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Damn, a thirty six hour boner? TBH, that sounds like more of an annoyance than anything.

Needed a new IC thread anyway.

I need to stop saying things. >.<

Ah, new thread. Let's put the spotlight on some of this week's more insightful comments.


Mia on 8/18/2022 for High School Romance
gay

ben on 8/18/2022 for Highschool
what the actual f**k

ben on 8/18/2022 for Love Triangle
wtf

Papertowel on 8/18/2022 for Dead Man Walking (Zombie Survival)
pog


More of you should aspire to their level.

Honestly the worst one of those is Papertowel's made up dumb shit zoomer "pog" comment.

Ben at least got better with his second attempt of spelling out "what the fuck" even if he was still too much of a faggot to not censor it.

As for Mia, well given that it was one of the Seth's games, gay was a pretty accurate descriptor.

A Very Special Choose Your Story snares another one!

WTF is this?? it's horrible Why do people like this?? You are forcing the reader to go down bad paths and in the moral of the story part you are making fun of people who go though this kind of stuff like 0/10 this REALLY bad

— Rosie on 9/12/2022 12:04:21 PM with a score of 0

Lol

This story is pretty offensive, it can get graphic and downright ruthless at times so if you don’t like that sort of humor, don’t read this story. But if you read it anyway don’t complain if you get offended, I did warn you and keep in mind it IS only a story. Also, don't bother trying to "win" either. You can't. Just heed the moral lessons you may learn.

Lol

bryce on 9/20/2022 for The Chained God
like men ngl

I'm so happy for whatever it was in this story that gave him the courage to come out to us.

Very old tsmpaul story getting some distinguished visitors!


W game my friend
-- John Cena on 9/20/2022 1:41:27 PM with a score of 20

very confused what this teachers
— Noah on 9/20/2022 1:40:52 PM with a score of 20

ok lol
— ur mom on 9/20/2022 1:18:37 PM with a score of 25


Worth noting that this 2006 story is older than all of them.

where the FUCK are the foot fetish scenes I wanted to sniff some TOES 0/10 go fuck yourself dumbass

— bagingi on 11/27/2021 11:09:24 AM with a score of 0


On Love SICK.

I could have swore I posted that one in an older IC thread.

I ctrl f'd the 4,5, and 7 ones, but couldn't find it. Sorry :(

Why not 6?

Couldn't find it on the first page. And I wasn't going to be THAT detailed for a random comment.

I mean that's the whole reason why I made this archive and pinned it to the top of this very forum.

https://chooseyourstory.com/forums/the-parlor-room/message/28349

Well, I searched all 7 of the previous ones. Couldn't find it anywhere.

I almost regret not having a thread for GOOD reviews. Mystic just wrote a 2000+ word comment on a noob story, Celicni has gotten several featured comments in a row, and Gryphon is busy with school right now but for awhile there was really cranking them out, including writing many thousands of words praising Eternal in an act of true devotion most of the rest of you peasants will never aspire to even a fraction of.

Also, as long as you're reading this, someone go click through the Drunk Explorer Inn already so it can get a rating assigned already, damn. https://chooseyourstory.com/story/the-drunk-explorer-inn

I hear and obey

Petros beat me to it but I also left a rating.

Thank you to all three of you!

TharaApples on 10/31/2022 for A Really InTeReStInG Storygame

I would rather get gang-raped like an anime girl in an eroge than read this unfunny shit again. Your mother should have swallowed instead of taking the cream-pie up her disgusting gaping hole. 1/8. I'll be back to personally take this shit down once it gets enough ratings.

Lol.

I want to point out that I was not given the chance of taking it down personally once it got enough ratings.

I read this and was hoping it would make the comments list.  I give this review an 8/8

Cyclonis on 11/4/2022 for Tales From The Basement 2

God bless CYS. That there is a place a story this funny can be published in 2022 gives me hope for humanity. If you're offended, you're probably white.

We're doing God's work folks.

It's high time the whites stop getting offended.

Thanks for the bonus!

Ford... you made me lose a bet so I will be as kind as I can in this circumstance. I honestly didn't expect much here. The title alone was enough for me to know I probably lost. The part of the bet where dignity came in? I now know that the non-existent part mostly applied to you. Cel got hit by a car. Just comparing here, a gorilla must have been using your head as a speedbag since birth.

