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Got a favorite storygame? Can't beat The Wal*Mart Game? If you're here to play storygames, this is the forum for you.

Interesting comments

4 years ago

It's always nice to read compliments people write about your stories and it's usually helpful to read criticism as well, but sometimes people leave comments on your stories that can only be described as... Interesting.

Today I found this little gem of a comment that somebody left on The Price of Freedom:

"I w0n't r8 dis a perpek 5/7. 8 is much much better. For the first time, my balls were tight, cold, and sweating all at the same time while playreading your epic story. I hope to playread the sequel ASAP 'coz you touched my tralala!" - BlurredRight

... Well it made me smile if nothing else.

So, what are the weirdest, randomest or most disturbing comments people have ever left on any of your games? ^_^

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4 years ago

Unfortunately(fortunately), a lot of the really off-the-wall ones get removed before too many people see them.

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4 years ago

Awh sad

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4 years ago
I had one a few months back on Cliche Adventures from a WC kitten that got taken down. She either read the storyline that poked fun at them, or she read the bonus 'junk' material I put in at the end of the original path... which also included some mild WC jabs. I believe the general comment ran something like...

GR8 STORY, TON OF LULZ, WOULD GO GR8 8 RATEING BUT YOU MADE FUN OF WC, HOW DARE YOU! LOL LULZ LOL, WC ARE AWESOMESSSZZ!!!!

It made me laugh, so I was sad to see it go.

Interesting comments

4 years ago

Lol. Warrior Cats fans did used to leave some interesting comments. I remember one time one of them left a comment on a game complaining that the game would've been good if it had been about Warrior Cats, but since there weren't any Warrior Cats in the game, they didn't like it and were going to rate it badly... Or something to that extent. cheeky

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4 years ago
Haha, I remember that. I mean this was a site devoted exclusively to WC stories after all. That writer was clearly at fault and deserving of a gruesome kitty attack.

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4 years ago

BlurredRight actually PMed me recently with a lot of praises, so he’s cool in my book even if one or two of his comments were a little odd at times.

But if you want some weird/random/disturbing comments just go through any of the comments section on one of mine, I get all the freaks. Lol.

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4 years ago
With how wholesome your stories are i find that hard to believe!

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4 years ago

Dat "Mardox" comment tho

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4 years ago

Hey, I'm not complaining about his comment, I'm saying it made for an interesting change cheeky

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4 years ago
Furries.

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4 years ago

Awh, I just found a fun comment on a game called Love is Fragile that the writer left in response to some of the comments that other people had left.

Don't ever comment on my stuff again unless it's good 

-- TitanOfShadows

... I think that pretty much says it all. ^_^

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4 years ago

Clearly someone can't handle criticism.

Though I have to remember that a mere few months ago this place was full of kids who think even the most sugar coated constructive criticism was "hating from a hater."

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4 years ago

Haters gonna hate, but I'm just gonna shake ^_^

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4 years ago

I remember I once PMed MadBrad200 a WHOLE FUCKING PARAGRAPH when I first started out because he left a comment on The Hunt For Cake saying that the grammar was bad. Then he kept his chill attitude, told me to spend more than a day on stories, and from that moment on I became less cringey. *shudders* Fucking twelve year old me.

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3 years ago

"No matter what you do, you'll hate your 12 year-old self." - Everyone Older than 13

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4 years ago
Hey, to his credit, it's working so far!

EDIT: Oh, never mind. Sentinel has struck!

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4 years ago

Yey ^_^

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4 years ago

I wasn't going to be so laconic in my review, but when I got to the rape ending, I realized I had a story or 20 to be writing myself, and I couldn't waste my time on this stuck-up little shits who couldn't realize how horrible that was with their own (lack of) brains.

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4 years ago

I object to that! The writer stated very specifically that the rape hurt. That's some descriptive literary skills right there ^_^

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4 years ago

Okay, joined in the fun and added my comment.

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4 years ago

You people make me happy ^_^

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4 years ago
I read that on my phone while visiting family in the hospital. I lost it while walking down the hall, and people started glancing at me funny.

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4 years ago

Bwahaha...

And people like that are why I don't sugarcoat my critiques much these days. Entitled little brats. I'd understand if was a valid argument against certain criticisms, but "you're only allowed to be nice to me about my shitty story" is honestly amusingly deluded for anyone who's been on the internet for more than five minutes--if that long. 

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3 years ago

That's so funny! This reminds me of something on Goodreads. If you're an author on Goodreads and you scroll down the comment section, they have a warning message to authors not to comment on reader reviews/comments. I haven't done it, but if you wanted to post a comment on your book or reply to someone else's, you actually have to click "Accept" on the warning box.

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4 years ago

Weird, random, or disturbing comments on stories, huh? I mostly get one of four types: positive comments ("this was good, make more" or lengthy rants), negative comments ("you suck / I hated this / you wrote this story wrong"), bug reports (damn scripting), comments obviously from someone who wasn't paying attention when they were playing the damn thing. ("It's too short!" - reader says about 1000 page game with a straight face.) 

But every so often, I get a review that's not related to the game at all, like: 

"In my heart I believe I'm a special Fox. :-)"  - EmilyGotStyle (on my quiz)

Criticisms of me that include threats of hypothetical divine vengeance:

"there is no good ending you satanist, you only want people to suffer and die if i am god i will made you suffer to made you realise how evil you are" - chan kai jun (The Other World)

Comments where I can't be totally sure if the other person is really that stupid or just not very good at trolling:

"You should make the story continue in the other world." - Sky (GOLAD)

"worse than kimchi" -- kimchi (GOLAD)

"Like - so unoriginal and junk, like my grandma can write better than this, like totally." -- StarsandSteel (GOLAD)

And then there's the "Um. What?" category, most of which were deleted in the craze of "delete every worthless comments for points," but:

"it was boo" - Cali (GOLAD)

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4 years ago

I like the fox one best ^_^

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4 years ago

Damn it, Briar, she's not a fox; she's a Fox, with a capital 'f'.

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4 years ago

Not sure you're allowed to say that about 12 year olds, even over the internet...

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4 years ago

Vulpine age of consent is six months.

I'll try to keep myself in line.

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4 years ago

No use of the words "swag" "yolo" "blazeit" or any overall message of white supremacy. Gets a whopping zero.
-- hamofpower on 3/16/2015 11:00:47 PM with a score of 0

Only further establishing that no matter how hard I try, I can't be part of the master race :(

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4 years ago

Awh, I like that one! ^_^

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4 years ago

While this story got a quite few gems, I think I'll post this one since it's from a familiar acquaintance of ours...

A Very Special Choose Your Own Story

Wow, this story was one big waste of time. Generally I like your stories, (even though in most you're an evil pyschopath) but in this one I couldn't find an ending that was even remotley good.

I guess I could give you credit for saying there was no possible way to win, but I didn't think that meant commiting suicide from depression, being electricuted to death, being shot by the police or S.W.A.T., or anything else in the catagory.

Even in Love SICK you still sort of won at the end, but that wasn't really the point, now was it? At first I tried making myself a popular football player and generally avoiding bad things when possible, but when that failed, I just sort of tried anything I could to be successful without being evil, but I guess that's all but impossible in your stories.

Once I ran out of things to do, I started being evil, but even that failed miserably. So then I tried being a GIRL, but honestly there wasn't much difference. You sure made me feel great about being a kid. Thanks a lot. I just pray my death will be quick.

-- Ryder on 1/10/2015 6:41:24 AM

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4 years ago
Ryder was upset about role-playing as a girl? Really? Huh. Would never have guessed. He must have just been salty about the lack of kittens.

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4 years ago

I figured he was upset because his character failed at everything and it was more like a reminder of his real life.

(Well that and the lack of kittens)

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4 years ago

It's a shame he got banned when he did. I'm feeling inspired to work on Farmer Joe. 

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4 years ago

He's still here as Traxil.

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4 years ago

Lol. -100 point penalty for lame plots.

http://chooseyourstory.com/user/points?username=Traxil

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4 years ago

Yeah, my penalty's much cooler.

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4 years ago
You must have been positively villainous this summer when I was away.

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4 years ago

Uh, well, it turns out starting a flame war on a Mafia thread and using JavaScript to change all instances of "Asperger's" to "magnificently large penis" is a violation of forum standards.

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4 years ago

Fucking brilliant.

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4 years ago

That is amazing.

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4 years ago
Truly a work of art.

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4 years ago

How many times would "Asperger's" show up in the forums? cheeky

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4 years ago

Quite a few, when you piss off the right people.

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4 years ago

I'm in favor of keeping this. Farking brilliant.

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4 years ago
*penalized 350+ points for cheating and flaming people - to be fair, I was flaming # @coins

Sort of a "What are you in for?" like everyone in the know has been penalized points at one time or another for something. You'd have to be in the know to know though.

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4 years ago

Does that mean I'm not in the know? I've only gotten Admin /bonuses/, not penalties. (98 points.)

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4 years ago

And what about me? Am I only semi in the know, or have I lost that knowledge?

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4 years ago
if you've gotten an admin penalty you're in the know.

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4 years ago

He's gotten a measly one of -10. Does it still count?

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4 years ago
it counts

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4 years ago

Even if it's been refunded?

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4 years ago

I would think so. Also, I've gotten 100 points taken away for "Spamming and trolling with alts".

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4 years ago

I only got a penalty once.

-2793 Admin Penalty- SATAN

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4 years ago

That makes me smile... But I'm confused how, after they gave you back 2937 points and you've only gained more points since then, how come you only have 2417 points now? Math is weird >.<

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4 years ago

I think I was around the 2000 point level when Madglee was playing around with the points to begin with. I didn’t even have 2793 points to take away.

I assume I was in the negative hundred levels when he docked the points and then later I got a few hundred point bonus when he replaced them.

I didn't really know any of this was going on until after it was already done with and a couple people PMed me about it.
 

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4 years ago
I don't recall seeing any of his stories in the New Games section recently. But that's a hilariously mean penalty title.

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4 years ago

"I'm feeling inspired to work on Farmer Joe."

Finally.

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4 years ago

Pretty sure all my comments as Slasher got deleted before I was even banned.

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4 years ago

EndMaster on 1/13/2016 for Love Is Fragile
Judging by the reaction to the comments, the story should be titled "Author's Ego is fragile" Don't ever write again unless it's good.

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4 years ago

Haha! Should've made it featured instead :P 

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4 years ago

Damn it, Berka, you give me a delete button, but it won't let me delete anything. Why must you taunt me with such power?!?

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4 years ago

Yeah haha! EndMaster PM'd me about it. I hadn't noticed that it was included. Though I wondered if it would work for anyone else.

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4 years ago

This will not be forgiven.

When I clicked on it, I was taken to a screen that said I wasn't authorized to do that.

