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2023 resolutions

one month ago
Let's all be basic and try to lose 10lbs! :P



No but fr I am here at my aunt and uncle's until Jan 1st and my resolution is to find a way to move in with them. I'm lying here in bed with my phone because I can use my phone and lie in bed as long as I want without getting screamed at, and everyone just makes their own breakfast whenever they want, it's surreal that people get to actually live this way. Because my uncle is Irish my cousins have always had a happier life with more freedom and I will lose my mind or fucking kill myself if I have to go back home for good.

I am serious I'm going to find out a way to become an emancipated minor, or drop out of school and become a sidewalk artist, or fuck a black girl, or fuck a black MAN, I'm going to do whatever it takes to get disowned.

Resolution 2 I'm going to finish some storygames, it's maddening having this whole complete mythos with dozens of characters and 400 year timeline in my head and almost none of it is written down. When I go back to school I'm going to start writing again and I should probably review more games here too. There are some really good ones I've noticed this year that I really do want to read.

Resolution 3 I would like to own some guinea pigs, but that's only if I'm able to move out.

What about the rest of you?

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Resolution 4 is to find a worthier rival than EbonV upon my return. WHERE are all those contest games? Did he just die after all that bragging? Pathetic.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
If he's dead he became God and got his own planet to be smug at, he has no more time for storygames.

But good luck with your parent troubles. I suspect you will be better off just enduring it a year or two more, so don't burn your chopsticks yet.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Commended by TharaApples on 12/27/2022 6:22:16 PM
Tried to become an emancipated minor once, didn't get far but maybe your country is different idk. Not a big fan of resolutions, but I'll give it a go I guess. 1. Try to not fuck up this semester of uni like I did the first one. And by that I mean getting all A's. 2. Be more consistant. This has been a major problem for me my whole life so if I was going to pick a yearly theme, which is a concept I like better, it would be this. As far as making that as concrete as a resolution I'd say I've acomplished this as long as I am wasting less time than I was at the start of the year. 3. As far as this site goes I'm trying to write a storygame right now, so I'd say by the end of the year I have the goal of creating a storygame that is at least 6.0 rated. Which is a really high bar, but we shoot high here. 4. Get to 50 well thought out reviews. At 15 reviews currently. Going to try to incorperate reviews into my weekly habits as I start to get my life together. This winter has been all about getting things under control, starting with schoolwork, then moving onto writing and reading, then I plan to incorperate reviewing on some consistant basis into there after I get the other things solid. I did no reading or writing my first semster and wasn't on top of my schoolwork either. 5. That brings me to number 5, read more important books. I want to read some of the books that have shaped everything. Starting with Kim because of the book club, then moving onto Crime and Punishment. Dostoevsky as an author seems really intersting. Other authors I can think of right now are Orwell, Hemmingway, Faulkner, Tolstoy. Also The Gulag Archipelago seems intersting. My concrete goal of the year is to read 15 "hard" books. I was going to set it at 25, but 2 a week might be a little much. 6. Have a fucking social life. I still interacted with my closest friends from high school last semester but didn't do a good job at making friends at uni. Had some, but not nearly as close as I would've liked. I'll consider this a sucsess if I have people I hang out with outside of classes 3+ times a week at uni. 7. Start working out again. I did at the start of the semester, but that fell apart like everything else, so I want to give it another shot. I'll consider this a sucsess if I meet a weight goal that I don't want to share here by the end of the year. That's most of what comes to mind. I'll say that I feel for you with the whole parent situation, I had one of my own, though without knowing more about it it's hard to take it seriously. But benefit of the doubt, I hope you can work through that. Just keep going on and keep your eyes peeled for a chance of escape. Things that you would've never considered might just jump out at you one day, so keep living on. Anyway this was a little helpful to get solid goals on paper. Still not a fan of resolutions, particularly ones with fail conditions. Like work out twice a week or eat no sugar, since once you fail them there is no reason to keep going on. I think it's more helpful to do end of the year goals, since at least with those you can always pick them back up. Even if my first resolution doesn't exactly fit that. I might update at the end of the year with my results. I'm interested in seeing what the rest of you guy's resolutions are, though I doubt most of you make any since they are fucking stupid.

2023 resolutions

one month ago

Ah yes THAT situation. I can't believe those assholes asked you to clean a microwave.

Make cleaning microwaves your 2023 resolution.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Actually I was never asked the clean the microwave, I only complained about how nasty it was. No one else cared about it.

2023 resolutions

one month ago

Even so I clearly remember your ridiculous pissing and meaning about basic chores

Do your homework smh

2023 resolutions

one month ago
At any rate I am guessing you and Soy's "situation" are at opposite extremes. From all the many, many details and accompanying photos you shared across two servers, they were letting you sleep till 2 or 3pm and then spend the rest of the day holed up in your room as an inchaote ball of sullen rage.

Until night fell and you waddled out like a raccoon to forage the deep freeze for entire boxes of waffles to wedge over the microwave's radioactive 6 inch crust and then butter with buttered peanut butter and eat it with both hands while seated barefoot on the carpet. And I guess your little sister was doing the same.

Soy's parents are Asian which probably says enough lol. They probably stand outside the door and time his bathroom breaks.


2023 resolutions

one month ago
Mine did exactly that, 5 minutes and I was chased out of the bathroom with broomsticks(exaggeration).

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Son, how you become doctor if you taking the shits????

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Have you ever seen a doctor shit? Yeah, me neither.