Overall I think I gave you something like a 5 or 6 originally, but I realize that is far too generous of me, considering you almost lost me a title. If it weren't for Thara I would still be trying to gain the Wordsmith title back. **** you. You could have at least tried a little harder.

— Yummyfood on 11/4/2022 3:19:11 AM with a score of 0 for Ford's masterpiece game, whaat

To be fair it is Ford's most involved and complete feeling story yet.

Giving it anything higher than a generous and undeserved 4 is either insanity or a meme though.

I loved that comment so much, the saltiness and sheer disappointment is dripping from every word.

After the prologue, I was wondering to myself, “Why does everyone hate this story so much, it’s not that bad.” I was expecting this to be a decent guilty pleasure of a story game. Then the rest of the story started. All the kappas seemed to drop an additional sixty IQ points, landing them somewhere deep in the negative.

This is when I a realized that all of the “myth” involved was the three destination choices. These were more unfunny random type jokes.

Honestly, I would recommend just reading the prologue and writing your own ending. Ford managed to build up my expectations from zero to a nonzero amount, this disappointing me even harder than I would have otherwise. I still didn’t rank it as low as it deserves though. I guess I’m too soft.

— Petros on 11/2/2022 5:12:47 PM with a score of 0, also for ford's masterpiece.

orionshine on 11/12/2022 for It's a Boy!
I should have been able to kill myself after being raped

orionshine on 11/12/2022 for It's a Boy!
why am I a faggot

Lol.

I laughed so hard when I read it. I thought the "fruity" picture was enough of a warning on its own.

That part of my comment really hit you, huh?

Yes, the gay factor really comes at you immediately. He should not have questioned the feeling of creeping doubt that he was not in for an experience of the gay variety. This time with a wolf and all manner of creepy things.

It's really a good thing the description does not mince words, because the art and title suggest a tone that's...well, extremely gay but not disturbingly, horrifically gay.

But who reads descriptions around here. End to this day is still harvesting upset comments on AVSCYS. The new Tales from a Basement is going to have some legs on it too.

That one’s gonna be a gold mine. I distinctly remember killing myself though

Friend Zone:

Eat my cunt

— Jo on 8/12/2022 9:39:29 PM with a score of 0

Whew, glad that one's done.

It's not that I didn't like it, I really did, It's that my brain hurts. what if I wake up and this comment didn't exist? What if I wake up after the dream of waking up and the comment does exist, but I fell asleep after typing it? What if I wake up inside a phone eternally playing Candy Crush and I have to dodge the candy falling towards me? What if I wake up a vacuum cleaner!!!

10/10 the spelling mistakes are excusable because of how weird the story already is.

Yummyfood on Randomly Walk II, The epic sequel

So this is all coming from the user UserUserNameName on Petros's storygame Wrath of The Edomite.

This is a quote from the first comment that it comes up with:

.kcumhcs uoy ,retaw naelc ruoy htiw nuf evaH .ti daer thgim I ,krowemarf eht no yrots retteb a tliub uoy fI .deliaf uoy tub ,yrots tneced a etirw saw od ot dah uoy llA .etisarap ro ssenlli enrobretaw emos fo eid ylbaborp lliw I daetsni tub ,efil ym devas evah dluoc uoY .ti fo tuo gniknird eunitnoc lliw dna aedi on evah I dab ooT ?yob dab taht fo mpp eht si tahW .dnop gnidnats a fo tuo knird ot yaw ym fo tuo og ot gniog ma I ,yrots siht dna uoy etips ot tsuJ .saw ydaerla ti naht enadnum erom retaw edam yllautca uoY .daer tsuj I gniht siht rehtegot delbboc uoy ,daetsnI .gnitseretni retaw laretil ekam ot ytinutroppo eht dah uoY .lla ta yrots eht yojne t’ndid ylniatrec I ,lla ni llA

They also leave a comment that was probably taken from another storygame in the edutainment section about how it isn't entertaining or educational and final bosses and stuff like that. Probably a bot. 

Intriguing.

"Have fun with your clean water, you shmuck" lmao

Oh, I think they're having a tantrum over Petros's comment on their game.