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4 years ago

I weep for you, dear Fox.

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4 years ago

 

This story is utter shite, shat out from a rectum most horrid. Words cannot express the sheer REVULSION I feel after reading this literary turd. The universe yawns before me, and I feel my mind slipping into madness... I think I'll just close my eyes... NO! I need to finish this review, even as it tears out my soul. 

This is horrible, to re-iterate. The so-called "Variable" had no worth, as all the links that killed me killed me instantly. You clearly put no effort into this piece of shit. The sheer vulgarity of this obscene little nightmare sickens me. 

8/8, because this review helped me break my Writers Block. 

-- Malkalack on 6/21/2015 9:31:26 PM with a score of 0

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4 years ago

XD

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4 years ago

What story was that?

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4 years ago

Timescape.

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4 years ago

I think you mean "Timescape!".

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4 years ago

Awh, that's a good one ^_^

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4 years ago

Posting this one here since the story will probably be deleted.

CYS Vault

It is interesting that you are still trying to make something better than this site but what is the point of having a "vault" when everyone on here already has an account those people with a lot of free time can easily make new accounts or alts.

This site also has it's own sort of "currency" already, they're called Points and having a lot of them gives you Trophies, why create another imaginary currency that has no benefits? I've decided to give myself 500 of your Currency for this insightful analysis of mine.

It's also worth pointing out the pointlessness of having an imaginary Vault and Currency when you can have a REAL bank vault with Currency in it in the REAL world which is infinitely preferable to your imaginary or agreed-upon fantasy vault and currency. My real world currency can buy useful things like Haribo and Cola, what can your currency get me?

It's good that you have alternative views I guess but you might realize rather than trying to do your own thing you can actually thrive and be successful within the society we all live in. If you want to be like Chris McCandless and go and live outside society in a bus in Alaska (and you have my full encouragement to go and live alone in the wilderness btw) then go for it, otherwise don't push your views on other people who haven't asked for them.

Your story will probably get deleted too btw because it's not a story, it's more of a Forum Post. This is the section for creative people who write interesting things called stories with plots and characters. The place for sharing random ideas and debating over them is over in the Forum.

-- Will11 on 1/16/2016 12:09:06 AM with a score of 0

Funniest bit is where Will straight up jacked Ryder for 500 credits. True gangsta shit right there.

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4 years ago

This makes me so happy... But now I need to go and check out this vault thing and make myself late for work. All your fault sad

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4 years ago

NM, that was quick... And TBH, I think if he managed to pull off making a storygame where using your own secret password would save your own selected information, I'd be pretty impressed... But what if 2 people chose the same password? cheeky

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4 years ago

He'd probably tell one of them that they would have to change their password.

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4 years ago

WGE monetary system is way better. You can also redeem your coins for items 'n' shite.

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4 years ago

Good call EndMaster (posting that before the inevitable)!

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4 years ago

Just found a random one that was left on a game called Puff Ball Madness:

I really didn't read anything because there needs to be more dragons in life...

-- HI on 10/1/2015 8:49:05 PM

May I point out that there are no dragons mentioned in the game? cheeky

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4 years ago

Probably a reference to Puff the Magic Dragon.

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4 years ago

But dragons instantly make any story better!

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4 years ago

Got a new one today: 

FUCK YOU NOTRE DAME YOU WILL NEVER MAKE THE PLAYOFF!!!!!!

A Game of Life and Death
Jeff Long (Score of 0)
1/23/2016 9:04:32 PM

My game never mentions football. 

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4 years ago

Here's a really wacko one haha!

This game is fuckin shit you fuckin idiots you should get another job.
Bastards thickos dicheads haaaaaaaaaaaa. Oh and i got to blessed trinity and my mates were saying horrible things like
Sex and mate. Hah my mates are shane bamber aaron
hanson cloe green emely hanley kristoss. Oh yeah and
they were being racist daying packi. Oh yeah and neive were
Saying that miss gorshaw ha is soo annoying. And
phoebe bacone was saying that the librarian s a fat cow
and a snob ugly ille do what i want

-- ellie payne on 1/24/2016 8:44:32 AM with a score of 3060

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4 years ago

... I think I can hear my brain-cells popping as I try to figure out what the hell she's talking about. frown

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4 years ago

Uh, where's the translate button???
Me and my big mouth...

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4 years ago

Yeah, this jeff fool trolled a whole bunch of games with Playoff nonsense.

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4 years ago

Normally listening to idiots rambling can best be described as "time better spent otherwise" but occasionally you find a guy whose idiocy inexorably backs accidentally into genius and you might have found one of those guys... like Dutch Schlutz's last words can we mere mortals really ever understand what the hell he means? Possibly not, is there a neurosurgeon in the house when we need one? 

The Internet continues to baffle me :)

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4 years ago

Actually "genius" might be a mistaken term for "comprehensibility", this guy sounds a bit more like Vicki Pollard from Little Britain :)

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4 years ago

Ground Zero

this sucks gay. what a bunch of pussies

-- supbna on 1/29/2016 4:14:10 PM

Lol.

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4 years ago

But wouldn't the pussies make all the sucking straight?

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4 years ago

Not if it's ladies doing the sucking!

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4 years ago

A very good point. ^_^

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4 years ago

i miss sandwich porn

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4 years ago

Male currently in high school a guy did this to me three times, but the first time, in high school a guy did this to me three times, but the first time, I had was pretty much my favorite thing to eat besides a fillet from Morton's. I had sex was pretty much my favorite thing to eat besides a fillet from Morton's.
Eternal
Onion (Score of 0)
1/31/2016 1:30:07 AM

Definitely a keeper!

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4 years ago

I think your reader was either having a stoke or drunk off their ass.

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4 years ago

... I am very curious what the guy was trying to say. Something along the lines of when he was in high school, he was raped three times by a fillet from Mortons?

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4 years ago

I thought he was saying some dude raped him three times, but it was better than eating a fillet from Morton's which I guess got bumped down to his second favorite thing.

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4 years ago

I'm wondering which particular sexual act from Eternal that the male in question performed on him three times. There's a lot it could be referring to. ^_^

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4 years ago

Dead Man Walking

"My only critique is that it does pander a bit to the heterosexual white male, and does contain some annoying tropes. Non-white individuals are identified as such while white individuals are not, or "white by default," which does not add anything to the story. The wife and some of the female characters (lunch ladies, teacher, the girls) all fall into the 'Damsel in Distress' trope, and the men are more capable (for the most part) than the women (but not in all instances). Slapping the wife when she's hysterical left a poor taste in my mouth, and the way the women all look to the men to be leaders was a bit cringe-worthy. And despite my never properly getting medical attention for my injuries, (yikes, that head wound!) my character still seems more capable and fearless than the female characters. "

"I'm upset that my protagonist character is more capable than the NPCs!"

"Why do the NPCs look to my character to make decisions?!"

Dammit BZ, I demand the ability to play this game as the diffident, passive-aggressive marvel of indecision that I am. 

 the men are more capable (for the most part) than the women (but not in all instances).  

This needs less weasel words or more explanation, because it reads as though the only thing that they would have accepted was women being more capable than men in most instances.

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4 years ago

Yeah, men are pussies guys, it's just a fact. ^_^

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4 years ago

I don't remember slapping my wife in the story, I just kissed her and she died. I assume you slap her if you don't accidently kill her with zombie herpes.

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4 years ago

You didn't slap her after you kissed her? That doesn't sound like you EndMaster. surprise

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4 years ago
Lol I got that page, too.

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4 years ago

I have to agree with the commenter. I'd love a game where you're not the guy in charge, and the only option is "Do what the person in charge says". That'd be a pretty interesting game. Just have the protagonist do whatever the NPC wants. I'd give it an 8/8.

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4 years ago

That wasn't what they were really complaining about though, they were basically complaining that Berka was being an agent for the rapist patriarchy by making his protagonist another straight white dude and his story was making the world a much worse place because of it.

I don't remember the story specifically saying the protagonist was white though.

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4 years ago

No, they assumed everyone was "white by default."  

Basically, since sometimes BZ mentioned in a character's description that they were non-white, but never specifically mentioned anyone being white, the reviewer decided that meant "for anyone whose race wasn't explicitly defined, the author intended them to be assumed to be white."

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4 years ago
I mean, white by default isn't exactly wrong. White is the majority, so by extension it's the default.

Might as well complain that stories set in Britain don't constantly mention characters having a British accent or something.

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4 years ago
I'm curious what these annoying heterosexual white male tropes are.

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4 years ago

Saving the world or something similar I would imagine.

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4 years ago

Suzy's Strange Saga

Although it sure was a lot fun I have to ask: what in the seven hells deserves an 8/8 in maturity if not this? Seriously 7/8, wtf?

As Suzy I...
...got raped in detail at least a dozen times
...got murdered brutally at least as often
...took part in some very messed up incest
...literally bit off a penis entirely
...constantly whored out my sister to pedophiles
...murdered children, including by burning
...raped my own son and enjoyed it
...found close relatives dead in the most messed up conditions
...got tortured very creatively
...became a serial murderer
...etc.

Now I just want to know what exactly this is missing for the 8/8 rating? It drives me nuts.

-- aartbastiaan on 2/8/2016 12:32:01 PM with a score of 0

Okay, two things…

You never pimp your sister out to pedophiles. She’s over 18 and you just use her as bait to kill some dudes for their car.

You never rape your own son. He’s also over 18 and it’s just rough consensual three way with his father's dead body.

Glad we cleared that up.

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4 years ago

... How have I not played SSS yet? cheeky

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4 years ago

It’s pretty much right up your alley.

Not to mention Suzy’s also a blonde, so you’ll be able to immerse yourself to an even greater degree!

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4 years ago

But I promised myself I would finish the re-write of Innocence Lost before I played anymore EndMaster games. They distract me. cheeky

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4 years ago

Yeah, you fucking better.

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4 years ago
I was going to say... I didn't remember Suzy raping her son. Such blatant misinformation and lies!

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4 years ago

It's also such a stupid comment because it's obvious why it's only a 7/8. Endmaster removed the secret ending where Suzy got raped to death by a dolphin in her bathtub, and so was able to take the maturity rating down a notch. Duh.

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4 years ago

No, it's still there, If you know how to find it.

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3 years ago

...but the rest of the stuff happens?

uh...

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4 years ago

I always chuckle when I see reviews like this:

interesting, but im not a big fan of reading so many words.

A Game of Life and Death
jack (Score of 2000)
2/19/2016 1:27:34 AM

 

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4 years ago

I got a similar one recently.

Eternal

Too long..... Needs 3 paragraphs average instead of 300000000 as currently stands. I want near instant gratification and those didn't provide.
-- Arse on 2/17/2016 12:12:29 PM with a score of 0


At least his name is appropriate. Lol.