2023 resolutions

one month ago

Dude if you fail to work out twice a week just get back on track the next week. What's the point of making goals and then giving up before you start because you might miss ONE day out of 365.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
That's the point, you have no excuse to drop it because you've failed your goal. Instead of a failable goal it's better to have one that you can always work towards. I've never set that as a resolution myself, only seen it commonly used as an example as a bad one.

2023 resolutions

one month ago

You said as soon as you fail there is no reason to keep going on...

Now you are literally saying the opposite 

2023 resolutions

one month ago
That was poorly worded on my part. I meant that they can feel that way, and as such it's better to not have your big resolution be so specific week by week. Regular goals like that are fine, since you need that direction of knowing you should work out twice a week, but having that as your plan for the whole year isn't the best idea. And so I don't clog up the forums I'll respond to the other post, I was never expected to do chores actually. I mean it sounds like bliss, and I mean I'm not complaining, but I mean the situation wasn't. Now that I'm out of it I don't feel fit to argue I was some abused child, it doesn't matter and a lot of that's a blur now to me anyway.

2023 resolutions

one month ago

SMH the point of goals is to have a plan to execute them.

 

 

2023 resolutions

one month ago

I wouldn't start with Dostoyevsky if I was you. My friend, an experienced reader, dropped it halfway because how it is written. Think of watching the movie Come and See for 50 hours straight. It's torture.

Perhaps choose a collection of short stories: Edgar Allen Poe or Lovecraft or something like that. Old fart language but short enough to plough through it.

 

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Ah dang that's a bummer. I think I'm still going to give it a go, since I'm really excited to read it and already checked it out of the library, but I'll make sure to keep this in mind and give myself permission to drop it. Hearing about his books is actually what started me down on this journey in the first place actually. Interestingly enough Edgar Allen Poe might be the only author that I was actually forced to read in school, I'm sure a toned down version though since I went to a country hick middle school. I was actually forced to read Falkner's Barn Burning for my current college lit class, and man was that hard to read, so that's about my level. I might've been tired at the time of reading it, it was late, but I recall it being really difficult to understand and not really getting many details out of it, so that's around my level if you've read that story.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
*Faulkner

And he sucks.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
If your main problem with "old timey language" is staying focused, try something intended to be entertaining so it doesn't have to be a complete slog for you. ("Books that changed things" doesn't really mean much, everything popular does that and the most popular things are usually pretty palatable.)

Steinbeck, Kipling, London, or Dickens are all good authors to start with, these were all activists and hugely influentual, precisely because they had an entertaining style and incredible skill to package their messages with. And they're still all approachable enough for school aged kids today.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
I don't actually think it's just the language, but more how they are written. Most stories I read are easy to get lost in, but these stories I have to use my brain and stay focused, which is a different reading style than I'm used to.

Anyway, I'll definitely check out thise authors. I've also heard of Dickins, so he might be good to read too.

2023 resolutions

one month ago

Yeah, Dickens is a pretty nice way to ease into reading that style of writing. When I was even younger than I am now, his books were really the only ones that I could stay immersed in and fully grasp what was happening. If my little ten year old brain could do it, you can do it too! :) 

Good luck on your goals btw. I think it's really great that you're actually trying to educate yourself instead of just passively shrugging it off like most people do now. Oh, and merry (insert holiday you celebrate here) and happy new year! 

2023 resolutions

one month ago
My 5th grade teacher walked us through A Christmas Carol, it probably was a teensy bit advanced for us but definitely the easiest for kids to get through, it's his only one with fantasy elements and probably the most well known story. (It helped that we watched the Disney version first.)

The mistake I made when I started reading him on my own was starting with Oliver Twist, since that's also famous enough I already knew the basic plot just from what I absorbed through references. But turns out that kid annoyed the crap out of me and to this day it's still my least favorite.

Nicholas Nickleby, David Copperfield, and Great Expectations all lived up to their great expectations and were a lot of fun the next time I dived in. (Dickens' whole thing is wildly memorable characters, and Miss Havisham and Betsey Trotwood are still GOAT. )

David Copperfield is what I'd recommend if you're going to read just one. The villain is such a repulsive little moist-palmed, insincerely ingratiating goblinoid, he's hard to forget.

A Tale of Two Cities has that absolute epic opening sentence although of course it's one of his more serious works.

Little Dorrit and Bleak House are less well known, but those have female protagonists and I enjoyed them both.


The only thing to keep in mind with Dickens is that sometimes the pacing is a little meandering, but that's because so much of his stuff was written chapter by chapter for magazines.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Ah did he write A Christmas Carol? I did read a play version of that, not sure if it was the original, in 7th grade. When I say I've never had a good english teacher, I did have a singular one in 7th grade. Love that lady, her class was really hard. She works at a library now lol. I also read Secret Garden in her class and she assigned Old Man and the Sea, which I refused to read . My friend who read it says it's the worst book he's ever read lol.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Your friend might be retarded. Old Man and the Sea is a pretty simple story, classic "man vs nature" thing but it sticks with you due to how it's just...well the old man and the sea and you're inside his head for the entire ordeal. I'd have considered it a lot more readable to modern kids than the Secret Garden honestly.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
He got the point of the story, just found it really boring. Though it was seventh grade so maybe he'd appreciate it more now. Maybe the simplicity of it just being the old man and the sea and not much else? Personally I'm not a huge fan of the man vs nature conflict type compared to the others, though that's just me. I'm just speculating as to his thoughts, I know I dropped it on the first page whereas I did get through secret garden, even if I did read half the book the night before it was due.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Idk, nothing jumps out at me as unreadable about the first page. It's all very direct and clear and immediate, aka the Hemingway style.