The link for that game on both their profile and Petros' featured comment commendation isn't working for me, so I can't see what made UserUserNameName so angry

https://chooseyourstory.com/story/group-1's-stream-lab

I'll put the story back in sneak preview so even you plebs without special powers or permissions can view it. Because I am a flexible and kindly mod. 

Dunno who unpublished it.

Thank you so much! After I write a scathing review on this story, I will go and read one of yours! I really should have done it sooner than today.

If you feel so inclined. White Lie needs more reviews than Foolish!

And, rated. Thanks for the link!

You are a most benevolent mod.

Vote for me in the next best mod awards show.

I had taken it down after messaging them to make sure they intended to publish it, and if they understood that meant they were opening it up to public comments. Since it was a group project from 7th graders or something.

They never bothered to message me back but they had time to be trolling little shits I see.


Since I have a feeling this game will end up nuked, here's Petros's full comment, which was hilarious but probably also the length of the entire game, and wasted on retard children anyway:


Alright, for any readers stumbling across this thing, don’t bother. It’s an edutainment game that refuses to actually explain and educate. To the author, I will explain what I mean. Simply telling the most surface level version of the “what” of a subject does not educate me. I need at least a little “why” and “how.”

I really don’t know anything about the subject, this was a prime opportunity to genuinely educate me on something, but instead, you gave me numbers and asked whether the right one was higher or not. You didn’t even explain the terms. In short, this story completely and utterly failed to teach me anything. The little I would have learned was delivered in a way that wasn’t interesting, so I forgot it immediately. Really, what would make this better is if I drank water from a stream, not knowing if it was healthy or not and died of cholera or dysentery.

The entertainment part of education was not there. There were “boss fights,” but really, let’s be honest. They were quizzes. There was no description of what happened to the boss or any kind of fight sequence, just quizzes on which stream was healthier.

The one thing that kind of surprised me is that I was actually kind of interested when you introduced the topic. I drink out of woodland streams all the time with no real method of checking cleanliness other than the naked eye. If it’s clear, it’s good. You offered me knowledge, but gave me variables without defining what the units even were. At the risk of sounding stupid, I don’t know what ppm stands for here. My brain thinks it might be pounds per mile or pounds per meter, but those unit pairings don’t make sense (minute maybe?).


Obviously, there are no characters to speak of, but I certainly have problems with other story elements. The setting bumps around all across the globe without much rhyme or reason. The bigger issue is that of the plot. The scientist protagonist really has only one character trait: being a clumsy and worthless excuse for a scientist. What, did I not make a copy of the case notes. And why, unless this is a period piece, didn’t I put the case files on the computer?

The final issue is that the endings only had the option to return, not to end the game.

All in all, I certainly didn’t enjoy the story at all. You had the opportunity to make literal water interesting. Instead, you cobbled together this thing I just read. You actually made water more mundane than it already was. Just to spite you and this story, I am going to go out of my way to drink out of a standing pond. What is the ppm of that bad boy? Too bad I have no idea and will continue drinking out of it. You could have saved my life, but instead I will probably die of some waterborne illness or parasite. All you had to do was write a decent story, but you failed. If you built a better story on the framework, I might read it. Have fun with your clean water, you schmuck.
— Petros on 11/17/2022 12:46:31 AM with a score of 0[

Now the review is saved for posterity if the actual story-game gets nuked for some reason.

I mean, I wouldn’t do it... but there's some real loose cannons on the force.

One must blame the teachers at this point for consistently dumping their special ed students on our doorstep for their class projects.

Still, there's been good games that are still up actually.

I can’t name any at the moment... my memory.

Bloody hell that was a difficult read. >.<

Okay, I deleted both comments. One was just copying Petros's comment on their now unpublished story, and the other... meh. Now you can have this one.

 

this game is so sucky and I could've just died reading it honestly it was so cringy and bad because it did not have any stories, had so many typos, DO NOT PLAY THIS GAME!!!! It is so dumb and repulsive I didn't know if it was a garbage dump or a story. Stop making stories you stupid shmuck!!!

— UserUserNameName on 11/17/2022 2:18:20 PM with a score of 0

lol

This is gold.

Well at least they liked this story!