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4 years ago

"I want near instant gratification"

Oh, but don't we all?

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4 years ago
On a story I wrote about a bunch of old movie monsters getting together for a reunion... literally spelled out on page one: Someone said "I don't know why the game title name is 'Reunion'. Although there was nothing like that."

LOL.

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4 years ago
On my Ducky Park story:

"My only complaint is that I couldn't touch her boobs."

You can touch her boobs. It just depends on the path you take. But what amused me and warmed my heart a little is that touching boobs was a priority for this reader.

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4 years ago

... sorry.

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4 years ago

LOL, on Will's new story Magellan:

Lots of reading

-- dragon396 on 2/23/2016 10:37:26 PM with a score of 0

 

Reading is hard, you guys. :[  I don't know about the rest of you but I definitely don't come to a writing site for that kind of thing.

Poor Will. He published that one at the absolutely worst time possible too, right in the middle of the flood of contest stories.

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4 years ago
Words can be long and hard - and painful when you are not used to them. Or so I hear.

Yeah, I don't think Will thought that one through. Still, I find it a bit strange that a member who has been around for nearly two months would make such an odd comment. Usually, the random guest seeking his or her near instant gratification make those comments.

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4 years ago

Haha, I thought that one was kind of funny, maybe I need to provide pictures or shorter words like "cat" and "hat"... I know I published at a sucky time but mostly I can only write when I get holidays which is every six months or so...

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4 years ago

Oh, God, Will. You made the people who were playing your story game actually READ? You're a madman! A maaadmaaaan! Help, oh God, someone help, before he tries to make someone else literate again! Hide the children! 

(In seriousness, I know how it feels to be short on time. *pat*)

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4 years ago

Wow, all for AVSCYS.

Joined the Nazi gang. Guess what? The Nazis losed again. First WWII and now this.
-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 12:56:30 PM

Tried to join the Ghosts, but i had a rock throwed in my head, i was left to die in the woods and i was eaten by an bear after dying. Oh, man...
-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 1:04:56 PM

Used steroids. But i don't think a guy in steroids could rip out one guy's larnyx.
-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 1:19:05 PM

Not used steroids, became an vegetable and my parents allowed the doctors to pull the plug. Wonderful.
-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 1:24:48 PM

Tried to wipe out the school. I officially hate snipers (nah, joking).
-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 1:34:28 PM

Tried to rat out the psychos. Well, i am now worm food.
-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 1:40:19 PM

Oh man, committed suicide.
-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 1:48:02 PM

Oh, man... Sniffing glue is dangerous.
-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 1:53:03 PM

Da Hood is dangerous. Very dangerous.
-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 1:56:40 PM

Oh man, this story is fun. Well, hiding in the closet is dangerous, as is all the other things.
-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 2:04:00 PM

Gosh. STDs are dangerous. All the things in this story are dangerous (lol).
-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 2:19:47 PM

Ayy lmao... huh, girls can be really annoying sometimes.
-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 2:29:46 PM

Online gaming didn't work for me.
-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 2:45:24 PM

LARP is twisted.
-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 2:50:45 PM

I am now a cow f*cker. Pretty (nah, joking again).
-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 3:00:16 PM

I was eletrocuted. Ouch.
-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 3:03:10 PM

I’d PM this Deadly Lion and congratulate him on his persistence, but unfortunately for him he’s a filthy unperson in the eyes of CYS since he isn’t officially registered to the site.

Still, I applaud the dedication.

Interesting comments

4 years ago

Dayum.

If only he was an official citizen instead of an Untouchable.

Interesting comments

4 years ago

Yeah, I've been watching those rack up, I'm almost impressed...

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4 years ago

Ah Whoops. I was a Deadly Lion. I guess a bunch of things in this game are really dangerous. (Joking, you're great man)
-- SystemReboot_3 on 4/19/2016 11:09:04 PM


Lol. Well he’s no longer a filthy unperson. He is now a true citizen of CYStia.

Interesting comments

4 years ago

*clapping*

 

Interesting comments

4 years ago

He may be recognized!

Interesting comments

4 years ago

Ogre got a bunch of these too, on A UFO at School:

 

I was crushed by a saucer. Jeez.

-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 11:41:45 AM with a score of 0

The officer dragged me away. Aargh.

-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 11:38:20 AM with a score of 0

I was desintegrated again. These aliens love to desintegrate people.

-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 11:36:44 AM with a score of 0

Principal Jenkins blasted the aliens. Welp, at least i'm good.

-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 11:34:49 AM with a score of 0

I was absorbed by an alien. Eek.

-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 11:31:37 AM with a score of 0

Yay! I am going to space, permanently. At least i will die in a place with smooth walls.

-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 11:28:15 AM with a score of 0

Desintegrated. With the other students. Suddenly and fastly.

-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 11:24:25 AM with a score of 0

I disappeared with Mr. Stamos and the rest of the students. Pity.

-- Deadly Lion on 4/19/2016 11:22:05 AM with a score of 0

Interesting comments

4 years ago
I saw those and was disappointed I couldn't write to the author. Hey, at least he found all eight endings!

Interesting comments

4 years ago

I know it's been about a month, but I just noticed that he did some for my Hunt For Cake games.

The Hunt For Cake 1:

I am... victorious!!!

-- Deadly Lion on 4/21/2016 3:17:24 PM with a score of 0

Got the "Lie" ending. The cake was a lie.

-- Deadly Lion on 4/21/2016 3:16:11 PM with a score of 0

Got an third "Death" ending. First dying from starvation, then by a gunshot and then of a breaked neck.

-- Deadly Lion on 4/21/2016 3:13:48 PM with a score of 0

Got an third "Kicked Out" ending.

-- Deadly Lion on 4/21/2016 3:12:23 PM with a score of 0

Got an alternative "Kicked Out" ending.

-- Deadly Lion on 4/21/2016 3:11:03 PM with a score of 0

Got an alternative "Death" ending.

-- Deadly Lion on 4/21/2016 3:09:40 PM with a score of 0

Got the "Kicked Out" ending.

-- Deadly Lion on 4/21/2016 3:08:26 PM with a score of 0

Got the "Sixth Sense" ending. I am now an business tycoon named Whet Faartz. No, really (in the story, at least).

-- Deadly Lion on 4/21/2016 3:06:40 PM with a score of 0

Got the "Death" ending.

-- Deadly Lion on 4/21/2016 3:03:01 PM with a score of 0

Got the "Just a Slice" ending.

-- Deadly Lion on 4/21/2016 3:01:21 PM with a score of 0

The Hunt For Cake 2:

Well, got kicked out. This one is a longer story, but i liked more the first.

-- Deadly Lion on 4/21/2016 3:34:09 PM with a score of 0

Just an little slice. An little, little slice.

-- Deadly Lion on 4/21/2016 3:33:03 PM with a score of 0

Well, i have seen old people doing love, and a woman with her period. What a wicked mansion.

-- Deadly Lion on 4/21/2016 3:32:05 PM with a score of 0

Died from starvation.

-- Deadly Lion on 4/21/2016 3:28:16 PM with a score of 0

Got the best ending! Take that, rich "friend"!

-- Deadly Lion on 4/21/2016 3:27:25 PM with a score of 0

Died from jumping of the second floor with the cake.

-- Deadly Lion on 4/21/2016 3:24:29 PM with a score of 0

Interesting comments

4 years ago

 

So, I wish to share a weird wish-washy comment on Price of Freedom. 

 

 

 

 

TOO FREAKING SHORT!.... 

I luv dis.

-- Viper on 7/23/2015 6:49:32 AM with a score of 0

 

Interesting comments

4 years ago

I don't think that's wishy-washy at all.  (Especially since PoF isn't a short game by any means.)

The commenter loved the game and wanted it to go on even longer. They're sad it's only the first part of the story.

. . . yep, I'm right.  They gave it an 8.

Interesting comments

4 years ago

You mean to tell us that you can use your mod powers to find out what anyone rated a storygame? Oh no... how do I remove my ratings?

Interesting comments

4 years ago

Ground Zero

this was gay as fuck, i'd buy it again.

Too sad that I payed this guy 10.00 USD, and he said it was for cancer research. HE scammed the kids

One time I gave this guy mu w

-- bob on 4/24/2016 6:11:56 PM

Just another baffling comment by more driveby guest commenters.

Interesting comments

4 years ago

Well since some people were asking…

Date-rape-laws-and-prevention story

Wait a minute, in three of the possible endings you avoid rape, but you’re still friendly with the rapist which means you’re just going to potentially get date raped when you go out with him again later since he’s the one that was trying to drug the drink in the first place.

You could have had further choices where you go out with this guy again or even put into other potential dangerous situations.

As it stands there are four endings and only one of them leads to rape. Seems like a missed opportunity to make a larger story with more options to get date raped.
-- EndMaster on 4/26/2016 8:15:27 AM

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4 years ago

Maybe it wasn't even intentionally hilarious, but that last line just destroys me.

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4 years ago

Makes sense.

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4 years ago
Nice!

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4 years ago

"Seems like a missed opportunity to make a larger story with more options to get date raped."

(Insert Lenny Face Here)

I'm so sorry, I couldn't resist.

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4 years ago

Pretty cool, I liked the main character because he is an asshole, like me :D

Ground Zero
hehe xd 5/19/2016 1:00:06 AM

Glad to see I'm catering to my intended audience. yes

Interesting comments

4 years ago

Congrats to Kiel on his most recent retarded driveby commenter!

A Game of Life and Death 

Ive started reading a lot of interactive novels lately, mainly the ones from " Choice of games LLC" and I must say I'm disapointed by yours. There is no gender selection no background selection. I first wanted to play a funny popular guy. And i got bored at the first page. Since when does a popular guy get bullied? And what if I was playing an innocent schoolgirl? I would also get bullied and frames? And why does making the logical decision of going straight to your parents to explain things results in a loss? 
This novel has potential but is far from perfect in my opinion.

-- Avelange Julien on 5/22/2016 9:46:18 AM with a score of 0

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4 years ago
Those people just make me... Puke.

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4 years ago

No I agree, GOLAD sucks. I never could understand why it wouldn't let me play as a hedgehog.

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4 years ago

Fine, you caught me. I can't pretend anymore, I'm a speciest and I hate hedgehogs. Entitled, spiny little bastards, painting themselves blue, running around in their little shoes like they own the place...

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4 years ago

Them and their voices, oh god the voices. "Gotta go fast" "Cmon step it up" "Your too slow" etc. 

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3 years ago

Magic apple what everywhere..? x:

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3 years ago

Ground Zero

I hope you die you nigger. I found this game offensive to my eyes i would rather watch two girls shit on a dude than this.
-- Mason Isiah Dominguez on 7/19/2016 8:18:34 AM


Masonjar’s evil twin?

