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plz I need help.

yesterday
I'm gonna be honest, I just made this thread because I needed help and to help others if I can although I doubt I can. I just can't figure out how to do specific things like go back to the page you came from without the go back button in the top right so you can go back from a page than multiple pages lead to and the written explanations look like gibberish when I try to read them :( I already made and published my first story, A Broken Reality, but being harsh to myself and also honest it was kinda terrible and sucked a lot. I think it was a good idea, I'm just bad at this and ruined what could've been a great story. I didn't and don't even know how to space it well.

plz I need help.

yesterday
Yay :D maybe I can do this! I just figured out my original problem. In the existing page option for the links there's an previous page option that fixes that.

plz I need help.

yesterday
Ok

good talk

plz I need help.

yesterday
ty? That sounds... never mind

plz I need help.

yesterday
You're the one who wrote agent of order, right?

plz I need help.

yesterday
OMG, cool profile! That's a lot... lot... lot of trophies. At least the most I've seen on a profile.

plz I need help.

yesterday
You'll find this community is very supportive.

plz I need help.

yesterday
yay :)

plz I need help.

yesterday
earlier I was gonna read shadow of a god king or whatever the title was again but I stopped before starting when I saw the maturity level. Why are there so many of them? meh, guess people are people.

plz I need help.

yesterday
How can you raise a variable if you just get onto a page and not just if you use a link (if it's possible)? Never mind... I think I figured it out.

plz I need help.

yesterday

I mean I would say Game of Thrones is better than, say, Percy Jackson & the Olympians. More mature = more conflict for the protagonist to overcome = more sweeter victory. Also, you're allowed to have more realistic villains and trials for your characters, and often times realism enhances the struggle for the progatonists.

But of course, this is a personal preference. Sometimes you can have a great story without getting too mature. Harry Potter for example (although there are certainly some dark themes there). But I really love the show The Magicians, which is kind of a grown up version of Harry Potter. All personal preference, again. But these are some of the reasons someone might want a more mature story.

EDIT: if you're pretty young I would not recommend reading my story. It's not really kid friendly and has some distressing stuff in it. In fact, I'm pretty sure all my stuff does. Except the dragon-dick joke story, but that's obviously not appropriate for a kid either.

plz I need help.

yesterday
oh, well I don't like them very much and I can get a bit embarrassed about it sometimes. It's just my opinion, I like less mature things.

EDIT: (and I'm a kid, but I still like less mature things than my peers)

plz I need help.

yesterday
I know I should probably be patient but I'm kinda waiting for the 2nd person to rate my first story even if it isn't that good, the only person who did so far was a friend.

plz I need help.

yesterday
Also, for my 2nd story I thought I started out strong but it quickly got worse. I don't have enough text, but I don't know what to add. It's also at a rate that I think is going to quickly get boring, and I don't know what to do about that either *sigh* I really got to work on my skill

plz I need help.

yesterday
And what are EXP points used for? are they just numbers there?

plz I need help.

yesterday

did you know you can edit your previous post if no one's responded to it

plz I need help.

yesterday
XD Yummyfood left a comment on my A Broken Reality that I found halarius.

plz I need help.

yesterday
oh... ty

plz I need help.

yesterday
You have the most important thing required of an author in my completely unqualified opinion: imagination. Another good thing is a willingness to try to describe the scene. Some authors here skip that entirely.

What you need to work on is the technical aspects of writing itself. Better use of paragraphs, keeping points of view consistent and rational, etc.

But creativity is already good, so keep nurturing that part of your writing toolbag.

plz I need help.

yesterday

Did the Magicians get better after awhile? I watched a few episodes back in '22, but I sorta got the sense the writers didn't have a clear idea as to where things were going. Maybe I was wrong though if you're comparing it to Harry Potter, which I'd say is pretty cohesive.

plz I need help.

yesterday

Is that the show where some dude got repeatedly raped by a pedo author so he's trying to destroy the world and only a group of young magicians that apparently all have sex with each other at some point can stop him?

Oh and some other girls get raped by a trickster god or something.

plz I need help.

yesterday
Yeah that's the one.

plz I need help.

14 hours ago

Yeah it didn't get better.

One weird thing they did though is they brought the pedo back and he kept trying to help sometimes with the various shit going down and nobody ever wanted his help just saying "Ew no, you're a pedo."

And he'd get pissy and storm off. Lol.