Lol, this made my day. At least I know my comments sometimes make an impact

Oh they made an impact for sure. I laughed so hard. Very creative and funny. Too bad it was wasted on such a crap story.

Well, ol’ UserUserNameName got me up to ten ratings, so that paid off in every way.

I won on 11/19/2022 for Dead Man Walking (Zombie Survival)
I got the end

Ah yes, THE end. Great job.

https://chooseyourstory.com/story/Doors_I

This one is attracting some weird attention from...somewhere, somehow. It's been unpublished at least a year.

Clickable link for those that are too lazy to copy and paste or are on mobile.

Thanks but you can just right click or hold and press 'open' now, it's never been easier to be lazy, get with the times.

Wow, it's getting all the easier to be lazy nowadays, I can't believe that even the age old clicky links may fade into obscurity.

THIS SUCKS! You should write about vampires
— WWEQueen11 on Eternal

Also noticing this Vodka character who has three comments on Eternal that I’ve read so far, each amusing and slightly different with no reference to having already made a comment.

I played this on the toilet
—Ryan Mickey, also on Eternal

I’m concerned about how long he must have been sitting there…

i didnt play a all
— billy bob joe on Eternal

disappaointed, the sexscene was lame,and to bdsm for my liking, not into that stuff. and it was crap that when i went to kill her he died.
— psimon, Eternal

THE WAR
— Leion on Eternal

This game is fun but a little repetitive. As always with Berka’s games great use of the Editor and images. 6/8
Now I’ll be waiting for Dungeon Stompage 2 or perhaps co-authoring and scripting Legend with EndMaster (an Elf can dream :))
—Elrond on Delve!

https://chooseyourstory.com/story/Cannibals_Roam

im hot this is s sick story bro
6049970987 this is my number im ready to smash

— daddy on 12/7/2022 3:06:06 PM with a score of 0

Kinda cheating, since I'm a mod and all, buuuut.

Farewell, My Childhood Self

Did i just sleep with a child?

— Ed Higgins on 12/7/2022 9:15:26 AM with a score of 0

I called. He was not ready to smash. Very disappointed.

Maybe he has preferences.

I've never been much of a Daddy's girl.

https://chooseyourstory.com/story/Tales_From_The_Basement

I loved this game it was a religious expirence for me, I am done being mentally handicapped and so gain joy from fictional characters who suffer more than me

— mike ox long on 12/2/2022 1:39:25 PM with a score of 0

@TrueParanormal

Saw your review of Chosen Hero. For reference, the original version of the first page that commenters were face palming just repeated what's in the description:

"A world on the cusp of disaster. Two sides on the verge of destroying each other, but there is hope. In the form of a hero. Now this will person..., will they be able to rise into the mantle of hero?"


It stayed like that for YEARS.

Damnnn, alright. It still is the worst with spelling and grammar but I didn't know it was that bad. Thanks for the contex!

H.C.Rose on 12/27/2022 for What Magic Ability Would You Have?

I made this a long time ago. I remember I ended up almost finishing a different storygame before I left the site. I can't even remember the reason. There was so much wonderful feedback I got from the community on here about this quiz, and I honestly wish I had stuck around. If I ever find the time and energy, I'll come back. The people here seem so lovely.

Yes, we are quite lovely.

audrey on 1/11/2023 for Death Song
im inprest



So am I, so am I.

Congratulations! Your Imp has evolved into... Iminprest! ^_^

We all are, really

Meanwhile...

shane on 1/11/2023 for A Confused Criminal!
bitch you suck

shane on 1/11/2023 for Bloodlines
I FUCKING HATE IT

R on 2/3/2023 for The Price of Freedom: Innocence Lost
pretty short but has good writing and storyline

PoF is my favorite microfiction too.

Sensei on 2/22/2023 for Vocab #1
This game is so fun and we can learn a lot of vocabulary!

S on 2/22/2023 for Cuban Missile Crisis
This game needs pictures and less big words

mizal on 3/25/2023 for Cocaine Cowboys
The new cult classic, Autistic and Enraged.

I would recommend this story to anyone.

ALex on 4/4/2023 for Dead Man Walking (Zombie Survival)
BRO MADE IT A HOLE MANSION OF STUFF TO READ MAKE IT SMALLER BRUH I DIDED BEACUSE ITS HARD TO DECIDE MAKE IT EASIER


Alex has....changed.