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3 years ago
Well isn't that special.

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3 years ago

Not even using proper racial slurs...

wouldn't be surprised if it was actually mason.

I kid, I kid. Just poking fun at you Mason ;)

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3 years ago

Well, I guess at least you remember my name! That's good at least!

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3 years ago

On my quiz:

Is nice. yea yeah is good no? motherloving son of a donkey's pet dingo!!!

-- DickPotato on 6/1/2016 6:45:25 PM with a score of -22

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3 years ago

Kiel. you forgot to delete the moderator things.

Interesting comments

3 years ago

Oops. I mean... >_> what moderator things? 

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3 years ago

Steve, this is the worst story on the site and you should definitely, definitely withdraw it from the contest.

Maybe replace it with something about talking cats instead. You still have about 40 hours. I believe in you.

-- mizal on 7/2/2016 1:36:09 PM with a score of 0

Interesting comments

3 years ago

That Valley High Story, but I'm more baffled by this comment.

Who brushes their teeth before eating breakfast?

Anyway, the story could use some work. I would elaborate, but it would mostly be repeating the previous comment.
-- skugga on 7/19/2016 1:51:08 AM

All people who care about their dental health do.

You’re supposed to brush your goddamn teeth when you wake up, yukmouth.

Interesting comments

3 years ago

I always heard brush after every meal. I always did it after breakfast, because that way I would have a clean mouth for the rest of the day. Never had any problems or cavities. But shit now you have made me question everything about brushing my teeth. 

Interesting comments

3 years ago

You're supposed to brush five times per day, once when you wake up, once after each meal (for a total of three), and once before you go to bed.

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3 years ago

Well, guess I need to add one then. Thanks.

Interesting comments

3 years ago

There's a such thing as overbrushing, dude. You can actually cause damage to your teeth and their structure, and five times a day is definitely overdoing it. >_> I don't know what crazy person told you to brush five times a day, but they didn't fact check. Now, if you wanna floss that often, sure. Go nuts. But if you don't want to take my word for it, here, see what a dentist has to say: http://askthedentist.com/can-you-brush-your-teeth-too-much/

(Granted, if your mouth-stank requires that much brushing to get rid of, far be it from me to stop you. :P)

Interesting comments

3 years ago
You wouldn't recommend too much flossing if you'd seen pictures of people who'd overdone it.  (It makes my skin crawl to even think about it.)

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3 years ago

There are people who overdo flossing? Most folks find it too much of a PIA (I guess?) to do often enough. I am tempted to look up pics, but... ehh, nah, that's okay.

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3 years ago
I used to hate it, but that was before floss picks.  They make it sooo much easier (not to mention that it is now a one-handed job that I could do in my sleep).

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3 years ago

(Those are the best!)

Interesting comments

3 years ago

My dentist told my to brush five times a day a few years ago. He also told me to brush in circles across my teeth so as not to make grooves in them.

I think he told me to brush that much because of my awful breath. If I miss brushing then my mouth smells like a harbour. Believe it or not though, we wouldn't really need to brush our teeth (much) if there were less sugar in our foods, because bad breath and tooth decay is caused by bacteria producing corrosive chemicals as a waste product after consuming traces of sugar left in our mouth. People's breath wouldn't smell like mint, of course, and their teeth would still be that off-white-to-banana-cream-yellow color, but they'd still be relatively healthy teeth.

Interesting comments

3 years ago

You being a special case and needing to brush that frequently not to get garbage-breath is one thing, but that doesn't mean you should tell other people to follow your regimen. That's like telling people to take the same medications you do. If they have different needs or different allergies, that could actually kill them. -_-'

Also, medical information gets updated every year. Have you actually seen him recently? (Again, Endmaster has a point, depending on what you're eating, brushing afterwards can destroy your enamel.)

:P Yeah. Processed, sugary foods (which makes up, like, 70% of the stuff in supermarkets in America) is shit, it ruins a lot more than just your teeth. A healthier diet would be nice, but people like their sweets and they like cheap, convenient supplies.

Interesting comments

3 years ago

I had always assumed that his brushing advice was in general for everyone and only realized that it probably only applied to me when you just now mentioned it. It's not like he gave me a medicated toothpaste.

And yeah, don't worry. I make it a rule not to brush my teeth within 30 minutes after I've eaten anything acidic or otherwise makes my teeth feel weird.

My problem is that there's corn syrup in everything, even things where it doesn't belong, like ranch dressing.

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3 years ago

Yeah... kinda gross, isn't it? I understand putting sugar in many things, but we put it in almost everything. >_>' 

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3 years ago

The issue here is that most people only brush their teeth once in the morning and there's some debate over whether to do it before or after you've eaten your first meal. You do it before you eat? Great. Your food is gonna taste like it's mixed with artificial mint and you're gonna walk around with food particles from breakfast in / on your teeth. You brush them afterwards, then you remove the food, leaving the clean feeling in your mouth longer and no scent of bacon on your lips--which is kind of a shame because bacon is delicious, but if you happen to cross paths with a vicious dog, he might be less inclined to chew your face off, so there's that...

Interesting comments

3 years ago

Lol, people shouldn’t be brushing once a day either. (Five is too much though) Twice or maybe three times is what is generally recommended.

Removing the bacteria that’s been marinating in your mouth overnight is more effective at preventing cavities if you do it before you're eating anything. Plus if you’re eating/drinking acidic/sugary stuff in your breakfast, brushing them after eating can actually cause abrasions on your teeth since the enamel is weakened and needs a little time to “heal.”

I dunno, I just think washing your mouth out with enough water to get the taste of toothpaste out your mouth before you eat pretty much gets rid of any possible minty bacon taste concerns. And you can always go floss if you really have an ongoing problem with getting large pieces of your breakfast stuck in your teeth.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_gqeYPlVTCE

Interesting comments

3 years ago

You misunderstood me. When I said "once in the morning," I really did mean "once in the morning," not once a day. I'm accustomed to hearing people say they brush their teeth at least twice a day, the second time being before bed, and maybe once in the middle of the day just cuz.

Yeah, you are right about that, but I'm not much for sugary or acidic breakfasts. 

Interesting comments

3 years ago
Eh, I just skip breakfast altogether.  Not only does it give me more energy (instead of sapping it for digestion), but it also allows me to think more clearly and make snap decisions more easily.  That, and it makes lunch taste oh so much better when you've gone without food for sixteen or more hours.  My morning coffee has been more than enough of an eye opener since kindergarten (granted, back then, it used to be mostly sugar and milk).

And breakfast tastes better for supper anyhow.  ;)

Interesting comments

3 years ago

You skip breakfast?! How dare you! Don't you know that [insert food & health blog here] says that breakfast is the most important meal of the day and the key to getting your chakras in balance and burns all of your fat away and turns you into the guy from Limitless and keeps you eternally young?!

Also, heyyyy a fellow person who's been on coffee since childhood! 

Interesting comments

3 years ago
Who only brushes in the morning? I've always done it at night so at least what I eat during the day is eating at my teeth all that time.

Doing it the morning leaves your teeth clean for a max of a few hours.

Besides, flossing is the real thing you need to be doing (that no one ever does, lol).

Interesting comments

3 years ago

I was wondering if I'd get misinterpreted there... anyway, please see my reply to Endmaster.

 

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3 years ago

You're meant to brush once in the morning, once in the evening, and once right before bed. At the minimum dentists recommend brushing in the morning and before you go to bed.

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3 years ago

Wait, really? 0_o

... I've brushed my teeth less than 100 times throughout my lifetime, and I don't have any problems with my teeth...

Interesting comments

3 years ago
... You will Taco.

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3 years ago

I think it's bad that I can count on one hand how many times I've brushed my teeth this year...

Anyway, the worst that's happened so far is that I got mildly bad breath. Definitely no where near as bad as some peoples from what I've been told.

Interesting comments

3 years ago
Whew. I think this guy is just trying to get featured in this thread now. On Alien Abduction (censoring added):

"this was a piece of s---. i will s--- in your moms mouth you fat bitch. you cant spell at all i could stick my dick in a bowl of alphabet soup and it would still spell better than you. is this what you do with your life i bet that high school diploma is looking good right about now"

And not just once, but it's actually posted three times.

Interesting comments

3 years ago

Oh, that's the same guy who left the 'nigger' comment on one of End's stories. Shame there's no real way to do anything to unregistered users.

Interesting comments

3 years ago

No offense, but it's kind of funny how shit is censored, but bitch and dick aren't.

 

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3 years ago

http://chooseyourstory.com/story/i'm-leaving

The best response to a quick point grabbing comment on a two minute POS story ever???

Well, that and the four PMs I've got. Seriously though, is there a way to archive a complete story? I want to save this and frame it.

edit: nvm, it was really short so I just grabbed the text and stuck it in my notepad here.

Interesting comments

3 years ago

Will someone please think of the children!?

edit: 3 published storygames (currently) in the span of 2 days (?) Have to admire the work rate though. c:

Interesting comments

3 years ago

America, we have to do something, this pampering of feefees in defiance of all reality is leading to a generation of coddled, deluded weaklings. Our children are woefully unprepared for the coming apocalypse.

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3 years ago

I want to protect this smile.

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3 years ago

Sort of odd that she got offended by your comment when she left this on A Very Special Choose Your Story:

Pretty funny but weird at the same time lol

-- Girly_Writer246 on 7/18/2016 9:21:50 PM

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3 years ago

This was horrible. Try adding some more options where it changes the story. "Instructive criticism"

-- Girly_Writer246 on 7/20/2016 8:43:03 PM

On the school story by that other little girl, which was longer and arguably a better example of a CYOA even if it was otherwise a mess.

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3 years ago

Oh, never mind. :p It seems the point was already made.

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3 years ago

OMG End, that was so mean! I feel so bad for you. You must be crying yourself to sleep every night after getting such a horrible review! crying

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3 years ago

Whew, getting slammed by the story comments lately! Here’s the best recent gem though.

This story can only have been created by a sick, twisted mind. I nearly feel pity for whoever wastes time to create such a sick piece of writing. Get a life man.

-- Endmaster is a psycho on 8/23/2016 3:41:16 PM

Interesting comments

3 years ago

Today is Karacan’s Magus: Betrayal time to shine!

I'll do a poop on it it's so bad.
-- James Culpepper on 9/21/2016 11:54:36 PM

I wish this story had more naked women and sex in it because I was horny when I played this
-- Cunt-hole on 9/22/2016 12:03:59 AM

Quite a good way to pass my time on the toilet as I suffer from chronic constipation, I usually take 30 to 40 minutes on a trip to the lavatory and having a fun and literary time on the toilet, quite exhilarating, thank you for the lovely story ??
-- Stanky pancake on 9/22/2016 12:06:16 A

Interesting comments

3 years ago

I was going through Magnus looking for comments for the mods to delete. I saw this one and wondered what was going through his head. I took out his email address.