We only had to read Hills Like White Elephants in the 7th grade, although we had to analyze tf out of it, I'm sure your friend would've hated it more. I was pretty bored by it at the time, but outright refusing to read things for class was not something it would've occurred to me was a real option.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
I was a little shit who just didn't do things sometimes lol. We had to read it out of class, I didn't adopt the habit of not working on assignments during class until high school lol. If I were to guess I would've dropped it because I find fishing boring and this whole set up doesn't seem that interesting. Maybe now I'd keep reading, but at the time while I was reading big books they were books that hooked me. This just reads a lot different than ya fantasy or adult fantasy does, and I'm not sure why. It's not just the language, but the whole style.

2023 resolutions

one month ago

Dang, you did have a good 7th grade english teacher. Last year we read The Giver, and the majority of people thought that it was too slow, too uneventful, too much of a downer, and didn't really grasp what was happening. The people at my old school sucked. 

2023 resolutions

one month ago
The Giver was an amazing book, I recall really liking it and it not having the problem these other books have with it. Which is actually really strange now that I realize that. Maybe it's not the same type of writing as these other books, or maybe it's the fact it was written in 1993. It is YA, so there's that. I know I read the giver at least twice, and tried to read the sequel to it, but didn't get into that.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
I read Secret Garden on my own in the second grade.

Weird flex but I'll take it, there may never be another opportunity.

The Giver we read in the 5th grade. In fact I'm pretty sure I read more and better books for class in elementary school than for the entire rest of my public education.

2023 resolutions

one month ago

Maybe your first resolution should be learning to spell 'success'.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Every tankie fucktard should be forced to read The Gulag Archipelago while working 15 hour days and eating a single meal of boiled potato peels until they finish. It is an important book but it's VERY difficult to get through, and I wouldn't really compare it to those other authors who were all writing fiction, this is closer to reading Holocaust survivor accounts and it just wears you down. Definitely approach with caution if you're having issues with depression.

2023 resolutions

one month ago

Hey at least your parents keep you disciplined. It's for the better. And at least you won't wind up with any fungal microwaves.

Im kinds disgusted that Ace would encourage all this crazy talk of escaping your parents because they make you get up. Maybe there's more we don't know, but there are worse things parents could do.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Oh god no, becoming emancipated in most circumstances is an awful idea. Not only is it almost impossible, where I am, but it sets you up for failure for the rest of your life by making it a lot harder to get things like high school done. I mean oppertunities like moving in with a family memeber or doing what I did and moving out to college early. That was something that just struck me in the face that I would never have expected otherwise. I'm sure there are other safe ways to get away from your parents, so I'm just saying don't give up hope, which is more a response to the desperation that was in the original post. I'm assuming it's warrented here, because if it isn't the resolve won't hold up to any action anyway.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
I don’t usually do resolutions because they make me feel bad when I break them, but this year I’ll make an exception:

Recently, I’ve been plagued with an urge to write. You can see that there’s nothing in my profile yet, but I’m working on it. My resolution this year, then, will be to publish a decent story. Not next year, this year. Less tomorrows and more todays.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
y u not doctor yet? u make resolution to be doctor now

2023 resolutions

one month ago

So should we be concerned that Soy's extreme option to get disowned is to get fucked by a black man?

I mean I get that Voldy mentioned it in passing during his last rant about his health, but I don't think this is an example for our impressionable members to follow.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
What I want to know is why a black man in particular. Does a black woman only count as half credit? What about Darkspawn, how much disownment is he worth?

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Whatever Green's body weight is, I'm going to bench it.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
in kg or pounds?

2023 resolutions

one month ago
It might be easiest to go with tons.

2023 resolutions

one month ago

My resolution is to actually start contributing to this site instead of just lurking around the forums and reading the occasional story. 

2023 resolutions

one month ago

Here are my 2023 CYS-related resolutions:
 

  1. Lurk less and participate more often.
  2. Write and publish the 3 storygames I have in mind for this year (bonus points if they can get featured and maintain an average rating above 7). 
  3. Write a lot more detailed reviews (and get them featured).

I'm mostly worried about the second one, but we'll see how this goes. Hopefully I won't almost-die again. Feel free to tag me non-stop or something if I appear to forget about these goals.

And Soy, I really hope your living situation improves. As long as it isn't too toxic/ dangerous/ overly unbearable, perhaps the best thing to do would be to focus on the areas of life you can control (e.g. self-development, life skills, academics, etc) until you can try and convince your parents to let you study elsewhere. Speaking from experience, living abroad/ away from home is really liberating although having this amount of freedom feels unreal sometimes.

2023 resolutions

one month ago

My resolution is just to be more consistent with my writing, reviewing, and participating around CYS and other writing websites. I keep dropping the ball with it but I know this year is going to be different because I'm gonna make it different. New job, new perspective, new opportunities! Best of luck to the rest of you with your resolutions as well! Hopefully this means I'll be around a lot more in a productive way instead of just screwing around and not writing.

2023 resolutions

28 days ago

Addendum to this: I also want to be productive enough for a mention in a season of CYS. Probably won't happen but that doesn't mean I won't try. Being consistent and productive goes hand in hand with this goal, I suppose, but definitely worth noting due to the nature of this site. (And hopefully I won't be a loser and fade away like last time)

2023 resolutions

one month ago
My New Year Resolution is to make no New Year Resolutions. I have failed already :)

2023 resolutions

one month ago
I had a plan. It involved outlining one of my novel-shaped ideas in December, so I could start writing in January.