I can't believe Alex dided. That's so sad!

BRUH

lemonteacakes on 4/4/2023 for Sweet Cinnamon
as the creator of this story i rate it a 0/8. but i picked the reeses option just because

lemonteacakes on 4/4/2023 for Sweet Cinnamon
hihi ratibg this aagain

lemonteacakes on 4/4/2023 for Sweet Cinnamon
this story sucks LMAO


.....it hasn't been published yet but I'm glad they're able to entertain themselves this way.

mr. happy on 4/15/2023 for The Boy Who Died From Eating All His Vegetables [delete]
I think that this philosophical novel was a very nice choice for my students to read about gastronomic events. 5/8 because my student didn't really like the death of Willy and they didn't like cauliflower too. You are the reason the gene pool needs a lifeguard. Good luck with your life.

https://chooseyourstory.com/story/The_Boy_Who_Died_From_Eating_All_His_Vegetables


I am getting so many mixed messages here...

Prudence on 4/20/2023 for The Virtual Reality Game
Hi my name is Prudence. If you are an astute person you probably discovered that I have spent 48 hours reading these books because I am depressed because of my name that my mother gave me because she lost a bet. And to finish this, I am so sad, the books are over. If you want me to continue living, marry me!! And give me dog food, I like it.




.... I'm not really sure what to say about this. I think it speaks for itself.

Well, I guess I'm not a very astute person then. o.o

Blueface on 5/7/2023 for Survive the Zombies
YAY swear: good clean: boo 👎 Great story!


k

Trebobble on 5/20/2023 for Rogues
I had sex with my sister :(

This is a win, why is he frowning.

Sherlock Hound on 5/21/2023 for Where in the World Is Carmen Sandiego?
AWOOOO BOWOWOWOW!! rurururuRU! :^) ("the first good one ever! better than a bone :^)")

Alpha Bachelor on 5/21/2023 for You're the Bachelor
WOOF WOOF!! AWROOOOO!!! ("I was looking for a place to stay while my dog house was being fumigated and ")

Alpha Dog on 5/21/2023 for Get To Work, Squarepants!
BARK BARK BARK!! ("i barked i laughed i cried... 8 out of 8")

I see Corgi invited some of his buddies to the site.

Oh fuck, is this going to be a terrible sequel to the Warrior Cats saga?

And why the fuck would you go with Sherlock Hound when you could go with Sherlock Bones?

At that point, they might as well fully commit and go with Furlock Bones.

Fuck you on 5/26/2023 for Ground Zero
Bruh ths is sht

Gotta say, I've always preferred the direct retards over the faggots droning on for several paragraphs about what they didn't like. This way saves a lot more time.

The name even fits the tone of the comment.

Yes, that did add to the amusement level.

It's like he was so angry that he couldn't even be bothered to press the "i" key on his computer accurately to express his rage.

This started out okay,and had some potential.but cunegonde FUCKED IT UP. There was no plotline and the endings were shitty and abrupt. 0/10. Do Not Reccomend.

— PotterheadFFcritic on 5/29/2023 8:54:19 PM with a score of 0


Good to know even 3/8 Potter fics from 2015 can't escape the judgement of THE Potterhead fanfic critic forever.

A Message From Above

You sound insane.

— Lux_Inferni on 5/31/2023 12:55:10 PM with a score of 0

Our pasta, who art in a colander, draining be your noodles. Thy noodle come, Thy sauce be yum, on top some grated Parmesan. Give us this day, our garlic bread, …and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trample on our lawns. And lead us not into vegetarianism, but deliver us some pizza, for thine is the meatball, the noodle, and the sauce, forever and ever. R’amen.

— Stewpit on 5/31/2023 11:29:39 AM with a score of 0

Find mercy in Allah, foul infidel.

— TypewriterCat on 5/30/2023 10:13:45 PM with a score of 0

Worse than Bruce Almighty

— WizzyCat on 5/30/2023 6:49:14 PM with a score of 0

Inshallah hail Satan

— enterpride on 5/30/2023 3:35:09 PM with a score of 0

Probably my usual nepotism, but I found TCat's to be the funniest.