This game sucked. Firs of all their were no Light Sabers and no two headed ferrets. What the hell was the author thinking. Everyone knows that if you want a have decent game you have to include a ferret. All the greatest games in history have had ferrets in them for example. Halo, GTA3, Sims and most importantly of all pac man. Here is a word of advice for the author don't quit your day job and if writing these games is your day job then for god's sake<br>ferrets are the future man without ferrets we wouldn't have cars or computers or even clothes. So don't be a fool, stay in school.<br>P.S If you have any complaints with my comment please send an abusive email to my address _______

-- Dick McGee on 10/19/2004 10:38:55 PM

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3 years ago

Ahaha, I wonder which buddy of his that email belonged to.

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3 years ago

I think it was actually the email account of a school in Idaho. I'm not quite sure though.

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3 years ago

This one was on the story: I’m leaving

don't write u fag u suck
-- imma give you some advice shit on 9/24/2016 3:43:50 PM


These people need to realize these gems are typically only going to stay up if they make these sorts of comments on my stories.

Interesting comments

3 years ago

Hahaha, I'd forgotten all about that story. It's still hilarious. Even more so, now.

I'm confused how they even found it, though. It's been unpublished for months, hasn't it?

Interesting comments

3 years ago

I was looking for more comments for EM to delete for The Order of the Midnight Sun. I thought I should share them before they vanish for eternity. The first and last are definitely the weirdest of this group.

*******************************

Well, this was nice to read with my friends. There was some grammatical errors, and the story was a little in the bland beginning but it was entertaining. Also, my friend says, and I quote, "Sex with fourteen year olds? Really niggah?" Also, whose entire life is driven by the premise that they'll never have sex again? 

~Love, Bears

-- Bears on 11/24/2015 7:47:34 PM with a score of 20

**********************************************************

I like pie

-- DylanDJL on 2/12/2015 8:08:39 PM with a score of 5840

*****************************

ya-ya-ya, I'm Lorde. Neat story.

-- Lorde on 10/24/2014 2:58:54 PM with a score of 4844

*****************************

I thunk that u should decrease the "long story" and focus on giving life threatening situations more for gods sake!!

-- dailyviwer on 3/18/2014 7:40:33 AM with a score of 4941

*******************************

Holy hard nipples batman that was fantastic. Is there an ending where artimus lives? I only got 2 bonings my entire life. Read this. Rigt now. And save a lot. Not too often though, also I finished this in one go. New record?

-- Jonnykill78 on 9/6/2013 12:11:26 PM with a score of 5930


 

Also, here's something that I'm surprised wasn't put here before. It's some... um, person ranting at EM and EM replying in Ground Zero.

*****************************

Lol. What? 

I don't even know what these random guest driveby commenters are even ranting about anymore. 

One of the better nonsensical rants though. Definitely a keeper.

-- EndMaster on 3/16/2016 10:44:57 PM

this story is terrible. btw, im a homosexual who volunteers their free time at homeless shelters for 6 hours a week, and an orphanage for 2. fuck you and your homophobic ass who can't write a story. btw, there is no proof that god exists, so you might as well use a fucking unicorn in your story.

-- ksjfvn on 3/16/2016 8:45:37 PM

Interesting comments

3 years ago

Eternal

Oh my.... so so good! I feel bad I neglected my husband for hours on end, several days as I read thru many different endings. I want more!

-- Jaclyn on 11/4/2016 10:35:54 PM with a score of 0

For some reason this comment sounds oddly sexual.

Interesting comments

3 years ago

whoa sweetie this is brilliant! You sure have talent! Can't wait to read part two you writing wonder! JK Rowling better watch out!

-- Will11's Aunt on 5/24/2016 7:54:42 PM

Then followed by this:

Haha, well the comment below is certainly a weird one :D But that reader is proving a point, if you want to destroy all respect as a writer get your family members to tell you that you are absolutely brilliant (I'm pretty sure that's not really one of my aunt's btw. All of my aunts are aged 60-80 and I'm not sure any of them actually know how to use a computer :P)

-- Will11 on 5/25/2016 2:59:40 AM

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3 years ago
Ahahahaha, @Will11 that's great.

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3 years ago

Yeah, I didn't understand that one - whether the person was mocking me or helping me confirm my points about how not to write. Either way I was in a business-like mood that day and it was a good comment for showing the sort of stuff people shouldn't do :P

Interesting comments

3 years ago

Underground To Canada:

I have dedicated my entire life to the Reese's name, and have loved it more than anything. I married into the Reese's family, and it is where all my pride stems from. In addition, my favorite part of the Reese's brand is the Reese's Cup. I never thought anything could ever top it-that is until now. Me and my son Reese Reese's absolutely loved this adventure, this and empty Reese's cup wrappers are the only things we bond over anymore (hes a fucking douchebag"

-- Reese's Cups on 6/10/2016 6:41:39 PM

I assume the joke is the fact that the description for the 7 rating is "even better than Reese's Cups".

Interesting comments

3 years ago

I found this funny

Funny random awesomeness

The others are being mean. this was made JUST because I was bored...

-- Crimspider on 12/2/2016 4:33:26 PM

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3 years ago

"I don't like constructive criticism! I made this JUST because I felt like putting no effort into my story!"

Also, very good comment Seto. Hopefully he/she learns from this and puts out another story worth keeping on this site.

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3 years ago

Yes. I hope they do too. I hate when people just go on this site, make a shitty story, and then say how the commenters "were being soooo mean."

It reminds me so much of the dark times...when WC storygames roamed free and these comments were everywhere...

Interesting comments

3 years ago

The Adventures of Phoebe Mcgee: Episode 1, The Lighthouse 

we got wet over this game

-- Holly Toombes and Milly Thomso on 11/10/2016 4:48:07 AM with a score of 0

Interesting comments

3 years ago

rubbish game and story
-- andre spence on 11/10/2016 4:47:01 AM with a score of 0
bored to death
-- unknown user on 11/10/2016 4:46:30 AM with a score of 0

Why on earth did the same person create 3 different names to leave 3 different comments?

Interesting comments

3 years ago

It is pretty weird, but highly amusing to say the least xD

Interesting comments

3 years ago

Meant to post this one from A Very Special Choose Your Story awhile back.

There is something quite profound about your darkness, my friend. Perhaps...perhaps, it is too late for you. My mother always said that you were doomed. She was right. The time has come for you to choose sides Endmaster. Do you side with the Light or Dark? Ancients or the Corrupt? Do you dare face the mighty wrath that have smitten so man mere Sol system humans such as yourself?

-- Love Prevails on 9/26/2016 4:33:32 PM

Interesting comments

3 years ago

I'm sure that it makes you glad to have your popularity with the moms once again confirmed.

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3 years ago

... Really? They read A Very Special Choose Your Story and weren't quite sure whether you'd "Side with Light or Dark?" Maybe you're just not trying hard enough Endmaster. In the immortal words of Mike Myers, "You’re not quite evil enough. You’re semi-evil. You’re quasi-evil. You’re the margarine of evil. You’re the Diet Coke of evil, just one calorie, not evil enough."

Not sure what the Ancients and Corrupts are though. Is this from a game that I've never heard of? cheeky

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3 years ago
I think they were just making shit up at that point.

Honestly “Ancients” tend to always be Cthulhuesque horrors in these sort of things, so I’m not sure how they’d be any different from “the Corrupts.”

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3 years ago

Awh! The light  side sounds so much more appealing now. ^_^

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3 years ago

http://chooseyourstory.com/story/Anything-for-Momma

As I went through this story I was amazingly bored until I hit the fabulous choice to stab Mr. Bad Guy in front of his daughter. Right there and then I knew this game was for me, I stabbed him in front of his daughter, most likely in his foot, then he died. The daughter cried VERY emotional cries then I left to another state. 9/11 I would fantasize about murdering in front of children again. -- Fuccboi Johnson on 11/11/2015 2:45:01 PM

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3 years ago

This has left me feeling depressed, after playing 3 times in a row, I have failed to live anywhere past the age of 17. I wish there was more to the game than just a list of early deaths to make people feel bad about themselves, because I wish I had the opportunity to like this game. As I stand, however, I follow the "three strikes, you're out" principle, and as far as I got, this doesn't have much to it. Now, if you will excuse me, I'm gonna sulk in the corner about how difficult this is. :(

Eternal
primoskate52354 (Score of 0)
12/15/2016 12:53:17 PM

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3 years ago
Guess we need a new article:

Safeguarding Your Fragile Self-Esteem: Learning Not To Take StoryGame Deaths Too Seriously

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3 years ago

lol his follow-up:

Feeling bad about my harsh criticism, I gave this story another try, only to, surprise, die before my 20s for the forth time. if you want an easy, quick story, don't come here. 'Dark Souls' is more forgiving than this game, at least I lived through the training in that game. I'm sorry, but it's hard to remain positive when I have been guillotined, burned, crushed, and dematerialized all before adulthood. I'll leave a better comment when I can reach an ending. until then, I will leave this with a 1/8. I guess I'll go sulk in the corner now... again... :(

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3 years ago

Lol. That's hilarious.

Reminds me of another guy who ranted at me about Death Song and another story and he said how depressed he got, but insisted on continuing to play through anyway.

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3 years ago

'if you want an easy, quick story, don't come here...'

'...to this 8/8 length game with 8/8 difficulty level...'

(Is it okay to tag him? Mockery feels so pointless if he's not reading it.)

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3 years ago
Sharkworld78 on 12/22/2016 for Eternal [delete]
@primoskate52354 no offense, but you must honestly suck if you played THREE TIMES IN A ROW and didnt get past age 17

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3 years ago

Somebody tell this dude that the ratings aren't suppose to be about the ending. It's about, like, the journey, man.

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3 years ago

He probably should play Love SICK, you can't die in that one.

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3 years ago

Love SICK 

"You should make alot more o these but next time put ball busting and cuntbusting in it hahaha. With girls screaming in pain and boys starting to cry but make sure thy are under the age of 16 it qill be fin to rwad and decidw either to have sex with them or to punish their little dicks and pussys so please make anothee one like this."

-- me on 12/4/2016 7:51:26 AM

--------------------------------------------------

Wow. I'm guessing they really enjoyed this story. Judging by the enthusiasm of this comment. 

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3 years ago
Ahahahaha

EDIT: I think they mistook this for that "other" site.

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3 years ago

Adultchooseyourstory.com?

Maybe so, but this comment was still a bit amusing to read.

