Forums » Newbie Central » Read Thread

This may sound a bit rude, and I could also just be shouting into a void, but why do so many people on this website seem so toxic? Everyone's trying to hurt everyone's feelings; people are so passive-aggressive all the time, and from what I've read, sometimes mods don't listen when someone's very obviously uncomfortable. I'm not trying to say this whole website is shit or anything. It's not! It's great! But all the passive-aggressive comments and even slurs on here is crazy... bleh (._.)

Thank you for reading!! <3

The internet is a tough place, people vent and say things online that they (hopefully) would never say in real-life and if anyone makes you feel uncomfortable either do not respond to them or post in other threads. Distance can be the best way to deal with disrespect so avoiding the forums entirely for a time and enjoying reading some of the very high-quality stories on here or writing your own is a valid move. Noob-baiting and insulting is a hobby for some. If a Mod doesn't respond to you try to engage in a discussion via pm with them about what is making you feel uncomfortable or just try talking to a different Mod (there are 12 of us). If you get on well with an individual site member feel free to chat to them privately but be aware of online safety aspects (don't give out personal info, don't talk to someone who says creepy things and report genuinely alarming pm's to a mod).

No worries :)

Well I don't think you'd want to PM EndMaster but yeah.

Why read forums when you can read (and hopefully rate and review) storygames? :D

Lol yeah XD

I get what you are saying, and in the not-so-distant-past I may have been wondering about the same. But having been here for some months I think I am slowly starting to understand. It's not easy to put this into words, but I will try.

First note how wholesome and supportive this site is: consider the Secret Santa, and the ton of well intentioned advice and constructive criticism that you find on here. It is rare to find this sort of positive engagement anywhere these days.

There are negative comments and I understand what you mean by slurs. But if you look beyond the words you will not find many examples of actual slurs, i.e. speech that is meant to be discriminatory. Of course, somebody will reply lol, fag to this post. If you look past the obvious, you will find it is not used in a discriminatory way.

One consequence of the rough tone is that people feel free to speak their mind. And this freedom is valuable, especially on a writing site.

Here people will tell you when you misbehave (or they feel you misbehaved) but past transgressions are also quickly forgotten. I would much rather be on a site where someone tells me to shut up when I talk to much, than on a 'cozy' site where I can be banned for saying anything political but am free to annoy everybody for years without anyboy telling me.

So yes the responses you get here are not always nice, but if you read between the lines you will find that also those can be valuable feedback. Some people are not used to that anymore , which only shows you how rare it has become.

If anything bothers you, relax, this is only one webite, you can just turn your back on it at any time. If you get emotional about some comments it must be because you care abuot the site, so you are probably getting something out of it, right?

NO! Not a text wall! ;(

Fixed

     Thanks. Anyway, I read the text wall now and it's really true, but the forgetting about past transgressions thing I don't think we're going to forgive a few people (*cough cough* Daiki and Harper *cough cough*).

Kudos for your thoughtful response here. :)

Lol, fag.

(Didn't want to disappoint!)

Thank you :)

Look Skip, as a user who's back from the dead, i have not seen much toxic. sure some mods can be toxic, but that might just be them doing stuff bcuz they wanna. and then there's that racist guy. he's pretty much being hunted by the mods as we speak

     Naz, it isn't that bad. The mods aren't that awful. They're not toxic. And what racist guy? If you mean Petros I'm pretty sure the mods are ok with him and (I think) he's not actually racist.

the guy who wanted me ripped to shreds by r*pe wolves

     Oh, him. First of all, I doubt he actually wanted that. I would say more, but I don't remember a lot about that and can't find the thread.

im pretty sure he's the one who called you a bitch

Dw, he's banned already :)

who do i alert any time i see him

Try the Active Administrators on the About Us section on the Help and Info page:

https://chooseyourstory.com/Help/AboutUs.aspx

ok

We have a ridiculous number of mods for a community this size, someone will see anyone going around shitposting on that level pretty quickly.

This is kinda one of the reasons I made this thread, haha.... You were very obviously uncomfortable with their comment, and the others kind of disregarded you from what I saw :(

The troll was banned instantly and from the other stuff they were doing didn't even seem to be specifically targeting Naz.

Problem being dealt with, nobody here is Naz's internet therapist, nor do I think it's a good idea to encourage a child to go trauma dumping on a public forum where anyone can read it including lurking trolls.