This did not actually happen. In theory I could try to start writing with what I have. In practice, that doesn't generally end well for me. And I'm not sure the idea is the best I can do, either. I just don't have a better one yet.

So I'm going to do some daily writing exercises, and post them here in case anyone wants to play along. And... we'll see.

Also I'm going to try to lose ten pounds, because middle age is catching up with me. ^_~

2023 resolutions

one month ago
As a matter of fact I am going to lose ten pounds. Trying to get all my ducks in a row as far as health goes, I have a little less than ten months until I hit 40.

Been making vague gestures towards vegetarianism for a few months now, I don't think I'm ready to commit completely enough for an official resolution, but just not buying meat seems doable. I've been getting hit with one major expense after another since August anyhow so it's a good way to spend less money. (Related, I'm cutting back on caffeine and gonna drop sodas except for the free ones at work.)

Most of my "resolutions" are pretty nebulous really and mainly just revolve around better time management, since that has been the source of all my troubles. I'm spending a minimum of 30 minutes a day reading a real book though, and in general trying to get a better handle on the 4 hour block after every work day that I just spend in like, the twilight zone with no internal awareness of the passage of time. Avoiding screens ideal, but if I'm screwing around online it must at least be with purpose.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
I have ate a plant based diet since I was 12, it is a lot easier than some people make it out to be. One of the few things my parents don't fight me on because it is cheaper and I'm easy to cook for. I eat just steamed broccoli with rice for supper almost every day.

2023 resolutions

one month ago

Steamed broccoli with rice, that honestly sounds very bland.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
I guess it's all a matter of what you're used to, but goddamn, if the Dutch are calling your food bland...

2023 resolutions

one month ago

I want to go up a grade bouldering and publish three storygames 

2023 resolutions

one month ago
I should probably also resolve to actually start answering messages I get here more often.

I think I must have some psychological avoidance of my laptop, the place where I do big types and think about talking about trying to write. I can just circle that bitch all day.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
I was mostly just venting by the way, I'm not going to leave home yet or do anything too crazy. It just becomes harder to put up with things the closer I get to freedom. I'll be moving in with some other family for college so at least that much is guaranteed.

Obviously I realize there are parents out there a lot worse than mine, but it's smothering never having any time in your own head and feeling like you always have to perform for the expectations of others. It's not a matter of doing well or getting more organizing or studying harder, I learned a long time ago that's no point they'll ever be satisfied and perfecting one task only leads to having more piled on. My having any time to think or be myself at all is a thing they work to prevent, always, and it doesn't make any sense especially when I see they don't do this to my sisters. (Which I'm relieved of for their sakes.) Being yelled at and forced out of bed at 7am even on a Sunday for instance even when I make a point of having everything else done the day before. Just always being watched for any mistake is getting harder and harder to deal with, it just makes me feel jittery and almost sick and I just want to not have this kind of attention on me constantly while doing the most basic things.

I'm typing this now because I snuck my phone into the bathroom, usually the morning when I brush my teeth is the best time for catching up on things online. Later after church we're going to the groceries so I'll be able to get away a bit then too. But the thing is I'm almost an adult and WHY am I having to do this?


(I don't really expect answers, I'm just venting again.)

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Sounds like you may just be a classic introvert with a need to spend time alone and away from the scrutiny of others to really feel like yourself, I think a lot of us can relate to that. Being a teenager is usually stressful enough even when there's not some weird family situation making it worse. Unfortunately most families are weird and yours seem like control freaks. Just sticking it out is the best course of action though and I'm glad you've realized that. The majority of your life is ahead of you, and things don't seem bad enough that you need to be in any rush to get there. There are likely things you'll miss about having people you can rely on cook for you and pay for all your shit later on even if the warm cuddly family feelings are not there.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
I can confirm. Dispite not feeling the "warm cuddly family feelings" ever since I started living at college it has been kind of scary thinking about the beyond. I mean I have everything payed for by the school, and am guarrenteed to have tutiton, food, and housing covered for 4 years after I graduate from my high school, it's still scary knowing that once I graduate from high school I won't have anywhere to go in the winter or summer, that I'll have to manage on my own. And I might be in the most secure position you can ask for when moving out, free everything for 4 years as long as I stay in college. I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have that. So yeah, having the whole safety net of people who have to take of you gone is stressful no matter the situation, because if you fuck up your on you're own.

2023 resolutions

one month ago

Maybe if you weren't such a fat little ingrate, your family would be more amenable to doing you a favour? 

2023 resolutions

one month ago
I'm the one who shunned my family, not the other way around. I've set myself up fine without any help from my family, and I'm even saving them a large amount of money, by moving out two years before I would normally. 10 months out of the year I'm not home, and I'm currently trying to get a scholarship to spend the summer in China, currently studying Chinese, so I can spend even less time at home. I'm fine by most standards, but it's still a little stressful, as I imagine leaving home for good is for anyone. Leaving home is a super common literary/mythological device for a reason.

2023 resolutions

one month ago

Your haunches will hang from a hook in an open-air meat market before you can even memorize the most rudimentary Confucian axioms. Fucking stupid disgusting lard ass. 

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Well I'm studying the language, not the philosophy. But I will admit that was a pretty funny play on things.

2023 resolutions

one month ago

Are you studying Mandarin or Cantonese? As for the writing system, are you learning simplified or traditional? 

I'm in an online high school course learning Mandarin as well!

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Mandarin and simplified. I'll be taking the third chinese college class next semester, since I made the mistake of taking a super fast program last semester that covered the first and second semester of content, which was a little too fast for me lol.

Are you using a textbook? I know I used integrated chinese level 1 part 1 last semester and am using level 1 part 2 this semster.