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3 years ago

... Well it makes a nice change from, "Won't somebody PLEASE think of the children?"
(But to be fair, I think they're thinking of the children too.) ^_^

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3 years ago

My UNUSUAL Day 

I'm going to defend the writer here 

Everyone who talks about the mistakes are haters who wish that they could write as good. THIS STORY WAS FUCKING AWESOME AND YOU KNOW IT!!!

-- Storylover69 on 10/15/2016 8:48:00 PM

--------------------------------------- 

Oh my.

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3 years ago

I wonder if they happen to have the same IP address as the person who wrote the story. ^_^

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3 years ago

Pretty unlikely since GodsSlayer was a very prominent member here back in the day, and hasn't had an IP logged since like 5 years ago.

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3 years ago
@Storylover69 seems just to be an indiscriminate fan of school games, they rated one by the Fairview author too and probably just aren't at a stage yet they can tell the drivel like the 'UNUSUAL' story from the merely mediocre Fairview stuff.

Her own story should be a gem if it's ever finished, though. Very early in development but the all important gender question has already been handled, I will be watching for updates and not allow myself to be disheartened by the fact that she registered one day and left forever the next.

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3 years ago

My favorite unfinished story is still that one I coauthored for awhile before I couldn't handle the stupidity anymore. :)


As well as this thing that I am trying very, very hard not to write a sarcastic review for.

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3 years ago
Ahahaha, is this for real?

I wonder how many half finished stories like this are tucked away around the site. It's hard to stumble across them unless the author's online.

The rainbow cat story is my current favorite, and it's still being added to.

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3 years ago

Unfortunately, this is real :( It reminds me of My Immortal, though not quite as terrible.

I actually stumbled across it when I was stalking online users, so you're right about that.

And that story is? Huh. I may have to stalk it now.

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3 years ago
Think you saw it already, I linked it in another thread: The Red Mist.

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3 years ago

Yeah xD
Didn't realize the author was still active though, since I didn't feel like looking at the profile of whoever would create something like this.

"Furry High School Dating Sim

Exactly as it sounds. A furry dating sim set in a highschool using my ocs. NOTE: although the person you play as is meant to be non binary i might end up referring to them as he or she by accident so when this happens ignore it or pretend mc is a genderfluid whatever floats your boat"

Also, this is one of their games... :(
I think I've given up on life.

There will most likely be mary sues, gary sues, and self-inserts. 

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3 years ago

From Among the Trees

That was really religious, but I like that you like made it be good for Christians. It was amazing.

-- Orchid on 12/12/2016 4:55:56 PM with a score of 0

Steve, your story is now inspiring Christians. I know how much you wanted to do this. Orchid seems to have taken the opposite perspective than what the author intended. :)

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3 years ago
Ahaha, holy shit, he's going to burst a blood vessel.

RIP Steve

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3 years ago

Already bitched about this one. I mean, all my games, barring Only Light, have had anti-religion vibes, and that's only an acception because it's in that mythology.

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3 years ago
Hateclan

You, my friend, need some bible with a side of holy water :)

-- Charmeleon on 12/16/2016 7:20:38 PM with a score of 0

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3 years ago

I'm guessing this guy has left a lot of comments on End's stuff as well, right?

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3 years ago

I... don't really see anything interesting about this comment. I mean... all they're doing is suggesting the author try out some delicious Bible and have it with holy water!

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3 years ago

This, imo, is a feature-worthy troll comment.

why dose everyone hate my work i worked hard waaaaa crys foever 
why me

-- lovewolf455 on 12/21/2016 10:43:38 PM

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3 years ago

Lol! What game was that left on? ^_^

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3 years ago

I can't even remember what the name was (Something kai?), but I recently deleted it. It was pretty bad.

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3 years ago
Think it was the 'froggy day' one. It was about three paragraphs long, and the kid's grammar was, uh...well in my comment I called for his parents and teachers to face a firing squad.

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3 years ago

I deleted that one too. The really shitty stories start blurring together sometimes.

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3 years ago
@lovewolf455 You just posted another one. Explain yourself and your inability to learn from the past. Or at least fess up to being an alt.

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3 years ago
Just ban it. It won't learn.

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3 years ago

Already did.

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3 years ago
Well that would explain the atrocious stories.

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3 years ago

It was the "spend a day as a You kai" one.

I felt so bad for the- wait, not really.

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3 years ago
On a sci-fi story about a robot no less...

Congratulations to the winners of this year's world cup final against the death scene of a minecraft mo creeps me out to be the death eater of clans and I don't have a good day at work and thrive in the creeper rap music and thrive in the only one who is your day going so far so good to hear that you tube videos on YouTube and thrive in the morning of kingdoms mod s and thrive in the morning of the rings and thrive in a crafters isolation of the rings and apparition in a few hours before I go out and apparition in a few minutes late to the party was going on tonight or die to get it back the only way you want it back on my brother in his first game is a great time of year when they realize the death eaters are going to bed early tonight but I'm not a minecraft mods my phone is dead in the oven for about two hours of hoodie episode is the death scene of hoodie -- Tarbo134 on 12/22/2016 2:14:51 AM with a score of 0[delete][feature]

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3 years ago

That is one big run on sentence.

So that's how a comment is deleted/featured...

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3 years ago
Same guy -

Trvfgxsggvvffzzefde rd e rd eff hubs gggggggg gfs s fyi gfs fishing g buy f chm it s fi uhh re fi I Hz ziti the death eaters think of kingdoms mod minecraft mo creeps mod wiki this week and a half ago when I was going to the death scene and I want to see you tomorrow morning and I am going out tonight but if you want to go out with Guns blazing fast food restaurant and bar with Guns blazing sun was shining and the creeper s fyi we are going out with you tube videos on YouTube video games and apparition of hoodie and thrive in the death scene of a crime in the United States is your plan for tomorrow morning at Freddy Sanchez and the only way to get it is your favorite food and drug administration -- Tarbo134 on 12/22/2016 2:10:25 AM [delete][feature

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3 years ago

It's like he's just spewing random words...

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3 years ago

I saw minecraft and creepers while skimming through that.

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3 years ago

I think he's using the Auto Complete function on a phone.

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3 years ago

Oh! Now it makes sense... I think... Maybe? frown

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3 years ago

This one is an Infinite Story classic where someone had a problem with a guy called BatCountry. Glad I saved it in the archives before the forums went dead over there.

Fuck you batcountry.

I fucking hate your ass and it's past time you got the message

WTF is wrong with you anyway? Apparently you can't fix your own damn computer (guess you were stumbling around drunk and fell on it or some shit) so you take it to some piece of shit place where they're gonna charge you out the ass for it and keep it a fucking week? Fuck that. I bet you went to Best Buy, didn't you? lol

They probably have to keep it that long just to download your porn collection. Or wait, I got it, maybe you are too helpless to get to the store on your own, and you have to wait for one of your useless, shitty friends to make time to drive down there and pick the goddamn thing up. fuck you

also if you could get up off the couch you could start getting some bottles & cans together to try to pay for this shit, cause I can only imagine you are going into some deep fucking debt over this.

This is what I think your "life" is like. You wake up at some point in the afternoon because the family dog is pissing on you again, cause you refuse to take care of your fucking pet and let it out in the yard once in awhile. You just leave the toilet lid up so it can drink, and it would still starve except you never put the motherfucking mcdonalds bags away, so it gets whatever is left in the wrapper

You lay there and let the dog piss on you. You meant to spend last night coming up with a bunch of bullshit excuses for all the shit you aren't going to do today, but you procrastinated, whoops, so fuck you. Your "brain" is working overtime trying to come up with some believable shit (protip: no one buys it), and it takes you awhile to notice what's going on.

If only your whore mother hadn't dropped you as a child, maybe you would've moved out of the way sooner, you know? Fuck. BTW, I had sex with her a few days ago, just to see what five bucks and handful of goddamn fishsticks would buy. I'd give her a 3, on a good day.

Anyway your mind isn't working, so you go into meltdown mode. you scream like a little bitch and wave your fat fucking arms in the air, slamming at anything that comes in reach. That may be what happened to the computer if you even owned one in the first place. The dog doesn't even fucking move, just sits there like an asshole & licks himself.

after an hour or two you realize what the problem is. you are thirsty.

you haven't moved your fat ass to get anything to drink for days so you are dry as hell at this point. you try but you can't get up.
you have no choice but to drink the dog piss, and because you're a waste of skin, douchebag tard pile of shit and you probably forgot, I'll remind you, it started out as toilet water, so who knows what the fuck is in it.

it's not even good in terms of dog piss. the dog was a syphilitic manwhore before you got it so again, god knows what you are doing to yourself but you pull the blanket & cushions over and suck out as much as your lame ass can stand. you are such a jackoff, jizz-rag mistake of a person that it tires you out & you sleep seven or eight more hours.

When you are awake again, some of your fingers are fucking missing. Maybe the dog got an easy meal, maybe they just got tired of dealing with your fat ass and bailed. fuck it.

you vomit up what is left of the dog piss and roll off the couch, forgetting you had just fucking vomited there. No one paid the bills since your two-timing camwhore bitch of a mother left your ass months ago, so, no power, but you manage to crawl three feet in the goddamn dark and get the emergency cell phone. its a burner your mom's racist jigaboo crack dealer left but somehow there is texting.

You power it up and try to send out your excuses for the day. But you are such an unmotivated lardass that the crawl tired you out, so you only get one off. Apparently that was to this site, so whoop-de-fucking-do, now we get to deal with it. I am so fucking tired of this bullshit. Fuck you.

You could've called whatever piece of shit dive you sent the computer to and got them to send you the file, or got someone with a fucking forklift to wheel your ass down to the place with a flash drive. Or just tell them they made a mistake, it doesn't need fixing, and hope maybe they can drop it by, but no.

You could even copy subtitles from the beast porn you're probably into and just paste it in, probably be an improvement. Next thing you'll try to lie like the two-faced toerag abortion failure you are and say they lost the computer so the contest is cancelled or some shit, fuck that. I don't fucking believe this.

It's the middle of goddamn march. You are a rugmunching, cocksucking, shitfaced dickless weasel of a person with no ability to make it happen and I hate you. It is hard to put that into words but for the love of fucking christ I have tried. Get your ass in gear or set yourself on fire, either way is good. Fuck you.

I'm sorry the rest of you had to see that, but that's just the way it is. Fucking hell. If you have anything to add this might be the time so homeboy can see what the fuck is up with this shit.
peace.

-- Rapist Jeff

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3 years ago

... This is the most beautiful piece of literature I have ever seen. I think a tear just rolled down my eye, it really did. heart

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3 years ago

Well it seems I have a few new insults to add to the arsenal now.