Ally stepped up to offer to talk to her more, but it seems like she passed on that anyway.

Edit: and also I might as well just say, it's pretty obvious to any admin that you're Naz's real life friend. If she's fine with things now, though I'm sure you're well meaning you don't necessarily need to jump in on her behalf, she's already proven she can speak up for herself when she wants to.

Sorry? You were replying to me, correct?

I have no idea who Naz is in real life...?

Sure.

I'm sorry, why are you being passive-aggressive with me? I was invited here by an entirely different person. I was just concerned about Naz.

Don't mind me, I am just trying to react as neutrally as possible to a child telling a pointless and obvious falsehood in a way that allows us both to easily move on from it and not make it a thing for no reason, as it is not the focus of this thread.

If you could tell me why you think Naz and I are friends in real life, it would be greatly appreciated. I'm not trying to make it a big thing, and I understand it's not the point of this thread. I am just a bit confused about why you think that and why you're so certain about it.

Also, why would I lie about something as stupid as having a friend??

I have no idea why you would do this, but since I can see your IP I know you two are in the same school district, in the same town. And from the very sparse info I've bothered to look at, you undoubtedly know everyone in your school, and also everyone in your town, and there's a non zero chance your parents are first cousins.

i know barely anyone in my school and i am friends with a friend of them

Huh...?? Why would I know everyone in my school? I would love it if you could stop assuming I'm lying, though!

I'm entirely telling the truth, and I have no idea how you want me to prove it. I have ZERO idea who Naz is in real life. I could ask the person who invited me onto this app if they know who Naz is and get back to you once I actually meet them, but I don't know Naz.

Who was the person who invited you?

Electricvoltage111

I'm pretty sure that's their username on here!

All three of you from the same class, what a coincidence! You could ask Electric to introduce you to Naz and make a new friend :)

Meant website btw not app haha...

Fine, fine, I believe you, but next time the town's only mule is pulling you up the hill to class maybe you should take a moment to learn the names of the other people in the cart.

There's like 1billion people in my school district lol /sarcasm

at this point it may be true

I can safely guarantee there are not 1 billion people in your school district. :) Unless your school district is North and South America.

it feels like there is lmao

This seems to be asked good-naturedly so I'll respond in kind.

This is primarily a writing site, and a lot of the negativity you notice comes from backlash to when a kid (usually a kid) uses it like a chatroom, or an AI user, or something worse. However, when someone comes on and reads the games and reviews them before coming into the forums for advice or recommendations, they seem to get a better response. Even then the advice may seem harsh, but if you look past it you can find some genuinely good advice. This site has improved me greatly as a writer and I'm very appreciative of that. It's taught me more than my English classes, honestly.

As for mods not listening... Well, they do. Of course there are professional ragebaiters like Thara and to a lesser, dumber degree Cel (He's just like that.) but the mods are there for you if you actually need something. Take Pedo Mod Kiel, who was banned immediately, or any of the other bad members, like Fresh(still waiting on what happened there but I can assume it involves doxxing) or COG. But genuinely, even with cases like Blister, mods like Mizal worked to find the parents or people responsible and genuinely talk it out with them. ...Even if they have their fun - like changing thread names to silly things.

I mean, you can even get second chances. Some of the most prominent site members have been banned, but so long as you don't start spamming the forums, you'll be fine.

Also, the obvious example of spamming to member is Avo. No offense, but Avo, I thought you were going to get banned with how much you were posting. Then we all found out Avo is 12, and actually wants to use the site for its intended purpose, and she's still here and has done some good for the community.

For the slurs: this is the internet, and honestly, it's going to happen. I'd rather there be slurs than over-moderation that could interfere with freedom of speech. Something like 'lol fag' when someone is being stupid isn't that awful when the user wouldn't say that in real life, not to mention that they wouldn't mean it much at all.

Anyway, this is my take. Feel free to agree, disagree, make your own opinions, and whatever, because that's the beautiful thing this site lets you do. If you don't want to stick around the forums, that's fine, they're not for everyone, but do read some storygames on your way out, yeah? They're all very good. In fact, MHD is hosting a year long contest...

Oh shoot! Sorry... ><

Don't be so hard on Cel, the mean streets of Serbia are tough on a guy who only has the power of imagination to try and make himself white and straight.

He is not a mod however, he just used to do some updates with the code.