Also are you having to practice writing the characters? That's a hard part for me, since I have to actually be able to handwrite them lol.

2023 resolutions

one month ago

Yeah, I'm using a textbook. I forgot which one though, and I'm in the middle of science class so I can't check lol. 

I do have to practice writing them. It's the hardest part for me as well. I get languages pretty easily, but I have horrible handwriting just in general, so writing the characters is especially hard. 

2023 resolutions

one month ago
I'm awful and handwriting and languages lol. Languages is one of the things I am worst at. When it comes to math or science you study until you get the concept, which I'm better than average at picking up. But learning a language is just memorization at the start, so it's nothing more than putting in the hours and being consistant, something I'm pretty bad at. 我说话中文不好。我觉得写汉字很难。你呢?

2023 resolutions

one month ago
What is it about China specifically right now that makes you believe you in particular would enjoy it there?

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Well it was China, now they are only doing Taiwan lol. But I'd have liked to have went to China because I want to see what it really is like there. I've just been studying the language so I applied for a study abroad thing, currently in the second round of selection.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
@Will11 has lived in China for years and could probably answer some questions if you were curious. I hear he loves it!

2023 resolutions

one month ago
I don't know about "love it", "tolerate it" might be closer :D But yeah, I've been out here 9 years now and it is certainly an interesting and unique culture... kudos on learning Chinese by the way. As languages go it's a tough one and I only learnt the basics (mainly stuff relating to food and getting it) before giving up. In answer to Ace's question though 我的汉语是不好,我是不好学生。汉语是非常难!

2023 resolutions

one month ago

And for those who didn't want to translate it themselves:

Ace: I don't speak Chinese well. I find it difficult to write Chinese characters. How about you?

Will: My Chinese is not good, I am not a good student. Chinese is very difficult.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Without looking at Yummy's translation I got My (something, possibly to do with writing characters since it has han in it?) is not good. I am not a good student. (That something again) is (something) (often?) hard. I'm pretty sure you aren't supposed to say 是不好, I thought it was just 不好 or 很好,and that you weren't supposed to use 是 with adjectives, but I could be wrong lol. So what do you think about all the negeative sterotypes? China gets a really bad wrap in America, so I'm curious to know how bad it really is. E: Ah, I'm used to seeing 中文 instead of 汉语 for the Chinese language, and I haven't gotten to 非常 as a supperlative yet, just 很 and 真。

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Maybe learn English first?

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Learning ways to fact check things online without physically going to another country where bad things are happening just to see them for yourself can be useful knowledge to have sometimes. When's the trip to North Korea planned btw?

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Well the main reason I want to go to China or Taiwan is because I'm learning the language and the best way to learn a language is to take language classes in the country where that language is spoken, while being surrounded by people who speak that language. I'm not just going to visit there because "china kool." The program is funded by the department of state, so I don't feel in any real danger.

2023 resolutions

one month ago

2023 resolutions

one month ago

tl;dr yeah it's mostly fine if you're there as an exchange / expat to accrue experience, but eating imported ingredients, following local customs, and taking health risks with a surge in specific kinds of cardiovascular diseases similar to COVID does leave you in more danger if you're not taking extra precautions to watch what you say, eat, and simply be at.  culturally, the south of china is more cosmopolitan than the north and most of the inland, but the CCP pushes han superiority about as strongly as Europe pushes diversity: hard enough to create a loud minority, with the added benefit of having gov't-controlled speech to always push things in favor of their vision.

societally you're not going to see much of what's real and what's a facade until you head into the countryside.  whereas the US has a stock market propped up on inflated numbers, China has a housing market propped up on inflated numbers.  You can see entire shell cities with less than a proper skeleton crew doing less than basic maintenance, and there's constant and dramatic floods and droughts due to the excess of dams built along its rivers.  Food and water security are also affected greatly by this, and when combined with the often-mandatory lockdowns that literally lets the authorities weld people shut inside their own homes, it means that a country that shouldn't have issues of famine ends up having famine in major metropolitan zones.  Real estate is a nightmare and you're going to be confined to relatively expensive housing (not like Taiwan is so much different, being an island, but either way if your local gov't is sponsoring the trip it shouldn't be terrible).  If you youtube video something like "china weld lockdown" you should see plenty of videos discussing this sort of stuff in greater detail.

So yeah, when you're in the CCP's home turf, your gov't has relatively little in the way of giving you extra protections / leniency as it does in Taiwan, which is much more diplomatically proficient than mainland China.  You can at least say stupid shit while you're learning Mandarin, but the Taiwanese dialect may be less spoken abroad.  I have no idea if they even teach Cantonese in Taiwan to foreigners.

Personally, I think going to Taiwan might be a safer bet, particularly because of how much more competitive it is as a nation to try and train competent people -- even foreign students -- to keep its leverage in the larger scheme of things.  They're strong in the STEM field and have TSMC and UMC to prove it, as well as a competent public education system to ensure Taiwanese-born engineers are fed into those foundries.  Also because -- while it isn't as absolutely free as the US is in speech -- it beats Singapore and mainland China in being able to discuss any and all topics as needed in the region.  Being able to ask all kinds of questions, however smart or stupid, helps in that regard.  And you'lll still have internet access beyond the Great Firewall that China has, which means you'll still get to use Youtube, Google, etc. instead of CCP-sponsored websites.

China, being that much bigger of a country, can have a lot of opportunities to have hits and misses with its level of education that it may provide to you, on top of all the other non-academic related topics mentioned above.