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3 years ago

The True Story of Ram Sutcosky 

This game taught me an important lesson. I am never eating breakfast again. Even though it is the only meal I currently eat, I have realized that not eating breakfast will equate to me FUCKING a girl within two days. Also what was with the alley shit? That was what made this game not as good as Reese's Cups. But it was worth every penny. It was free. So technically every game should be worth every penny. I hope I had a lot of s3x with my b!tch Cori ;)

-- hob gobbler (joncameranors gir on 6/10/2016 7:12:33 PM with a score of 0

---------------------------------------------

I also feel that a humor tag should be added to this storygame. 

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3 years ago

Hey Mom 

Gotta say, the title of this story is disappointingly misleading considering that it’s in the Love and Romance section.

-- EndMaster on 6/12/2016 4:05:53 PM 

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3 years ago

Lol, I remember that one.

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3 years ago

It made me laugh when I read it, but that also caused me to spill juice on myself.

Darn you! 

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3 years ago

TROLLED! 1/8 until I am un-banned from this site!

-- TROLLIN NECROKID on 1/4/2017 9:46:11 AM with a score of 0

 

Haha. Omg. This kid. I don't think he realizes his rating doesn't do shit. XD

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3 years ago

What story is this?

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3 years ago

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3 years ago

That story looks like it might be taken down soon anyway.

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3 years ago

Well, it was a pretty short story.

Kain amuses me.

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3 years ago

Apparently Kain is Crescent's friend. I think she already explained the situation to him, but he's not listening.

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3 years ago

Pfffh, I wrote a fucking guide for dealing with getting banned. Bastards never listen. I do quite enjoy how he "attacked" a game that probably deserves a 1/8.

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3 years ago

So much trolling, giving a storygame the rating it deserved.

I'm terrified :( He should definitely be unbanned before he does this again!

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3 years ago
Oh poor Kain, does he not know? There is only one way to get unbanned on CYS, and it requires something he most likely doesn't have, a soul. Only when he has traded his soul to EndMaster can he come back here, no earlier!

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3 years ago

Honestly there's no coming back for Kain, he plagiarized. I'm more willing to forgive some trolling asshole before that.

The best that Kain could do is he'd have to get a different IP, lay low, have a new name that isn't totally suspicious, and basically never post on the forums (thus exposing his fucktardery) and hope I never discover who he really is.

Oh and not plagiarize any stories while he's at it.

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3 years ago

I don't think he's smart enough to do all that :( poor guy

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3 years ago

*Changes his IP and makes a non suspicious name, makes an original story, then posts in the newbie section: “Hi, I used to go by the name Kain, now I’m back with a new story I just created!”*

BANNED

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3 years ago

Lol. Is it bad if I can actually see that happening?

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3 years ago
Bull. He just needs to present you with his mother. You're easy to win over.

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3 years ago

Was that when he plagarized the Dungeons and Dragons shit? I can't remember.

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3 years ago
Correct.

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3 years ago

"That was really religious, but I like that you like made it be good for Christians. It was amazing." - Orchid

"I love the Wooden Ring ending, but this story is so anti-Christian that I can't give it anything above a 2. Every other ending has some jab or another at Christianity. Disgusting! I mean, come on. The author clearly tries to imply that Christians are "superstitious" and "self-loathing". Such pure hatred! "- The Ghost

Neither are interesting in their own right, but I enjoy the contrast.

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3 years ago

Here's another on one of Steve's stories:

Blooded

This is just so much of 2 dimensional darkness that it's disappointing. You could squeeze it until it's brains pop out, and do you know what it's brains would be? Pencil markings! There's no love, no anger, no desperation, depression!!! There's no joy, hope, familial bonds...There's no humanity to it!!!

-- WaitForIt on 12/22/2016 12:12:17 AM with a score of 0

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3 years ago

ADMIN EDIT: So it wasn't stretching out the forum

This kid is hilarious lol

 

BRING ME BAK OR I'LL TROLL FOREVER...............FOREVER.............ENDMASTER............CRESECENTSTAR, LET ME DIE..................SHE.................TOLD..................ENDMASTER..................

-- NECROKID on 1/4/2017 2:00:48 PM

 

BRING ME BAK OR TROLLING WILL NEVER STOP

-- NECROKID on 1/4/2017 1:53:29 PM with a score of 0

 

He thinks this is trolling xD

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3 years ago

Crescent just mentioned she knew him, but not any of his alts. It's pretty easy to figure those out when you can see IPs.

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3 years ago

Has he still been trying to come back? XD

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3 years ago

Just deleted two more of his alts, so yeah he's still skulking about.

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3 years ago

Holy fuck, that kid is either really determined or a true fucktard. And i'm guessing it's the second one. How many alts of his have been banned now?

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3 years ago

When I was counting them up, I was thinking "I don't remember banning him this much." then I realized I was counting up DrkPhoenix's alts.

Anyway Kain's up to 15 so far.

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3 years ago

Lol. Poor kid. I'm sure his trolling will improve with age... Got to say, the "Let me die" bit does confuse me. I highly doubt anybody on the sight is preventing him from dying... Or even discouraging it at that. >.<

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3 years ago

Hey, two in one day!

"I really DO hope for a part 2,because I hate cliffhangers!" - hristoscof

On Achilles. Like, it's in the description, for fuck's sake.

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3 years ago

So this story is pretty interesting...

http://chooseyourstory.com/story/hiiiii

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3 years ago
I don't think they like mizal.

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3 years ago
Who does?

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3 years ago

*raises hand* :D

Well, technically I like everyone?

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3 years ago

...Even Kain?

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3 years ago

*thinks* hmm...I don't hate him or dislike him. 

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3 years ago

So you're neutral towards him?

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3 years ago

Apathetic, neutral. Yeah.

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3 years ago

So you really don't hate anyone?

...what about Educational Television actors?

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3 years ago

It's hard for me to hate anyone, and I can count on one hand the people I truly hate.

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3 years ago

I wish I was like you xD

I hate a ton of people... mainly the people who invented Elmo.

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3 years ago

Why Elmo, exactly?

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3 years ago

I'll tell you in the form of a short song.

*Ahem*

In Elmo there's a monster in the garbage can,

The show is hosted by a little red man,

That's not creepy at all! That's not creepy at all!

 

In Elmo there's a man named Doodles in the closet,

He loves to mess with the bathroom faucet,

That's not creepy at all! That's not creepy at all!

 

In Elmo there is an insane beaver,

And for some reason he has a meat cleaver,

That's not creepy at all! That's not creepy at all!

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3 years ago

Huh. Okay, I'm going to admit right now I have never watched Elmo before so I'm completely lost xD

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3 years ago

You're so fucking lucky. Never, EVER watch it unless you want your eyes to bleed.

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3 years ago

Doesn't this make two stories dedicated to be being angry at Mizal?

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3 years ago
End PMed me the link and holy shit, please don't do these while I'm at work. People were probably wondering what I was in the bathroom laughing about.

I'm not even sure what story they're mad about, it's been a slow couple of weeks, we haven't really had any of the one star darlings. None that I remember really getting special attention anyhow.

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3 years ago

Sinning time :D 

"WHOEVER DELETED MY LAST STORY FUCK YOU" 
Hmm...I wonder why your last story was deleted. Oh! Perhaps it was a 1/8 garbage that you kept spam republishing? 

"YO BRANDON LETS WRITE ANOTHER STORY BECAUSE THESE MOTHERFUCKERS DONT UNDERSTAND THE ART OF COMEDY" 
Saying this makes people assume Brandon is a person, or even a friend, when Brandon is actually the name of your cat. Its obvious you have absolutely no friends as you're wasting your time making this. 
Also, comedy is BIG LETTERS PEOPLE. BIG LETTERS. NOTHING GETS PEOPLE LAUGHING MORE THAN LETTERS THAT MAKE IT SEEM LIKE SOMEONE IS SCREAMING AT YOU. HEY! WHY AREN'T YOU LAUGHING? 

"FUCK U MIZAL AND YOUR COMMENT 


THIS IS NOT THE SAME PERSON THAT WROTE THAT FILLER EPISODE BUT I AM FRIENDS WITH THE OTHER WRITER" 
That would be a very awkward threesome. 
Also, that's rather hard to believe. The fact that you have real friends, I mean. You should really get the "voices in your head that claim to be your friends" checked out though.
Also, discount white knight. 

"FUUUUUUCCCCKKK YOU" 
No thank you. I have standards, low as they are. 

"HAHAHAHAH TRY BLOCKING ME AGAIN BITCHES 


IM JUST GONNA WRITE ANOTHER STORY 


THERE IS NOTHING U CAN DO ABOUT IT 


ESPECIALLY U MIZAL" 
Hmm...I wonder what can be done about this? Oh, yes. Banned. 
;) 

Total Sin Tally: 9 
Sentence: "FUUUUUUCCCCKKK YOU" 

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3 years ago
To quote EndMaster - "BANNED"

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3 years ago
Damn, gone now.

I'm glad I happened to check my PMs this morning or some fascist mod would've deleted that work of art before I even got a chance to see it. Thanks for salvaging what you could here, Seto.

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3 years ago
Okay, some admin is really on a roll now as far as being an unfun asshole goes. :[

@BerkaZerka @Killa_Robot I'm very disappointed in at least one of you.

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3 years ago
I for one, blame Ford.

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3 years ago

Ghostly Mystery 

This game is the biggest load of hogwash I have ever experienced in my 82 long years. This will be the last time I ever use this 'internet' evil and start replacing my porn collection with a wholesome ferret collection.<br><br>May Satan have mercy on your soul,<br><br>Sir Farran Daw OBE

-- Farran Daw on 10/19/2004 10:29:48 PM

------------------------------------------

More than a decade old, this must be rare.

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3 years ago

Hey

I don't think he hates the internet if he can code

I don't think he's also actually 82 if he can fuck up on coding

But if he is, he's probably dead by now

We can take solace in this

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3 years ago

I just wonder if he was ever successful in creating his wholesome ferret collection. 

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3 years ago

This begs the question:

How does one go about making a ferret "collection", anyway? (let alone a "wholesome" one)

Does he just have one of each species of ferret, or does he take the extra step and go full Noah's Ark, with one male and one female per species?

How does he acquire these ferrets? By buying them or catching them? Can you even buy some species? And if he does buy them, do they just let him buy 10 ferrets and leave the store with them? Does animal control get involved?

But the most important question:

What does he do with his porn?!

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3 years ago

Not dead enough, old chap.

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3 years ago

I want to know why he felt the need to replace his porn with ferrets. I mean, those aren't mutually exclusive things!

Also, I don't believe the Farran Daw that posted in this thread is the same drive-by guest until there is verification from the mods.

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3 years ago

He's not.

It was me.

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3 years ago

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3 years ago

Slender.com

I came back to this site a couple of weeks ago after a long time away from it to discover that a purge policy had been instated. I was up until now hesitant about the policy, thinking that more storygames were still a good thing, whether they were much good or not. 

