yeah... I just really need sleep. :'(

Nothing makes it harder to sleep than knowing that you have to sleep, too.  Then the stakes feel higher, and sleep runs away.  I know for me when I can't sleep that's what happens.

Easy way to get sleep: Just buy some melatonin pills and down a couple

Hard way (Literally): Get someone to knock you out with a blackjack 

I used to take Melatonin pills. It was always best to take them several hours before going to bed. Otherwise, I'd be dogged tired the next morning. 

Yeah, for me melatonin works wonders for going to sleep two hours earlier than I normally would.

Try doing this, just cross your legs on your bed, put your hands on your knees and just close your eyes, and be like that for five to ten minutes. Don't squirm around and just lose yourself in the environment. Then just imagine your body falling down on your soft bed and your head being cradled by your pillow. Keep focusing on your breathing throughout and just leave your muscles loose. Then imagine your mind going into a deep blackness and nothingness for infinity. 

If this still does not work, what I usually do is just have a huge bowl of yogurt, until I'm stuffed (non-flavored, otherwise the sugar rush will worsen your condition), and then imagine the above steps.

Nothing new to add except that I've gotten worse rather than better. The doctor has changed around my pills but while the sleeping tablets do make me sleep for a little while, the combination of pills I'm on seems to make me more tired, not less. I'm basically a zombie right now.

I've put patreon on pause last month because since the insomnia hit, I've not been able to get any writing done and I obviously don't want to charge people while I'm not writing. Will probably put it on pause next month too, but will wait closer to the end of the month incase I miraculously get better and get a whole bunch of writing done.

Now for my crazy person rant of the day, which is that, since the insomnia hit, I've become extremely depressed, anxious and emotional (it's actually worse than it was last time, if that's possible to believe. Last time I was a lot more manic. Felt kind of like being bi-polar, so I was very up and down. This time it's just down.) Either way, looking through threads on CYS has made me feel super bad and guilty all the time. I keep writing out several paragraph long rants and then deleting them because I realize how crazy they are. (I know this post makes me sound crazy enough, but it's actually really, really tame compared to the rants I typed out before.)

I don't know what to say now. This is another part where I had a big paragraph typed out and then deleted it because it was stupid and self-rightous and crazy, but I guess all I want to say is that the world is a shitty, shitty place and everybody is going through their own horrible shit. I know I've dealt with enough shit of my own, but then some people have been through shit that's more horrible than I can even imagine. (I went to a SOBS meeting on Tuesday (Survivors Of Berevement by Suicide) and there was one woman at the meeting who had a husband and three sons. One of her sons committed suicide and following that, both her husband and another one of her sons committed suicide within the next 18 months. I have no idea how the fuck a person can go on when life is that unfair.)

Anyway, most people keep all the shit they've been through bottled up and don't even talk about it. I don't even know what I'm saying. I guess what I'm saying is that everybody can make the world a better place if we all were a bit kinder to one another (which is pretty rich coming from me, but still.) Not sure why I'm saying this exactly except that my brain is completely fucked up. Hopefully I'll be back to normal soon and not talking like a crazy person and not typing out several paragraph long rants that I just end up deleting. Either way, I'll post this one because reading through it all, it is by far the least crazy. :p

Avery, I wish I coul think of some better advice to give you. I sometimes suffer from insomnia, too, but it's not on level of yours. I guess all I can say is avoid caffeine and sugar and try not have any big meals before going to bed. Also, try not to read or do anything that is concentration-intensive. If you rest with your eyes closed, that should help your brain generate alpha waves.

Thank you both. Yeah, definitely something that's beyond any advice that anyone can give and definitely the symptom of a larger problem. The trouble is that, at this point, I don't actually know what the problem is, so I don't know how to fix it. Probably the result of a bunch of different things. Either way, I think it's just a case of waiting for the medication to do what it's supposed to do, and if the dosage/medication is wrong, then switch it up until it starts working.

Either way, thank you everyone for being so kind and supportive. There isn't anything anyone can do, but I'm really grateful for all the support you've been giving me. It really means a lot.

Thanks Ogre. When I finally do get better, I'll come back and let everyone know. ^_^

Hey, you might call yourself a crazy person but it's so important for you to keep reaching out for help. You're doing the most sane thing you can do for yourself, because depression really robs us of our perspective; which we need in order to figure out where we're at, and where to go. All those support groups are there to aid you in exactly that. Like you said, some keep everything bottled up. Maybe they're afraid of being vulnerable, or making things worse. But trying to contend with the problems of mental health alone actually leaves people at their most vulnerable. I'm really worried about all the other issues that might come with insomnia. Please don't go it alone (and remember the antidepressants).

Have you considered reading http://chooseyourstory.com/story/neon-genesis-evangelion? It's great for whenever I need to fall asleep quickly

Sorry. I just now noticed this thread.

I've been an insomniac for a couple decades now. Both sleeping and pain pills don't agree with me and I end up seriously considering ways of opting out. That's not who I am, though, so I steer completely away from them nowadays. I have taken an aspirin shortly before going to bed after it was recommended to me, but I couldn't tell if it had any effect.

I don't know if anyone else has mention this, but I find that just dragging myself out of bed and doing some sort of heavy labor seems to help with the following night. Maybe taking a brisk walk a few hours before bed might help? Or just rearranging a few heavy pieces of furniture might work, too.

I also have less trouble in the Spring after doing some heavy gardening prep. I don't know if that's an option for you, but there may be something similar you could try.

Anyway, I hope it gets better or, at least, not any worse.

Hi guys. Really wish I had some better news but I'm afraid I've gotten a lot worse and may need to go into hospital for awhile. I've temporarily shut down my patreon page because I don't know how long I might be gone for and I obviously don't want people to be charged while I'm away.

Just want to thank everyone for being so kind to me and really hope I'm back soon and feeling a lot better and ready to start writing again.

Damn, sorry to hear. Best of luck with the hospitalization... it's definitely better to sign yourself in than go involuntarily, in the variety of ways that can go down. But yeah, I've generally had good experiences during my hospitalizations, and I hope you do too.

Your contributions here are greatly missed. I hope you get to the bottom of all this quickly.

That sucks all the way around.

You'll always have an internet home here of course.

I hope you get better soon Briar, we'll miss you. 

Hi guys. Sorry I've been gone so long. I actually got out of hospital over a month ago. Not really sure why I delayed so long on coming back. I just kept putting it off. Either way, thank you all for being so nice, I've been doing a lot better. Definitely been catching up on lost sleep. Still not back to my old self but definitely a lot better than I was before.

Glad to hear you're doing better at least.

We still have your sleeping internet body in the Discord, you were keeping Undr's corpse company until she suddenly got up and walked away.

I'm happy to see you're back. Take it easy.

So happy for you that you've gotten this situation settled. Hope you get back to being your old self soon! 

Glad you're back, hopefully you continue to get better.

Glad to have you back. It's good to hear you're doing better.

That's weird, I did log into discord a couple of times, but the CYS chat didn't show up in my list of servers. Not sure why. Maybe just because I haven't used it in so long?

Anyway, thanks for the warm welcome back, you guys ^_^

Glad you're out of the hospital and doing okay(ish)! I hope you feel all the way better soon.