2023 resolutions

29 days ago
Yeah, my Chinese isn’t 100% and I rarely write it. Of the two I would recommend Taiwan but if you want a more “edgy” experience China can be interesting. You are safe here (apart from the odd potentially fatal Covid strain) and everything Swiftstryker says is pretty much true I think. Dishonesty and face (shiny surface to hide the non-existent money, quality or whatever behind) is an integral part of society, even down to the family level where – in my experience – members regularly lie to each other to create the illusion of success or hide misdeeds because of the massive social expectations which contrast massively with the reality. The only real honesty you get here it between good friends.

Racism is a bit of a problem, though Chinese tend to positively discriminate towards whites and negatively towards blacks. My Chinese wife has been abused by strangers in the street for marrying a non-Chinese and I’ve been attacked in bars by drunks because of the whole white face thing. Don’t be surprised if some hotels don’t let you stay there because you are western. Homophobia can be an issue, especially in the countryside. Sexism and domestic abuse is pretty high. Otherwise, it’s lovely here.

But on the positive side the food is fantastically delicious (though I wouldn’t recommend some delicacies like cow stomachs) and there are opportunities to make a lot of money if you don’t follow the rules and engage with enthusiasm in the whole corruption thing (as a foreigner you’d need an in though, a good friendship or relationship with those Chinese involved in these activities or a lot of money to spend might do it). While I remember reading about 60% of the population live on less than $150 dollars a month there is a growing middle class and an obscenely rich 1% of party sycophants, similar to Russian oligarchs. Mostly they are closely connected to the CCP, who are increasingly out of touch with the reality of the problems most people in China have to deal with. The growing education levels of Chinese, particularly students, is really encouraging (all young people speak English now for example) and I remain optimistic that China will make positive social changes in the future though hopefully Xi won’t nuke Taiwan first.

The countryside here is beautiful (apart from the shanty-towns of poor farmers’ homes made of sheets of corrugated metal stuck together) and obviously in China there’s a lot more of it than Taiwan. The historical places are interesting and what survived the madness of Mao’s Cultural Revolution is worth seeing. The big cities (first tier) have facilities as good as the big cities in the west. Hong Kong is my favorite by a mile (so many beautiful tropical islands!) but Shenzhen has some great things and Beijing, Guangzhou, Xi’an etc are worth visiting. I’m not sure what else to say: speaking Chinese will be a huge asset in China or Taiwan but in either place you’re in for a huge culture shock. Things sometimes happen here that still surprise me.

Oh, one other thing about Covid. My friend’s grandpa recently died of Covid, went to the crematorium and had to pay extra to burn him because the crematorium can only handle 200 bodies a day and currently they have 300 and are keeping the surplus in an abandoned factory outside town. With no ambulances available I heard of one friend’s cousin loading their dead grandma into their car and driving her to the crematorium in the passenger seat. One of my student’s parents is a doctor and told me some sad cases of people who got covid, recovered, went out drinking all night for Christmas and New Year and then died of heart attacks linked to respiratory failure. Some of the youngest were 29 and 36 years old. Basically, what I’m trying to say is, all the bad stuff you read about China is true and then a whole lot more and it’s important to be aware of that if you do choose to come here.

2023 resolutions

28 days ago
Cow stomach is one thing, but where else can Ace go to grease himself up with organic freshly harvested sewer oil?

2023 resolutions

28 days ago
Thanks, you and Swift. I'll keep it all in mind when I'm (hopefully) down there. I think China itself is off the table and even if it wasn't I don't choose if I go to China and Taiwan. But the mainland is definitely a place I'd like to visit, once I know the language and all.

2023 resolutions

28 days ago

2023 resolutions

one month ago
I wasn't sure if your VPN was on, so I thought it best to stay positive!

2023 resolutions

one month ago
I have to warn my extended family of this

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Commended by mizal on 1/8/2023 4:54:46 PM

Wow, I'm really sorry you're having to go through this. But like Miz said, yeah, it's a good thing that you're deciding to stay put until college.

I know you said this was just to rant, but having been through a (tbh much, much less severe) version of what you're going through, I'm going to list a few things that's helped me. Hopefully it'll be of some use to you too.

Small Concessions & Persuasive Techniques

I recommend asking your parents for 'small concessions' where possible, in order to make your living situation more tolerable in the meantime. Maybe think of what things will make the situation easier to deal with and how you could frame these so they'll grant it? Here are some potential persuasive tips I've personally used.

Door in the face technique

Start with a big request they reject, then they will be more likely to accept a smaller request.

I actually used this on my parents lol. Back when I was in high school, I shared a room with my sister and would use a communal area as a study space. Obviously, this wasn't optimal because I was—and still am—quite uncomfortable writing when someone's watching me. I also didn't want my family to find out about CYS as they won't approve of the site culture. Once, I remember being on the verge of burnout and had to hold in tears the whole day after getting an 82% for a math test (we're the sort of family where anything below 90% is a 'fail') and I didn’t want to make the rest of my family worry. 

But back to the topic, I wanted my own personal space, so I asked them for the entire top floor (something like an attic) to be converted to my bedroom and study space. I volunteered to clean it up too. They disagreed, saying it'll be too much work to do so and probably trigger my allergies, which is when I offered the alternative of using the smaller guest bedroom. Then I managed to finally get my own study space, which was the place I wrote almost all of my storygames!

Obviously, this tip isn't very strong on its own so combine it with the next two for best results.

Manipulate core values

Alright, I admit the word 'manipulate' makes this sound a little evil, but hey, whatever it takes to regain control of your life, right?