Well, I can safely say that I am now 100% in support of purging.

-- pime on 1/6/2017 9:53:42 AM with a score of 0

Glad to see our glorious brand of keeping order is being appreciated around here.

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3 years ago

I'm pro-pime.

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3 years ago

Here, for the benefit of those who missed it, I just copy/pasted the funzies path:

Mizal is a bitch, whore, cunty fuckface

So you like mizal do you? Think she's a cool person? Well fuck you all! I shall expose her for the evil, soulless, racist, sexist, homophobic, xenophobic, suicide bombing, AIDs ridden whore that she is! (She's probably a pedo too. If you have a child, there's a 90% chance that mizal has touched them inappropriately at some point in time. Just thought I should let you know.)

So, you've just arrived on the site and have decided to make your very first story-game. You're so excited to show off your writing talent to the CYS community. What kind of story do you wat to write?

A steaming pile of horse crap that I threw together in five minutes with no real plot-line where half the words are spelled incorrectly and there's a bunch of pages with no links because I got bored and couldn't be bothered to finish the game.

And finally, your magnum opus "christal gos 2 skool" is complete! You proudly publish it for the world to see and shortly after you see that you have a comment! Why, it appears to be from mizal. Let's see what she has to say...

"This game was not very good. Please try harder next time."
... Well, what are you going to do about that?

... Why that little bitch! Fuck her, she's just jealous of me! I'll show her! I'll write a story game all about what an evil, monkey-raping cunt she is! That'll teach her to fuck with me!

You transfer all your rage into an equally crappy story game all about what a bitch mizal is and how much you hate her! In this game, you kindly explain to all the members of CYS that she only gave you a negative review because she's so jealous of your raw talent and she knows she could never be as good a writer as you!

Finally, you end the game by giving the player the option to brutally sodomise mizal with a baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire and your game is done! You wait a little while and see that once again, mizal is the first to leave a comment! Let's see what she has to say now...

"Oh dear God, I am so sorry! I had no idea the pain that I was causing to you and all other sub-par writers with the negative reviews that I left. I thought I was being helpful by encouraging people to put more effort into their story-games. Now I see that I was only hurting people and I cannot live with myself anymore. I pray that one day you will be able to forgive me."

That same day, mizal takes her life by filling every body opening she has with epoxy until she finally explodes. Every noob, troll and general shitty writer on CYS celebrates! Never again will you have to suffer the sting of constructive criticism!!! ... You know, except from every other member of the site.

Congratulations! You have won the game! Free cookies for everyone! ^_^

Oh and here's Rommy's comment:

I can see how some people might not understand this game, but I, for one, applaud this fauvist approach to CYOA. The raw emotion, and the disregard to mainstream writing conventions present in this piece sets a brave, avant-gardist, new path for an art form that is so often bogged down in clichés like structure and storyline.

The pseudonym under which the writer published this work gives an 'outsider art' feeling to the piece that strengthens its message of protest, and disregard for the social conventions that dictate the 'proper' form of stories both on this site, and the broader writing community.

However, while this daring piece of art should, in my opinion, go down into the annals of CYS history, I only regret its relatively short size, and the focus on one particular aspect of the CYS writing community, while it could have been presented as a magnum opus manifesto to break down the walls of social conventions. Though this is certainly a good beginning.

All in all, a story that's worth reading through, before its inevitable deletion.
-- Romulus on 1/7/2017 7:34:37 AM

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3 years ago
Excellent. I only had a minute to skim it on my phone before.

Give that author a trophy.

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3 years ago
Next time, do more than skim before rating it - you give the false impression that you've actually seen it before it gets removed.

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3 years ago
on homo perfectus 8: "It is quite long and hard but not unbeatable."

boy did I giggle in my immaturity.

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3 years ago
Hrmm, Bioshock influence, eh? Cool. Out of all the new storygames, this was one of the few that I enjoyed. 5/8
-- @Marinirani on 1/18/2017 5:42:05 PM


On a story with '1984' in the title itself.

I hate children.

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3 years ago

Could be worse. Someone could bring up the fact that they didn't know the country was so oppressive thirty three years ago. 

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3 years ago

What's worse is that none of the Bioshocks take place in that time period.

What story was it?

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3 years ago

The comment says it's a new storygame and was published today, and Mizal said it has 1984 in the title.

Try hard to find this information, Tim.

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3 years ago

I'm not touching the New Storygames section with a ten foot pole.

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3 years ago
e: Only read my post if Steve's hints aren't helpful enough.


http://chooseyourstory.com/story/1984~3a-cog-in-the-machine

Newest one posted.

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3 years ago
Here's a very old game with a collection of strange and mostly terribly written comments: http://chooseyourstory.com/story/You're-the-Bachelor

None of them too amazing on their own, but I was just going through the list and being very glad we're such a different site now. (Oh, and there's no way in hell this story deserves a 4.75, so feel free to correct the errors of the past as much as you're able.)

Anyway, have a sampling:

crap, too boring, not enough options & adult themes & suggestive comments -- james on 1/9/2003 2:55:35 AM

this game is a little boring because there is not animation just black and white pictures. if i got to see pictures of the ladies and the bachelor or somtetihng it would have made ti mroe intersting. -- Erin on 1/7/2003 6:30:24 PM

Boring! need pictures and animations -- Tom on 5/10/2003 3:01:51 PM

I think that you should have real pictures of the girls. Also, I think you should have a bachelor and bachelorette option, so that girls can play as well. -- kelly on 1/7/2003 12:07:33 PM

How about these possible threads?
- visit the Playboy mansion and get jiggy with it
- after choosing the girl you like, get a Uzi 9mm to shoot all the birds that you don't like at the end
- hangin' and bangin'

yours,
Rick B
University of Washington -- SeanCon on 2/1/2003 6:58:33 PM

Fine story until the end. That was an absolutely horrible ending. This game should be destroyed. -- Bob on 2/28/2003 3:02:53 PM

I'm kickin it with Gemma right now...she's making me nachos. I think we're gonna get jiggy with the cheeze sauce......oh..great game!!! -- the dude on 6/1/2003 12:50:53 AM

good game lol. i dint get past da 1st elimanation but it was cool. i went 2 get rid off da intelligent lot. :( -- kieran on 6/5/2003 3:52:18 PM

Ha! I've done many embarrassing things on dates, but never have I impaled a woman...oh wait a minute...strike that... -- el kabong on 12/31/2003 5:01:22 PM

I AM GOD'S GREATEST GIFT TO THE OPPOSITE SEX! -- Freebooter on 5/13/2004 4:28:29 AM

I loved it! I wish that it were real, cause I'm single, and all. -- SingleandLookin on 5/13/2005 8:18:30 PM

You know the last pic of the tub. That was soo unappropiate. How bout making a game that doesn't include, sexuality. -- Jan on 7/4/2005 11:21:56 AM

bad ending....dude,,just because she went crazy doesnt mean i want to go home..i knew that was a possibility when i made that decision...just eliminate her and move on...your game made me angry..i hope the game gods have their way with you.+ -- ray videc on 7/7/2005 3:27:28 AM

Way to many innuendos and mature hints for the maturity level the creator chose for the story. Keep your children away from this one. -- Rafe on 5/28/2015 3:17:27 PM

This game was really cool, kind of like reading a choose your own adventure book but even beteer. I'd play this one again -- David on 6/8/2003 9:40:23 AM

....you don't say.

I tried it a couple different ways, and despite my negative nature (View my other posts) I actually enjoyed this. Wow! I won a couple of different ways but I think there shouldent be any wrong choices: 7/10 my second best score given! -- JJJ on 5/31/2005 2:38:46 PM

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3 years ago

Wait... 3J wrote "shouldent"? *Rings a little bell* Shame. Shame. Shame. Shame.

Also I like the amount of people complaining about the lack of pictures and animation in a text based game. ^_^

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3 years ago
I actually can't prove that that's him since it just says 'JJJ' and he wasn't logged in, but he claims he did all kinds of embarrassing stuff here when he was 15.

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3 years ago

I had just turned 13 when I wrote that comment haha.

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3 years ago

Not an excuse! Shame! ^_^

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3 years ago

3J has been shamed? Wow. Now i've seen everything.

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3 years ago

I'll take 13 year old me over 13 year old you!

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3 years ago

I'll have you know 13 year old me was highly intelligent, spelled everything correctly and could hold her breath underwater fr 10 minutes! ^_^

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3 years ago

I think any living person knows how to spell "Everything" correctly.

Wait, you meant the WORD "everything" right?

Otherwise i've just shamed myself by being a noob

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3 years ago

I'm afraid you overestimate the spelling skills of your fellow man. Pretty sure I've seen "Everyting" and even "Everythink" a few times. >.<

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3 years ago

That's not as bad as when someone pronounces "Blossom" as "Bell-aw-sum"

That's when you know they're a pokemon fan.

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3 years ago
I've seen "Everyting" occasionally, but how does one accidentally replace a "g" with a "k" on a QWERTY keyboard? They're on opposite sides of the keyboard spectrum, after all. Not to mention that the closest letter to "k" is "I", not "g".

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3 years ago

... And I just realized I spelled "For" wrong. My writing skills must be fading in my old age. crying

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3 years ago

Lol

That is the funniest thing ever.

"13 year old me spelled everything correctly"

*makes typo*

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3 years ago

I'm just going to chalk this up as a win for 13-year-old me.

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3 years ago

Not just yet, 3J. In "The Tower" when you say thanks to Havacoman, it says "are" instead of "our!"

The 13 year old war shall never stop! (Or war in general)

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3 years ago

You wanna compare yourself to 13 year-old them? (Assuming you've even reached that age yet, hahalol)

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3 years ago

1) I'm not comparing myself to anyone.

2) I'm older then 13

3) -.-

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3 years ago

Lemme guess, you're 14?

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3 years ago

Getting warmer.

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3 years ago

Nah, I'll leave it undefined. That way, you can have an excuse for your folly.

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3 years ago

Minnie is older than me

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3 years ago

I'm 18.

I'm older then you? I have more awesomeness!

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3 years ago
I played MUDS at 12, I have you all beat. On the means streets of Skara Brae, a typo could mean the difference between life and death, and you had to be fast.

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3 years ago

You know the last pic of the tub. That was soo unappropiate. How bout making a game that doesn't include, sexuality. -- Jan on 7/4/2005 11:21:56 AM

Way to many innuendos and mature hints for the maturity level the creator chose for the story. Keep your children away from this one. -- Rafe on 5/28/2015 3:17:27 PM

For some reason these two stood out as the funniest.

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3 years ago

For some reason I read 3J's comment in a seven year olds voice >~<