I feel like though they were setting him up to be the next major threat if there had been another season. Since there was some mention towards the end that the realm or whatever got taken over by some hostile force (again) and I had a feeling it was going to end up being the pedo author.

plz I need help.

14 hours ago
I never finished it. But that's what I always do. I like the concept though.

plz I need help.

10 hours ago
I'm writing a horror game that has nothing to do with A Broken Reality. You're a death row person you just escaped a freakish lab the US government tried to use you to make a weapon inside of. Everyone's missing, and a series of killer weapons that have intelligence are on the loose in the USA because the US government overestimated themselves and messed up. Inspo of what comes up next, anyone? IDK what to do now (please).

plz I need help.

10 hours ago
Avo? You asked for me to make an account and talk to you for smth?

plz I need help.

10 hours ago
I still don't get the fuss

plz I need help.

10 hours ago
Wow, that is really cool! Your idea is kind of amazing actually.

Some advice:

"a death row person" is generally referred to as "a prisoner on death row".

Let's see. So clearly in your story, the United States is conducting some kind of illegal experimentation. They're trying to create a weapon of some kind.

Here are some questions I would like you to answer.

1. When you close your eyes and think of this story, what kind of powers does this human weapon have? When they experimented on him/her, did they give him/her psychic powers? Fire powers? Something like that. Maybe, did they give him/her super strength? What happened to him/her?

2. Who is this person? What kind of things do they like? What do they dislike? Why are they on death row? And what's their goal, beyond just escaping from the lab?

3. I like the idea of serial killer human weapons a lot. What powers do they have? Are they evil? Do they have a reason all of the murders? Do you plan on telling us who the serial killers are right away? Or will you keep that a mystery for later?

4. What is the kind of world you're imagining? What do you think of when you see him running around. Is the story set among sleek high rises and fancy buildings? Fancy government labs and Area 51 centers? Or, is the setting a Dystopian version of the United States?

5. What's the story's turning point? Yes, he/she escaped from the lab, but what kicks the story off? What's he trying to do, and how will this set off the chain of events soon to follow?

Best of Luck!

plz I need help.

10 hours ago
Thank you! :D

plz I need help.

10 hours ago
And Bloo, yea, I already explained the site to you. I wanted your feedback on my (probably miserably bad) story A Broken Reality.

plz I need help.

10 hours ago
Is this really a different person or are you talking to yourself?

plz I need help.

10 hours ago
I'm a different person >:(

plz I need help.

10 hours ago
Bloo?

plz I need help.

10 hours ago
yea, yea whatever. I'll go read it.

plz I need help.

10 hours ago
Reminder: Mizal has necromantic powers that allow her to trace IP addresses.

plz I need help.

10 hours ago
we use the same account

plz I need help.

10 hours ago
Google hates us for it

plz I need help.

10 hours ago
Our parents. End of story.

plz I need help.

10 hours ago
Same Google account, to specify.

plz I need help.

10 hours ago
That was short. I'm gonna go play Minecraft now, hop on if you want to.

plz I need help.

10 hours ago
K bye.

plz I need help.

9 hours ago
They are twins with the same email, born 5 months from now.

In the future, their mom will be really clumsy and drop them both the exact same number of times.

plz I need help.

9 hours ago
??? What's that mean?

plz I need help.

9 hours ago
Okay, now this is a good learning opportunity. You should go and ask your mom how many times she dropped you on the head.

plz I need help.

8 hours ago
?!?!?! If I asked her a question like that, she'd probably ask if I was ok.

plz I need help.

8 hours ago
Is there a way I can share an unpublished story with someone for proofreading without showing them in person?

plz I need help.

2 hours ago
If the story is in sneak peek (the title and description will be visible on your profile) you can just copy the address and send it to them.

plz I need help.

yesterday
I mean it's the same magic school trope. More Necromancer's early portion than Harry Potter though.

plz I need help.

15 hours ago
Similar in concept, not content

plz I need help.

15 hours ago
You can search for storygames filtered by maturity rating. Or just stick to the Family Friendly section.

plz I need help.

14 hours ago
ty, Mizal. I'm rewriting A Broken Reality now because the original sucked and it isn't likely I'll be paying attention to the thread for a while.

plz I need help.

10 hours ago
That's... it? You called me to make an account and stuff just for that? You could have asked me while I was over at your place!

plz I need help.

10 hours ago
Uh... yeah? That's it?