Long story short, I read this really good book (Captivate by Vanessa Van Edwards) about social science, and most people value at least 1 of 6 core things:

  1. Love – giving affection, acceptance, and likability
  2. Service – giving support, care, and warmth to provide comfort
  3. Status – giving responsibility, praise, and titles to evoke pride
  4. Money – giving coin, currency, or tokens that have been assigned value
  5. Goods – giving tangible products, objects, or materials
  6. Information – giving advice, ideas, opinions, and teaching


Just a fyi, most people tend to give a lot of what they want to receive (kinda like love languages), so for instance, if someone performs lots of services for you they probably want to receive it too.

Now, how does this apply? Well your parents probably fall into one of these categories. In fact, I suspect it could be status (there are a number of parents who live vicariously through their children's accomplishments) but it could be something else too. Once you've identified which one your parents fall into, it's time to convince them to grant you small concessions based on their core value.

The easy way to do this is to say, "If you grant me xxx, you will get yyy." This could be as simple as 'granting me my own study space would enable me to get higher grades, which is what you’ve always wanted' (status = they get to brag to other parents about your grades) or as complex as 'enabling me to go abroad for university increases my likelihood of a high paying job and greater career prospects, which will eventually benefit you in the future' (money and goods = they will receive a comfortable future).

I analyzed my mum and decided hers was information, so I basically took her advice and lectures, and connected them to my goal. Not only did this make her feel like her information is valued, but it's also harder for her to dispute her own logic due to the reconfirmation bias. For instance, when she said I needed to take more responsibility, I connected this to the idea of having my own personal space because it'll force me to be responsible for my study area.

Note: if you aren't sure which category your parents fall into, use as many of these core values as you can to get what you want.

Play to their OCEAN personality traits

This stands for:

  1. Openness - how open someone is to new ideas and experiences
  2. Conscientiousness - how much emphasis someone puts on self-discipline and organization
  3. Extroversion - whether someone gets energy from or is drained by socializing
  4. Agreeableness - how much you value cooperation and forgiveness
  5. Neuroticism - how much you tend to worry


Search up for more definitions if you are unsure of any of these, but it is very helpful when it comes to persuading someone. Now I want you to rank both your parents in each category, assigning high, middle, and low scores (someone with high openness craves new opportunities and someone with low doesn't, etc).

The way this works is you have to tailor persuasive arguments based on this criteria. My dad is a low openness person (prefers to stick to habits and routines) while my mum is the opposite (finds new challenges exciting). So when I convinced them to let me study overseas, along with the factual arguments, I told my dad about the things which would stay the same (I'll still talk to you all very often, you'll be the first to know if anything bad happens, etc) and I told my mum about all the new, exciting opportunities (I'll be able to mature and develop, you'll be able to visit me and have cool holidays in a different country, etc). This helped both of them become more accepting of the idea.

Conscientiousness is about how structured your persuasive argument should be for your parents. If they're high in this category, that means you should set out rules and routines for the new change along with why it's important to you and them. (e.g. if you grant me x numbers of screen-time, it would serve as a motivation to study y number of hours, but in the event I go overboard you can confiscate my phone for a week). 

Extroversion… I'm not exactly sure how it relates here tbh. Maybe it's about how much time you can spend persuading them before they get annoyed by you hanging around. But judging by how they don't give you any personal space, they kinda sound like extroverts. So good luck I guess.

Agreeableness, again, I'm not entirely sure how to implement since they don't sound big on compromise, but maybe frame things like version a = you give me what I want and you get what you desire, version b = you don't give me this and the situation doesn't improve for you. This would work if they’re the type that operates from a scarcity mindset commonly found in competitive parents (in order for me to win, others have to lose or vice versa).

Lastly, I think neurotism is very important. It was for my parents at least. They're pretty neurotic people and tend to worry very easily, so I had to take apart each of their worries and tell them why these wouldn't happen, along with bombarding them with an array of back up plans for my back up plans. Play to their beliefs and what they view as ‘safe’ or ‘good’. But if they're not too neurotic and don't tend to worry much, make sure you don't bring up a ton of 'this might go wrong so I'll do this' as it'll cause them to unnecessarily worry.

Alright now you've improved your living situation a tiny bit. What's the next step?

Get A Non-Studying Hobby

I can definitely relate to 'feeling like you always have to perform for the expectations of others' to the point where I've probably somewhat internalized this belief. I mean, why else do you think I write all these large storygames? (Besides writing being fun ofc). But just remember that your achievements and failing to live up to unrealistic expectations do not define your worth, which is a lesson I'm still trying to learn if I'm being honest.

The best way to stop feeling under constant pressure is to get a relaxing hobby. Preferably something you can do for the sake of having fun, and not something you feel obliged to ‘excel’ at. You probably already know what mine is: writing. Well at first it was reading, and that was a form of escapism for me to the point where I spent entire lunch breaks in the library just devouring CYS storygames.  Then it turned into writing. This gave me the opportunity to do something solely for fun—not for the sake of pleasing anyone or living up to someone else's standard. And I loved losing myself in my writing. 

In a way, I realize it's all thanks to Mizal's noob contest, which gave me a fun reason to wake up early each morning. I had a renewed sense of purpose beyond ‘study, complete assignments, take exams, get good grades, and repeat’. That was also the first long project I ever attempted. After being forced to assume the roles of 'model student' and 'exemplary older sister', writing and being on CYS gave me the opportunity to have an identity away from all that. And fine, I'll also admit that hanging out on CYS felt like a little way of rebelling when I was younger lol.