Nice to see Stewpit participating rather than just lurking though.

Escape From Josean

Fucking brilliant. The likes of Tolkein, Poe,and Ace would be fucking shamed by this story.

— corgi213 on 6/9/2023 7:39:48 AM with a score of 0

Interesting choice on avoiding dialogue, characterization, and coherency.

Bold choice on making the main character of an edutainment game about a historical period in Korea a mage. Also a bold creative choice in teaching me nothing about anything.

Not that there’s any point in actually critiquing this, but when did the protagonist rig up a tripwire and hide a banner in the room he was sneaking into?

It may be advisable to brush up on your language skills before your next story. One of the best ways to do that is through reading!! Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What do you See? is an excellent book in your reading level.

— Petros on 6/8/2023 5:41:32 PM with a score of 0

Damn, Petros. You really don't let-up, do you? 

Look, I didn’t suggest he hang himself even once. This is letting up by CYS standards!

Tijsdesterke on 6/24/2023 for Back to the '90s
It was a weird story. Too many 90's references. Too many hard words.

I'd chalk this comment up to a poor attempt to be funny, but with the addition of "Too many hard words" I'm going to place this one in the retard section (again)

From the username only, I can tell he's Dutch.

disgruntled lesbian on 6/30/2023 for Gay and Depressed
hey :(

I see this story has been slowly fighting its way back up to the 3 mark and is up to a 2.6

Jennifer on 7/3/2023 for A Handsome Man
My partner,Erickyoutuber is so handsome. He cared about me. He's thinking about me too. He's inside my mind. He caught my eyes.I think I love him so much. He loves me too. I hope he'll come for me and I'll wait for him. I'll always be there for him. Erick Maldonado ❤Jennifer Collins

Jennifer on 7/3/2023 for Find a Date Before it's too Late
I went to the prom with my classmates when I was 19. My friend asked me to dance with my friends. They called my name. I hope my Erickyoutuber is taking me out to the date.He takes me to the italian restaurant, the movie,walking the beach,sitting on the sand,watching the sunset, and talking Erickyoutuber puts his hand on my shoulder and he cuddled on my shoulder. He came closer to me and he kisses my lips. He holds my hand in his hand. It's very beautiful.

At this rate she should just start her own story in the Love and Dating section.

Looked it up... There is an Erickyoutuber... He's a tiny child who makes videos of himself playing with Pokemon toys. I hope she is referring to someone else. >.<

I think it might be a bot tbh

Particularly strange bot to be fapping over a five year old's youtube channel.

Hi, my name is Collins and I'm 36 years old. I played my game called Survival of War in every month. I met a Mexican guy in my game. His name is Erick Maldonado.He's in love with me. He's my lover. He sent me a flowers. I'm sure he'll help me with that.

From a "Jennifer" using the site feedback box.

Awh, he sent her a flowers? That's so romantic!

Seriously though, this bot absolutely facsinates me. Usually a bot has a very clear agenda, being to get you to clink on a link to some dodgey website... But this bot has no links. No forum posts to my knowledge. Nothing to share with the world but their undying love for Erickyoutuber.

I can't let it go... Who is this mysterious and amarous Erickyoutuber? Presumably not the random 5 year old kid that I found. Searching Erickyoutuber on youtube comes up with a tiny handful of channels, half of which are little kids and the other half don't seem to have any videos at all. Now, Erick Maldonado comes up with a few results but then, well... It's a name. Generally, if you put a first name and a last name together, you're going to find at least a handful of people. And what the fuck is Survival of War? Looking it up, I can't seem to find any games whatsoever with that name.

Looking up both Erick Maldonado and Jennifer Collins, turns out their is a Jennifer Maldonado who is married to an Erick Maldonado, but who also has a friend called Jenny Collins. Coincidence? ... Or is that bitch Jenny Collins trying to steal her friend Jennifer's man?

So, to summerise... I have no idea who the fuck this bot is or what the fuck they're trying to sell. I fear the mystery will never be solved.

I have a faint suspicion that Erickyoutuber and Jennifer may be the same person.

That would be a very articulate 5 year old.

paul and naoka!

I don't know about this interracial marriage thing...

— DylanDMorse on 6/12/2023 11:49:57 AM with a score of 0