Some of the mods have drastically different alignments, but the complicated protective ritual of "shut up and actually read" keeps anyone safe even from the Chaotic Evil ones.

Most interactions on the forum are context dependent. It's not by chance that some noob behaviors get them welcomed and some get them treated like we want them to leave.

We will never deny any user the simple childlike pleasure of calling someone else a retard, but whether that holds any weight or not depends entirely on the recipient.

Hey Skip,
Honestly, that's kind of what makes the site fun. The banter, use of gamer words, and just general vibe is kind of how we roll here. Not everyone has to partake of course. This site is an old-school Internet forum, with members who have known each other for upwards of 10 years, so it's kind of the site culture. Most people here aren't fazed with insults and banter, because you can also hit back, that's kind of the fun of it. But the mods do step in whenever there are actual creeps or things that go beyond just banter and to actual harassment.

Skip, I encourage you to stick around for a bit, and see how we roll. I think that if you maybe read a few stories, participated in some discussions, or even joined the secret Santa thread, you may find that this place isn't as toxic as you first thought.

We are glad to have new members, and I know seeing a bunch of slurs and "flame wars" break out can be a bit of a culture shock, but once you settle in, you'll see that most of the time, it's not really as bad as you originally thought.

Of course, if the site climate doesn't agree with you, then by all means, still check out the stories! You don't have to participate in the forums, and you can always read stories, and comment. And if you are really into the CYOA genre, maybe write a few! But be prepared for brutally honest feedback, people here are not going to hold back if they think your story sucks. But that's good, because then you can take that, and improve.

Also, this site is one of the most accepting and friendly places on the internet. We don't judge you based on race, creed, gender, or sexuality, we judge you if you're being an idiot. And being an idiot is a temporary state that you can always change if you want to.

Lots of other people have already given a good overview of what this site is, but I might as well give my opinion that I've formed over the years on the community here.

When I first joined this website, I first thought that this place was also a toxic hellhole, and it probably didn't help that my first post had AI as one of the main subjects, which, as you can probably tell, this community hates with a passion. I then went and flaked in a contest (Still in SHAME because of that, lol), and have slowly crawled my way up from absolute disgrace. Since then, I've learned that this is actually a great community that, while they do love to bully anyone who doesn't have more than half a brain cell and manages to royally fuck up, they also support each other. Just look at the countless contests that have happened over the years, including the one that's going on right now, and the Secret Santa that a lot of people have been doing. There are even multiple secret giftees who have been giving gifts to people other than their Secret Santa!

If I had to sum it all up in one sentence, it would be this: CYS is a community of wholesome individuals who take pleasure in defending their friends and brutally dismembering their enemies.

CYS is a community of wholesome individuals who take pleasure in defending their friends and brutally dismembering their enemies.

I want this on a business card.

Better yet, merch.

Shut up and take my money.

Okay? You can if you really want to. Don't know why you decided to commend it though

Because it's really well put, and you did a great job of summing this community up in a few words. I think what you wrote is pretty awesome!

Thanks! I kinda just wrote down what I've experienced here, lol

The funny thing is the forum isn't even as scary as it used to be, I used to just read sometimes before I had an account, I think I was about Avo's age. And there was this guy named Steve who was just absolutely relentless picking fights with everyone.

Now I enjoy the chaos even though I don't join in too often unless it's against some enragingly stupid continual spammer like Harper or Blister, or whatever was going on with the MLP fanboy. But I think the idea is you're supposed to be a more contributing member before you go in making any kind of scene.

Steve was awesome! I wish he would come back. He wrote these 2 Warhammer fics, Fear the Psyker and Warped, that are really cool.

But yeah, looking at the old forums, he was really brutal. Man, he should totally come back some time.

Steve's total and complete refusal to proofread his games would leave him struggling a bit in our current era.

I recommend reading some story-games, instead of being a faggot.

Could you provide a thorough list of the slurs you're referring to?

Nah passive aggressive is for the other faggier writing sites. Here we're just normal aggressive.

The problem with this generation is you've had the misfortune of being brought up in an overly coddling time where someone has deemed "Oh noes this is offensive!" And now there's a disease at most places where everyone has to watch out for someone's fee fees or else! 

We're not doing that here.

Now it's not really your fault but hopefully you can unlearn some of that weakness during your time here. You'll be better for it, I assure you.

In the meantime you can quietly read and rate stories or make some of your own!

The important thing though is that everyone has fun.