So here's my advice: find something fun that gives your life meaning. It would really help so much, especially if you could do something that enables you to express yourself or discover your identity. This hobby would be yours alone and you do not have to share it with your family, otherwise they might set standards of 'good' and 'bad' and suck out all the fun.

Tip: the 'studying' excuse never fails. If you can establish yourself as a super hard worker and have good grades to show for it, just say you have an exam and you'll get uninterrupted free time to 'study'. I've written many storygames that way. They keep thinking I'm overworking myself haha. Oh, and if you haven't already, I definitely recommend asking for your own study room. 

Extra tip:
If you can, also try to convince them to let you use a mobile device for studying too since that gives you access to CYS and the internet. To do this, maybe join some school societies that would make them feel like you’re achieving things (e.g. prefects, debate club, or any academics-related stuff. Or maybe sports/ music stuff if you’re good at that because where I come from, it gives you access to all kinds of scholarships which parents just love). Then use the society as an excuse to get a bit of screen time, saying you have to communicate with other people for your duties in the club, and once they get used to you using your phone more and more often, eventually they will be more open to the idea of you keeping it. Show them you know how to control your phone usage and don't let it affect your grades. Another idea is to convince them of the importance of study groups, which would again give you somewhat unlimited access to a device and sometimes you might need to lie about an ‘exam’ and call a friend to vouch for you. If the situation is that dire, I mean. 

Prepare for the future

I know it seems like many things may be out of your control, but find ways to focus on the things you can.

Living on your own or with a different family for university/ college is not easy, so I recommend getting a head start. Learn to cook simple dishes, research the area you're going to be staying in, and look for courses you'll like to study. This enables you to take a bit of control over your life and gives you something to look forward to in the future. In a way, it's like a small act of rebellion too.

A lot of potential problems might arise too, and not to scare you or anything but if your parents are not the type you can discuss future issues with, then it's best to prepare contingency plans. Examples include: what to do in medical emergencies, how to handle things like finances and rent, etc. And find an external support system if you can. For instance, if you want to you could always ask CYS members for advice here, but just bear in mind there might be some trolling responses you'll have to take with a grain of salt. And it's the internet so anyone can access the information you put out.

Conclusion

I hope you can find ways to somewhat create joy in your current situation, while standing up for yourself in the things that matter using the tips I've put above. There are plenty of other persuasion techniques out there if the ones I've stated don't work (like I know a friend who made contracts with her parents saying she'll get a certain grade in exchange for a reward, but idk how helpful that'll be if the general expectation is for you to get good grades anyway). And definitely look for hobbies you can do and enjoy which will make time pass by more quickly. 

Best of luck with everything! :)

2023 resolutions

one month ago

- Make at least 2k€ a month.

That is my one and only resolution, and by God, I'm going to fucking accomplish it, one way or another. That's what a resolution should be, imo. Something that you actually have a reasonable chance of accomplishing.

Now if we're talking WISHES...

- Get to at least 90KG while still having visible abs.

- Fix my back injury even more.

- Make a lot of new friends.

- Get a certain person out of my head.

Sorry if this got too real. Let's end on a lighter note. 😀

- I suppose I'd also like to not be in a wheelchair by the time 2023 ends. Yes. I think that's a nice goal.

2023 resolutions

one month ago

Is that certain person Cricket? I'm terribly sorry that she hasn't reciprocated your affections yet. Perhaps if you tattoo your legs and back too...

2023 resolutions

one month ago
Back would be a new one for me

2023 resolutions

one month ago

If that's what it takes, then it'll have to happen.

2023 resolutions

one month ago

Why would I ever want to get Cricket out of my head?

2023 resolutions

one month ago

Well, your jaw has to start hurting eventually.

2023 resolutions

one month ago
It's me. I sent him a personal photo at his request and basically cel is very gay now.

2023 resolutions

29 days ago

WMT250117C145 

Either go bankrupt or make a fuckton of money off of this option, God help me.

2023 resolutions

28 days ago
My new resolution is to learn to make one of those fancy cactus blossom fried onion things. We had one at the Texas Roadhouse the other night and my body craves more.

2023 resolutions

28 days ago
hawt

2023 resolutions

27 days ago

My resolutions: hit my weight goal, finish this storygame, and finish reading and commenting on at least 10 notable storygames.

2023 resolutions

18 days ago
I have maintained the course on everything except getting in the habit of responding to messages. Why is that so hard to do?

How's everyone else doing on theirs, as we approach the last week of the first month?

2023 resolutions

18 days ago
My academic realted ones are going nicely, but the other ones are falling by the wayside. Currently taking 17 credit hours and a few of my classes are really scary, so I haven't really had much time to work on my other resolutions. Hoping to become better at my classes so I have time to do things like read or write reviews. The main thing I want to do that I haven't is work on my current writting project, since I get a lot of joy from it.

2023 resolutions

17 days ago

Oh yeah, those. Even the ones I made irl aren't working out so great. And I've definitly contributed to the site this month. Maybe I should actually start being productive... 

2023 resolutions

17 days ago

My metabolism is fucked up (in a good way I guess?), I'm eating upwards of 2500-3000 calories daily and still not gaining any weight. On the other hand, I'm actually fairly on-schedule with my contest entry!

2023 resolutions

16 days ago
I'm doing ok aside from my upper body now being almost as strong as my wussy ass lower body. And also the part where I might have a few very large obstacles to my financial goals.
Going to go benchpress until I feel like a chad again now.

2023 resolutions

16 days ago
Keeping up with the writing exercises. Nothing like setting the bar low to make New Year's resolutions resolve in your favor!

2023 resolutions

15 days ago

Amen to that